Average Whiteboy
Bluelighter
My mom called me a beach bum and a lost cause
Since I'm always messing with the TV or radio like I'm a media watchdog
"You'll never get a girlfriend, you look too sloppy!"
Whatever, I can jackoff and pretend that Latin chicks are calling me papi
Because after my last relationship, I'm on some Alice Deejay shit 'cause I'm "Better Off Alone"
I left California and came back, realizing I'm better off at home
I'm better off behind the wheel of a Chrysler Fifth Avenue with a candy paintjob
Show up at your company's Christmas party, piss on the dancefloor and then pass out after drinking 37 cups of rum and egg nog
But those drinks better be free or I can't stay
I'm broke as fuck, so if I gotta pay then I must be on my way
Yeah, I'm a loser, marijuiana abuser
A young troublemaker from NorCal with no future
And the rumors are true, I'm a nasty dude
I'd drink Eva Longoria's bathwater if she asked me to
Only two days left to stock up on weed, pills, hard liquor and beer
'Cause that's the only way to ring in the New Year
Since I'm always messing with the TV or radio like I'm a media watchdog
"You'll never get a girlfriend, you look too sloppy!"
Whatever, I can jackoff and pretend that Latin chicks are calling me papi
Because after my last relationship, I'm on some Alice Deejay shit 'cause I'm "Better Off Alone"
I left California and came back, realizing I'm better off at home
I'm better off behind the wheel of a Chrysler Fifth Avenue with a candy paintjob
Show up at your company's Christmas party, piss on the dancefloor and then pass out after drinking 37 cups of rum and egg nog
But those drinks better be free or I can't stay
I'm broke as fuck, so if I gotta pay then I must be on my way
Yeah, I'm a loser, marijuiana abuser
A young troublemaker from NorCal with no future
And the rumors are true, I'm a nasty dude
I'd drink Eva Longoria's bathwater if she asked me to
Only two days left to stock up on weed, pills, hard liquor and beer
'Cause that's the only way to ring in the New Year
