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jealousy

Mellabopper

Bluelighter
Joined
Oct 16, 2000
Messages
3,811
Location
Boston
jealous, i am
but jealous,
i should not be.
but i cant fight
the thoughts,
the emotions
that are in me.
jealousy
will end friendships
even before they have begun
she's got
what i dont
so i hold that against her.
and because i was never good enough
or pretty enough
i instantly hated those that were
because they had
what i never did
attention and popularity
the spotlight
the boys
and their words weighed more than mine.
so i didnt try to be what they are
i turned and walked the other way
hoping it would get me somewhere
anywhere
but there
because jealousy was winning
and it turned
into self-loathing.
and i couldnt stand to see
the physical manifestation
of the things
i could never be.
12-1-01
Mellabopper
 
the things you could never be?
mella, you are so much more!
Lily Tomlin said something like this once,
"I wanted to be somebody in life.
Now I see I should have been more specific."
And somebody else (can't remember who) said this: "My one regret in life is that i am not someone else."
Everyone always wants to be someone they are not. But this is just a little reminder that you are someone i admire... in lots of ways. I hope you realize that.
------------------
E-girl
IM: tiggersgurl2067
Find one person you can count on forever, one person you can love forever, and one person you can be with forever... and if you're lucky, it will all be the same person.
"Live for the memories."
 
"Don't waste your time on jealousy.
Sometimes you're ahead, sometimes you're behind.
The race is long . . . and in the end, it's only with yourself."
- Mary Schmich
 
Dang, Mel...that spoke to me!!! Very well written...
smile.gif
 
sometimes we all get unsatisfied with our lot in life....."theres no use wishing for life to give you a better hand, what really matters is how you play the hand that youve been dealt"-I dont remember who said it, or even the exact words used but the general gist stuck with me....instead of looking at other people as things to be jealous of look at them as motivation,you want something then get it
smile.gif

personally I cant see what you have to be jealous of cause you are an amazing gorgeous person,and if you can get an idea through to a bonehead like me then youve obviously got talent
smile.gif

*anthony gives mella a kiss on the forehead*
[This message has been edited by harraser (edited 02 December 2001).]
 
Mella,
You ARE beautiful! Extremely. Plus you are unique which makes you even more beautiful and talented.
------------------
To see evil in thy eyes,
is not to see thy inner
self.
But to see goodness,
is discover thy soul.
 
nice work mel. i'd insert some sort of supportive comment here but i'll refrain because it's all been said before... by you.
you rock, i hope i get to see you before winter break. take care
wink.gif
 
I've found jealousy hurts, but is often unfounded.
Your words still touched a chord, however.
 
eek!
I dunno what you mean by "not pretty enough" Mella.. you make boys blood pressure rise (in a good way) all the time.. {{Mella}}
see ya in da loo! :)
 
Hey. I know this medium can be limiting, but I feel for you.
I've absorbed so much from your production here that, well
I care about you.
I do hope you'll continue to work these things out for the positive.
-much love,
( me )
 
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