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  • TDS Moderators: AlphaMethylPhenyl | paranoid android

I've set my quit date! :D

It sounds like you want to regain control and power in your life. Good for you.
It sounds like your life is challenging you with family problems. Your brother sounds immature.

Your problems will never, ever go away. People have problems. End of story. We must deal with them, and there is no way to avoid them, or to stop all problems. If you use problems as a reason to stay on drugs, you will never have a reason to stop drugs.

I hope that you can take control and decide to stop Sub despite having problems.

I think that you have thought about it carefully, and planned it out very thoughtfully.
The exercise will definitely help.

Like Bojangles, I do not trust people who say "I will quit on this date".
If someone really, honestly is going to quit, they will do it right NOW. Waiting for some date in the future is usually an excuse.
I would suggest that, if you are honestly going to quit, you cut back to .25 right now.
There is no reason at all to wait.
Then, you should have a chance to cut back again on quantity or time (e.g. to once every 30 hours, then 36 hours), before June 8th, if you are serious about this. Doing so will ease the pain in June.

With your addiction and your family troubles, I feel your pain, friend.
Please be strong, and true to yourself!
 
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I know how you feel with your mom, my moms the same way and she laughs when i tell her things I've learned on this site. One time I actually sat her down to read some of the things talked about on here just to show her it's not just a bunch of lowlife drug addicts who don't know anything. I think she just wants what's best for you, or she wouldn't be paying for your script, altho it is fucking expensive I can see why she would want you to stop. Your doc does do this every day as his job, and although he may not know what it's like to be an addict, he does know how your body works and what certain drugs at what doses will do to your body. I think the taper plan he set out for you is probably the best and safest medical way to taper down.

I think that she doesn't know what to think in this whole situation. She knows that she has no idea what your going through or what it's like, so when a licensed professional tells her something she's much more inclined to believe what they have to say over something you've read on a website.

The fact that your already telling yourself that your not gonna be able to stay sober and that your not ready to stop will insure that you'll relapse. You've already planted the idea in your head that it's not going to work, so when you do relapse it'll be expected rather than unplanned I'm not trying to set you up for failure or assuming that your not gonna make it, you've already done that. The mind controls everything about your body so when you tell it that your not gonna stay sober, your not, simple as that. When I was using even when I wasn't high I'd feel soo much better knowing I had drugs at home readily available to me. That right there is mind over matter.

What insurance do you have? Ive found that with most insurances you'll need a recommendation to see a specialist or another doc. I do know that there are federal suboxone programs for people with low incomes who can't afford it where they make it basically free. Also in my state weve been getting these discount cards for the suboxone film given out by the Rx companies, so you should check out both those options. As far as your doc setting a quit date for you, and forcing you to taper, it's rather unconventional among sub docs, but I mean in the end we just gotta play the hand were dealt.

I'll tell you that your VERY lucky to have gotten clonodines, valiums and I believe you mentioning you have some somas and trams? You'll be FINE. I went 5 days with only OTCs, I had trams for 2 days which made it MUCH more bearable. Your scaring yourself when you think about the future. Granted the future should be planned for, but not dwelled on. If you put one foot in tomorrow and one foot in yesterday you piss all over day (and no I did not steal that, I was told that in rehab back in '03 so suck on it ppl)

Your a blood drinkin bullet spittin marine. You mean to tell me you can't get through this? Nonsense. When it comes to your parents and friends, there isn't a whole lot you can do short of forcing it down their throat. Things got a lot better when I just sat down with my mom and explained to her exactly what it was I was gonna be dealing with, and that my best chance for success is with everyone around me doing their best to understand what's going on.

When you say an addict has a better idea of what's going on inside them than a doctor, it's true to an extent. You do know how your body reacts to certain things and what works best for you, but addicts, especially in w.d don't always tend to think clearly and could sometimes just be looking for the easiest way out, which may not always be the most health beneficial. And to your doctor, that's probably what he's hearing. I'll agree that they don't know a whole lot about certain things altho they like to think they do. when I went in and told him how bad my sub w.d were he seemed baffled that I was in such bad of shape.

You need a strong support system, and although your parents probly don't fully understand how it is, it's your job to explain it to them in a calm civil matter. That goes for your friends too. Just sit down with your rents and explain the best you can exactly what things are gonna be like for you in a few weeks. U know, explain what your gonna need around the house to eat, drink, different meds, everything to make it more comfortable. The fact that you don't wanna be ruled by a substance anymore shows a good chance for successful sobriety, and that you are ready to stop, but your scared. It's justified, but you need to be strong. The worse part of w.d isn't gonna last over 10 days or so, if that. You'll still feel a little physical symptoms after that, but it'll seem like a walk in the park compared to what you just went through. It will end, and you need to keep reminding yourself that all the hard work you've put in for so long will all be a waste if you go back to what you've been doin. you need to ask yourself if it's really worth it, and I know you know it isn't.

You know how to reach me if you ever gotta talk or vent, as well as you have a huge support system on this site. But you should def start goin to meetings if you haven't started already to build a real life support system. While your w.d I know it always makes me feel really good to know I have people who have dealt with what I'm doing and that i can count on to speak with when I need to. I don't think any addict is fully ready to stop, but you starting the sub program as well as seeking help from us show that your in a step to the right direction.

And there's nothing wrong with you wanting to ask your doc what his success rate is with the suboxone program, plus I'm pretty sure he's obligated by law to tell you if you want to know. It's not an uncommon request.
 
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I don't know. I mean, people stay on Subs their whole lives without problems. Not that I want to stay on Sub for the rest of my life. I'm just saying... it might seem like the right way to him, but... yeah. I just don't think Suboxone is something that should be completely in the doctor's control; I feel like both the doctor and the patient should come to an agreement. I know the way my brain works, and I'm sure it's not much different for other addicts. You can't just... force someone to get clean before they're ready.

And who knows... maybe I will stay clean. Maybe I'll have the self control to be a good little D.A.R.E. student and "just say no". If I can relapse just because I'm saying I will, then I can just as easily not relapse by telling myself I'll stay clean. It's just hard to keep a positive mindset about all this when my family is doing things to remind me why life was better when I didn't have to feel anything. But at this point, it's all speculation really. Right now I'm just trying not to worry about it too much and take it one day at a time. I'll deal with the future when it comes.

I haven't heard about those discount card things, but I have heard about that program. I already applied for it a long time ago and was denied. I'll check out those discount things though. Oh and no I don't have somas... someone just suggested I get those. I do have Trams, but I only have 2 left. I've come across websites that sell both, but I'm not sure how legal that is? The last thing I need is police knocking on my door for buying prescription drugs online while I'm going through withdrawals lol. I'd have to check into what the laws are in my state for that. If worse comes to worse, I could find a state where it is legal and have a friend order it for me then mail it to me. Good thing about being in the military is having friends all over the U.S. :) He DID say he would give me clonodine however, just that he was concerned about whether it was safe for me to take... and I THINK he said he was going to give me Valium... but I could have just been hearing what I wanted to hear and he actually said something else. I can't be sure, he refused to give me Valium when I was going through the hydro withdrawals so I don't know what would make him change his mind now. But we'll see. Either way, there are a bunch of herbal supplements I'm going to try just in case he falls through... I think Melissa Lemon (?) essential oil was one of them... Valerian root was another... there were like three more that I forgot the name of, but some people swear by them. It can't hurt to try. And if nothing else, then I have two Trams and 8 Vicodin that I can use to taper further if it gets too bad.

And before anyone asks, no I'm not worried about taking Vicodin. At least not so soon after getting off the Subs. I was off the Subs for about a month after having surgery and was on Norco, and all the Norco did was make me sick. I was actually disgusted by them after a while and requested the Trams instead because I couldn't stand taking the Norco. I think it's because there was still Sub in my system, idk. I'm just saying that 8 Vicodin 5/500's won't be a problem judging from past experiences, so no worries.

But... despite my fears, I really do feel confident about this. I mean, making it through the withdrawals. As much as I'd like to say "You're right- I'm a Marine, I should be able to make it through anything", the fact of the matter is that logic doesn't work in this situation. It's hard to explain... but in the Marines, the pain, the fear, etc. was for a good cause... and it was caused my external forces. This situation seems like one that's completely pointless and could have been avoided, not to mention that it was self imposed. It's easy to force yourself to get through something when you have a Drill Instructor or your platoon sergeant screaming in your ear to suck up the pain and deal with it, you're doing it for something other than yourself. It's not so easy when all you have is your own brain, trying it's hardest to convince you to just take one more... one more stupid fucking pill and all the pain will go away. At least for the moment. And really, it's hard NOT to get caught up in the moment when every second feels like an hour lol.

Wow that was a really demotivational speech I just gave myself. Seriously though, I am confident. Somewhat at least. My plan is to just take whatever herbal supplements and prescriptions I can get my hands on and do nothing but watch boring movies and play the Sims. I might be in a world of pain, but at least I can build sick houses for my Sims to live in. And I'll have my snowboard within eyesight the whole entire time for motivational purposes. And I'll have my puppy. And chili cheese fries. That's really all I need.

Oh, and I get where you're coming from when you say you don't trust people who say they're going to quit on this date or that date. The only reason for that is because I still need to get things in order that I'm going to need in order to be prepared. Like, I need to go to my doctor and get whatever prescriptions he's going to give me, give him a list of the supplements I plan on taking just to make sure everything's okay and that there won't be any weird interactions, and then of course I need to actually order said supplements and wait for them to come in the mail, which I can't do until the 1st because that's when my VA check comes in. Trust me, if I already had all of my prescriptions and herbal necessities in front of me and everything was all squared away, I'd see no reason why it shouldn't be today instead of the 8th. But as it is, I don't have everything I need yet, so... it's going to have to wait. Either way, I'm not complaining lol it just gives me more time to prepare mentally. & thanks for all the support guys :D
 
xburtonchic said:
the fact of the matter is that logic doesn't work in this situation. It's hard to explain... but in the Marines, the pain, the fear, etc. was for a good cause... and it was caused my external forces. This situation seems like one that's completely pointless and could have been avoided, not to mention that it was self imposed. It's easy to force yourself to get through something when you have a Drill Instructor or your platoon sergeant screaming in your ear to suck up the pain and deal with it, you're doing it for something other than yourself. It's not so easy when all you have is your own brain, trying it's hardest to convince you to just take one more... one more stupid fucking pill and all the pain will go away. At least for the moment. And really, it's hard NOT to get caught up in the moment when every second feels like an hour lol.
Click to expand...

I'd say that you getting off all these substances is a good cause don't you think? And your doctor forcing you to taper down would make it caused by external forces.

The situation could've been avoided, but now that it's inevitable, it doesn't make it pointless. Your marine situation could've been avoided, you could've not enlisted. Or if it was really that bad and unbearable, you could've just told them you were gay. To me it seems harder to actually suck up all the pain and jump over a 12 foot wall when all you had to eat was half an MRE, then just sit around all day and simply wait for all this shit to leave your system. I'm sure when you were goin thru basic you weren't constantly thinking about everything you'd have to deal with next week, or that you'd eventually have to dive head first into a war zone, and im sure if you said to your drill instructor you were stressin about the next 3 months or whatever, he wouldve told you the same thing, turn your attention to the task at hand and do it. You just need to keep that same mentality.

If you were keen on taking the easy way out, you would've done it in basic. This is the same thing, something you need to overcome. In terms of you just watching movies, playing the sims and eating cheese fries...I can tell you for me it wasn't that easy. I didn't wanna do ANYTHING, but when I would sit to watch tv, I couldn't concentrate for 30 seconds. I literally didnt want to do anything. So just keep that in mind. Also for the first few days, eating solids was out of the question. My diet consisted of apple sauce and soup, which I could barely even stomach.

You have the right idea with the valerian root, but any sort of relief you'd feel from it will be solely placebo. I'd recommend loperamide (since it acts as a partial opioid agonist which is absorbed through the stomach, not the brain), diphenhydramine is good to help you try and get to sleep, plus it does have some euphoric effects whichll make you feel a little better, I know you read in a different post of mine about kratom. It's not that hard to get, especially since your in Cali, but try and get the leaf, not the extract.

Next time you see your doc ask him about seroquel. And in terms of ordering Rx thru the Internet, a lot of it is bullshit, and it'll probly be a waste of your time. Us drug addicts are crafty, we can usually find a hook up for drugs one way or the other;) the most important thing is to keep a good mindset. And remember what I told you about your feet and the days of the week %)
 
lol... you know what I mean. Comparing making it through the Marine Corps to opiate withdrawal... well there is no comparison really. I mean the Marine Corps is more of a team effort, a bunch of people are doing the same things as you and you're working for a good cause that's OUTSIDE of yourself. Opiate addiction is a personal battle that you go through alone, and choosing to get off is another battle within itself... one you also go through alone. Idk it's just different somehow. Opiate withdrawal makes the Marine Corps look like preschool, in my opinion haha.

Like I said... it's easy to do when you have a Drill Instructor or a platoon sergeant screaming in your face to do what they tell you. Because you know if you don't, you can get a court martial. And might I remind you that one of the possible punishments for disobeying orders during wartime is the death sentence? It's pretty easy to listen to the things people tell you to do when you've been intimidated into doing it. Really, they should make D.I.'s for opiate withdrawal haha. Plus everyone said I couldn't make it through boot camp, and in the fleet I had more to prove since I'm a female, so half the reason I made it through the Marine Corps was out of pure stubbornness and the fact that I thrive off of proving people wrong. In opiate withdrawal, there are no Drill Instructors yelling at you. There's just you and your fucked up brain, which will be trying it's hardest to get you to give it what it wants.

What do you mean ordering Rx through the internet is bullshit? As in it's a rip off and I'll end up paying for something that will never actually come, or it's a set up and I'll get in trouble, or the product they give you is fake, or...? I've never tried it before so I'm not too sure what you mean. I just know when I was going through the hydro w/d's, the Valium I was given didn't do SHIT for me. So I doubt it's going to make any difference this time. Hopefully adding Valerian and that Melissa lemon tincture stuff will help, even if it IS just a placebo effect. That's better than nothing.

Oh, and about the Immodium. Is that available OTC? Because my doc refuses to Rx me ANYTHING that even remotely works as an opiate. Tramadol isn't even a freaking narcotic for crying out loud and he won't even give me that. And lol... I remember what opiate withdrawals are like... I know I won't be able to eat cheese fries :p or probably even play the Sims... I'm just trying to make light out of the situation somehow.
 
Lol..yea the immodium is OTC. Your docs reluctant to give you tramadol because people have abused it

When I usually hear of people ordering Rx thru the internet it either never comes, the quality is shit, or it's some sketchy black-market nonsense. None of which I wanna be involved in

Yea I guess I'm pretty ignorant when it comes to the whole military relating to opiate w.d thing, but I think that since your so stubborn you should be trying to prove to yourself that you can stay off it (since your so worried you won't :p)

I don't even know you, but I know you could do it

o and p.s. you'd probly have to do some serious shit in order to receive the death sentence for war crimes. I don't think they're gonna start givin lethal cocktails to someone who disobeyed an order
 
LOL how do you abuse Trams when they don't even get you high?! The one time I actually felt anything from them was when I combined them with Subs... and even then it was a very slight buzz, hardly noticeable... and not at all comparable to an opiate high. More like being slightly drunk. VERY slightly. Anyway my doctor is saying he won't give me Trams because they're a narcotic... and I keep telling him Tramadol is NOT A FREAKING NARCOTIC but he doesn't believe me. Facepalm. I'm going to have to bring in my pharmacy book that lists every medication under the sun and all their side effects and properties and put it under his nose next time I see him. I hate when people act like people outside of their respective professions don't know anything. Like fuck haven't you ever heard of independent research? You don't have to go to school to learn things! It happens more often in the medical field, I've noticed. Pharmacy techs, doctors, nurses, etc... a lot of them like to act like they know everything, when I know for a fact that some of the stuff they say is completely wrong. Like the time my friend (a pharmacy student who works IN a pharmacy) told me Vicodin was an opiate. I even showed her my book that said Vicodin is indeed an opiate... and her response? "Exactly, it's semi-synthetic." OMG. Facepalm again. Anyway, rant over.

I will indeed make it through Suboxone withdrawals. I'm just better at being stubborn when I'm trying to do something to prove somebody else wrong, haha. :P
 
Lol sometimes its best just to drop it. Are you really gonna start argue whether tramadols are a narcotic or not with your doctor? If you really disagree that strongly you can always start seeing another doc

And plenty of people do get fucked up off trams. Your right it's not like an opiate high tho

O and see that thing next to quote that says edit? That means you can just edit your original post without double posting ;)
 
Good work! You've made the decision, just don't ever quit now :) I've never had to deal with an addiction to any physically addictive drugs so I really have no idea what you're going to be dealing with. Actually, no, I quit cigarettes!

Exercise is an awesome stress reliever. As for writing your journal I think that's a great idea too, I can't recommend writing your thoughts down enough. Recognizing precisely what emotion you're feeling and what that's signalling has helped me a lot recently. I've heard that when you're kicking a drug habit the key is that you're doing it for yourself, and it sounds like you're doing that.

You'll get your life back. Being healthy is more valuable than any high. Let us know how it goes.
 
Good job! That's so amazing, I am so proud of you. I'm trying to quit, and it's being a week and a half since I've had any drugs and a month since I've had a cigarette and I want you to know that it's hard as hell, but totally doable. Make sure your friends are invested in helping you out, because when I first quit, I failed a lot because they kept offering me stuff. Please let us know how you're doing!
 
Well, I think my recovery just went out the window. I screwed up pretty badly today, so FML.

To the people that quit cigarettes... first of all, congratulations!! And second of all, how did you do it? Like, seriously. I have terrible will power, if you couldn't already deduce that from what I just said lol. I was planning on quitting soon and using Nicorette... but I ran out of cigarettes today and thought I'd chew some of the Nicorette to tide me over, and guess what? DIDN'T FREAKING WORK. I have no idea how I'm going to quit now since that is one thing I KNOW I won't be able to do cold turkey... not when the cravings are so intense (worse than opiate cravings, if that's even possible) and not when cigarettes are so legal and so readily available. So. I would love to know how you did it.

And Bo you've already experienced my stubbornness, you know at least this much about me. Come on now lol I'm not going to just drop it. When I'm right and I KNOW I'm right and someone is telling me otherwise, I am going to throw documents and books in their face until they admit that they are wrong and I am right. I cannot stand when people have false high and mighty attitudes and act like I don't know what I'm talking about when I know for a fact I do. I just want to show him my pharmacy book that says Trams aren't a narcotic. It's not as though I plan on starting a war with the man who ultimately controls my recovery. 8o But no I never said Trams don't get you high... I just said the high doesn't seem very addicting. Or to be more concise, I don't see WHY people would choose Trams when they could get the same, but stronger and better, effect from alcohol... which does not require a prescription and does not ultimately cost more in the long run than an addiction to prescription pills would. I also don't see how something that isn't even a narcotic could become physically addicting? Feel free to prove me wrong here with some facts and what not... after all, I have encountered people who were ignorant regarding opiates... so who knows maybe I'm just being ignorant. But I really just don't see it.

Oh and thanks lol I didn't know about the whole edit thing. Good to know for the future. :)
 
Wait a second I think I'm missing something. I just reread both our responses and it seems like you are arguing with me about something that I don't know I said (or perhaps missed a second time when I went back to read my post).

But even reading your first response I don't seem to see us disagreeing about anything. Unless you're waiting for an answer about the clonidine? If your blood pressure is usually superlow, then its not the most important thing in the world to take it. Although it still will help. But it helps a lot more for people who secrete a lot of adrenaline in wds (like me) and even when I taper I immediately go into stage 2 hypertension, so clonidine helps me a TON. If your blood pressure tests low though even while tapering chances are its not going to help like it helped me.

And did I say something about trams being a narcotic? Cause I don't remember that either. If I did I think I mean "non" narcotic lol. W/e the case trams definitely aren't narcotic as far I know.

But as far as choosing tram over alcohol OMG alcohol is horrible for wds. Have you tried each on their own while in wds yet? If you really need me to explain I will and I'll get into all the biochemistry too. But it will be a long explanation with several different reasons why tram would ABSOLUTELY be prefered over alcohol. And both are physically addictive, but I'd much rather come of tramadol than alcohol. Thats still not the reason I recommend it though as it takes forever to get addicted to alcohol I'm recommending it because of how it works in the brain, and how it alleviates wds w/out adding much of a backlash. Alcohol will mainly make you sleep through wds if you drink enough. But you will feel 1000times more worse once it wears off. Between free radicals, dehydration, depleted testosterone, and surged norepinphrine (adrenaline goes up when you come down off alcohol as your metabolism goes into overdrive to burn it out of your blood).

To the guy who said online prescriptions are a scam I'm not even getting into it. Keep thinking that cause I'd prefer them to myself anyway. If you know what you're doing you won't get scammed, its that simple. I've done it over 100 times w/out missing a single package but I also research this shit vicously and moreso I KNOW where to do the research. But I wasn't even talking about *those* places (overseas pharms will would be prohobited to talk about here). I'm talking about perfectly legitimate US online pharmacies. They are really no different than walkin pharmacies (except you get the script immediately online with no hassle at all) and you have the same exact chance of getting ripped off, none. You couldn't even possibly get ripped off as you just do a chargeback, so no chance in hell of that. Pharmacy would get shut down in one day and bye bye just like any other us pharm. He was talking about something different and a different scenario all together. Yet again I can't get into that scenario as the places he was thinking about are doing it illegal. Although even a ton of those are perfectly legit.

Anyway back on topic. Alcohol IS extremely physically addictive its just a much slower process for your body to get into (becoming physically dependent on alcohol). Main reasons why I would never touch it while coming off opiates is it always magnified my anxiety X100 which it does for A LOT of people. There was points I'd drink some, be drunk but still in wds, no ability to sleep at all, foggy headed and sweaty/dehydrated from the alcohol, then once it worn off I felt even worse. Someone hear mentioned the concept with using alcohol and its using very small amounts throughout the day while staying hydrated and drinking lots of water the whole time. You don't just get drunk though while in wds because trust me tons of people have done it and its just likely to make the wds more unbearable. As well a worsen any symptoms of depression.

Were are there any more questions or anything you want me to explain in depth/using facts? Goahead and ask specific questions cause I surely don't talk from my ass. I can back up what I say and do it both formally with research or nonformally with anecdotes, which ever you prefer lol. Just not sure if I was missing something and what it was exactly.
 
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^^shes talkin to me

nd burton, where are you getting this info that theyre not addicting? Just b.c it says it on a website or w.e doesn't necessarily mean you cant get hooked, especially if they have an opiate problem or are an addict.

and your really saying an alcohol addiction is better than an opiate addiction? ppl have died from alcohol w.d . nd about your doctor, he's dedicated basically his whole life to this type of shit i don't think he's gonna take kindly to some chick who brings in some paperwork trying to prove him wrong. but shit w.e do wat u gotta do

nd u shud look into those electric cigarettes, I heard they can be good b.c it still gives you the act of smoking
 
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So I'm nearing the end of day one and I can already feel the w/d's starting...
My lovely doctor forgot to send in the clonodine prescription when I saw him yesterday, so it looks like I'm going to have to go without that.

FUCK MY LIFE.

Time to go pop about 39048240934oq8349qa xanax.
 
What are you even talking about lol I never said alcohol addiction is better than opiate addiction. I'd choose opiate addiction over hard core alcohol addiction any day of the week. You can DIE from withdrawing from that shit. I was talking about using it sparingly as recreational use. I meant that Trams give a buzz similar to alcohol... so instead of taking a few Trams to get high, I don't see why someone wouldn't just drink alcohol instead. I didn't mean every single day.

I can't even make sense of life right now.
 
Hmm have you tried it yet? I mean honestly its just alcohol go try it. But I have seen tons of people come in the day after drinking alcohol for wds and they generally feel worse (although I HAVE seen one person do it on here and actually claim it helped). I've always felt worse though myself. At first you feel better, than you realize you still can't sleep and its wearing off and you feel even worse/foggy headed/alcohol stupor.

I hate recommending soma to people but its just as easy as tram to get and helps a ton with pain/sleep while in wds. I mean between soma and tram alone I was pretty decent in wds, just that I'm hypertensive and can't take tram too long.

Try things out man. No need to suffer. Just focus on not abusing and take what you need to feel better. Don't overdue it, focus on the goal (w/e it may be) and if you want it you'll get it.

Gluck
 
I haven't tried alcohol and don't plan on it. I'm extremely sensitive to getting hangovers and there is NO way in hell I'm going to deal with a hangover on top of opiate withdrawals.

I wish I had some Soma, but I don't know where to get it. :(

By the way... what does the clonodine do for withdrawals exactly? You seem to know a lot about that stuff. Are there any OTC/herbs/anything I can get my hands on easily that can replace it?
 
^^get some kratom, I had some wine while w.d and it definitely helped, but im not a big drinker

Also don't get your hopes up with the valerian, it has mild effects in someone whos sober, someone who's in w.d probly won't receive that much relief

Your best bets the Xanax and lope, also couldn't you always just call your doctor and ask him to fax over the Rx to the pharmacy? My doc has done that quite a few times for me it's not uncommon
 
Yeah I am going to call my doctor, only problem is that it usually takes him a few days to respond to the fax unless I'm physically there IN his office and he can write the prescription. So I'm not going to get my hopes up for the clonodine... at least, I'm not going to get my hopes up and assume I'm going to get it immediately.

I'll try to order some kratom online... and some kava kava.

Sigh... certain life situations are making this process SO much harder than it needs to be. Unnecessary stress and confusion and uncertainty is seriously the last thing I need right right now.
 
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