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IV Users.... Do you regret "picking up" the needle?

Aren't there any good stories with intravenous drug use? Not everyone suffers the horrors described in this thread; some of it sounding like stereotypes. I have no doubt that some IV users have suffered an awful hellish experience.

Nevertheless, there's gotta be people aplenty who fit Lacey's upper-middle class IV population, with resources, clean works, ready cash, clean records and college degrees-- wish more of them would step up

I already did. A surprisingly small number of people care to use micron filters though.
 
I agree man. I have always had to pay for my habit no one funded anything I did unless I conned it out of them or stole. I did go to college but I paid for that myself and it ended after 2 semesters when I went to jail for 6 months and got my 2nd felony when my house got raided for being a dope house and I had 7 80's in my pocket. And being so sick and with three people and one needle. I am lucky I am still clean with how many people I have shared with. And using needles that are bent and so dull you have to force it in and all it does is push you vein aside cuz its to dull to go in. Hell I have even used toilet water before because I was in a stall in a bar and there were too many people to get water from the sink. I have seen people take ditch water and boil it to shoot it. Its not a glamorous life but even though I know how sick of life it is, every time I stop I always end up back. I get clean at least once every year for either jail or rehab and get right back on when I get home. I went to rehab in Jan. and 56 days sober I got kicked out for shooting up during and N.A. meeting pass, I didn't go to the meeting but thats the only way to get out during the week. I am almost clean now cuz I'm out of state and in the country and can't find anything but I have pretty much tapered down using fent patches and percs but I can't wait to get back to florida and get some pills. Its a sick sick life. But I don't know if might never change.

I dont' understand how people can sink to using toilet water, gatorade or snow from the side of the road in order to make a shot. I do not understand either poster blaming using a needle for their screwed up choices and methods for using drugs, that is strictly on you, not the drug or the route of administration. To blame your unsanitary usage on being poor and then disparage the "upper middle class" user who actually purchases water to shoot their drugs with is just downright pathetic.

I have been banging dope on and off for a good 15 years. I never got anything from my family and have worked since I was 14 years old. Even during my worst days of addiction, I managed to maintain a job in order to pay for my habit, and when I was unemployed, my dope use would get restricted to a bare minimum and I would sell what I had in order to get what I needed, but I would never maintain a huge habit, unless I had the money to pay for that habit. It would not matter how sick I was, or where I was, I could always find, or wait to find a clean source of water and semi-sterile conditions to shoot up in. I would use a blunt needle, and it would hurt like hell, but I have never ever, and could never be desperate enough to consider some of the things that I have read.
i will never condemn anyone for using any drug and they can use it however they chose. In most countries there are a certain amount of risk that is inherent with any type of drug addiction due to our misguided criminal war on drug users, which treats mental illness as a criminal offense, but that is not the issue. The issue is, all drug users have to engage in some fairly risky behavior simply because the substance is illegal. This however does not provide one a free pass to blame all of their bad decisions and all of their problems on a drug, yes the drug makes some conduct almost impossible to avoid, but others, like using toilet water to shoot up, rest solely on the shoulders of the participant.

Does shooting make the addiction more intense, absolutely. It changes everything about your addiction, there is definitely an urgency present that was never there before and the sickness could have you praying for death rather than live another second with the unbearable pain and misery that WDs bring on. But the addiction does not change who you are at your core, you are always you, drugs just show you what you are capable of becoming. I have known otherwise good people who went to from living a farily decent life to being down and out in about 6 months. i have known other users who have maintained habits for years with no real ill effects, it comes down to who you are and what you are willing to do in order to get high. If you have enough money to cop dope you should have enough money to get a $1 bottle of water, or hey maybe find a public restroom that has a sink? Better yet, wait until you get home, what a novel concept. I hate being all sanctimonious, but I hate people blaming all of their problems on their addiction or the drug, the truth is you probably had a lot of problems with self control long before you started using a needle, so maybe you want to examine your self a bit better and stop blaming the drug.
 
Listen yo.

You apparently got clean not too long ago and started goin to NA.

That is great for you and its good that you can see your life was out of control and did somethin about it.

It dont give you the right to talk down to other people and get up in people face with this fuckin attitude I been seein you have lately. I seen it a million times. Addict gets clean and then all a sudden , they get the know it all attitude and they know better than everyone and everyone who disagrees is a moron.

Its mad disrespectful to people to act that way. you can have a different opinion without straight up dismissin any and everybody who is different than you and didnt have the same experience.

Im one of the people who is more leaning towards "hey, you say you good now, but it fucks everybody up eventually the majority of people who do it." So i agree MORE with you in theory than with Microtel.

but your attitude and way of sayin it is so rude and disrespectful and so know-it-all smug that i cant even quote you and co sign it becuz that way of acting is just as bad as the anti drug people who think they know everything about drugs.

You had a dope addiction and went thru all these things. not everybody will. And as much as i know that in the end just about everybody who goes far enough to start bootin on the regular is gonna end up strung the fuck out, i also know that there is people out there who can and do use recreationally without much problems. I use to think you were a OK poster but this attitude change since you got clean is really puttin me off and makin me think way less of you. For real, the smug shit got to go. you dont know everybody, you dont know their life, and you dont know the shit they will or wont do. Your experience is your experience, stop tryin to judge others and tell them they are stupid just becuz they aint the same as you are and aint got the same beliefs. It aint a good look for anybody....Much less somebody who was so lowdown and dirty one day and the next day is Mr High and Fuckin Mighty preaching to the people he use to get high with about how bad drugs are.

fuck dude i wanna get high all the fuckin time i aint tryin to act all high and mighty yo. I was just saying find me a succsesful dope shooter. The post just threw me off like i can see if someone is rich as fuck and dont gotta worry about scammin to get off but it dont happen often.

Im just speakin from my experience and what ive seen. I got one friend that maybe can shoot dope once a week but for how long? Like u said its a matter of time. I did come at u kinda hard in that thread and i apologize... its just from me being on the done and havin same attitutude and seeing countless others and every outcome the same i just had to say what i thought. The way i saw it was u shittin on the program like ur opinion was fact. My bad, prob not the case. And i aint high and mighty im a dopefiend just like u.. AA not NA.. na sketchy round here.. i apologize for comin off however i did.
 
To add:
Eric Clapton
Anthony Kiedis
Slash
Nikki Sixx
And I'm sure there are a lot more

You ever read Nikki Sixx book? He got the best dope and coke in the world had all the bitches all the fame and ended up locked in a closet everynight tweakin with a shotgun miserable as fuck. Even if you got the means the shit sucks. Lacey will tell u obsession over a fuckin drug is god awful.

Dope shootin stars who died- Sid Vicious, Jim morrison, Bradley nowell, John beluschi, river phoenix, DJ am, janis joplin, kurt cobain, ODB, pimp C, heath ledger list can go on and on
 
Dub I think in general you good peoples. I think that you will lose the attitude as you been clean for longer. I see it a LOT in people who are newly clean. (or relatively new, it might be even 6 months or a year, etc) but they get clean and they tend to go harder on people than even the anti-drug folks do. There aint nothing worse than a self righteous junkie who is off drugs. I dont think you tryna do it and i dont think u realize that u doing it, its just somethin that tends to happen to some people when they get clena and do a complete 180, they do the "I was a drug addict and this happened to me and its gonna happen to you and you think you know but you dont kid! just wait and see, youll find out eventually!' and so on.

The thing is alot of the times the shit is for the most part pretty much true in general. I always tell people who do the whole "i got it under control" thing , yo just wait, give it a year or 2, youll go down eventually if you think you on top of it....SO i understand where u coming from but its the certain ways of saying it that comes off as havin a high n mighty attitude. I think you might look back on some of ur posts from this period a few yrs from now and be like "damn, i sure was cocky as hell"...Im just sayin that while ur hearts in the right place ur delivery is a little bit selfsatisfied, u feel me? Over time that should kind of fade away. Im just gonna make one sugestion--Humility, and humbling yourself, is a important part of your program and one of the things that i do agree with in it. give that some consideration and try and apply it when you speak. A tone of humility is the difference betwen people takin your advice and thinkin about it, or rejecting it and dismissin it without even givin it consideration becuz they think you are a smug douche. Not that you are but the attitude of the newly clean junkie who finally 'sees the light' can be one that really turns off the people who aint there yet and if you truly want to share with people your success and help them get there to you should present it in a way that can appeal to everyone instead of make them feel bad about them self and feel like u judgin them. aint sayin you do that just warning that its a territory u seem to be a little bit close to and u can avoid it by humbling yourself a little.

anyways, .I understand where ur comin from and like i said, i agree that the people who can do this shit successfully is pretty few n far between. But they do exist tho, no matter how much we might not believe it, becuz the people who able to do that is the ones that you dont hear about and you dont even know they do it becuz they got it on lock like that. u feel me.

Now, if u on some once a week shit i can pretty much guarantee its gonna end up goin down hill. But , IME ,especially people who HAVE been thru addiction, there is some of them who are able to successfully go back to usin once in a while without havin no problems with it. I am one example but i was on methadone so some people might not consider that fair, but my boyfriend is a great example. He got detoxed in 60 days from methadone and that was it, and then used from time to time, not quite once a month a little less than that, for a good amoun of time. He wasnt on methadone, sub, nothing, dont even smoke weed or drink. just picked up the dope for a day every so often , got booted, and then forgot about it for another month n a half or 2 months. he had no problems with it, and no issues controlling it, n cravings, no desire to use more or do it again for another day in a row, etc.

I think actually, for the people who are addicts who do go back to using successfully, its actually EASIER for them to keep it cool and not fall back into bad habits, becuz the ygot something to compare it to. New users who never been that road before, will do the occasional use thing, the once a week or once every 2 wks or watever their schedule is, and they will have it under control for a while, but they aint been addicted before so they a, dont reconize addict behavior and thoughts creepin in when they show up, and b, they aint got no incentive of something that they know they never wanna go back to. They dont know that addiction aint fun and it sucks and ruins all the fun of the high and you dont even enjoy it no more.

people who been thru that ,got verry good reason to keep it on lock and not fuck up. the incentive is much higher, and the ability to control is better i think, becuz they got out of the addiction and was able to kick it and get clean, and that takes a whole lot of willpower and strenth and determination and discipline. so they are familiar with being strick with themself. you get a certain amount of self will and control by goin thru and getting free of an addiction and those skills make it much easier to keep it cool and not go overboard when you use recreationally after gettin clean.
but on the other hand the ones who never been thru that, its like they got no idea where they heading, and its much easier to get lost. for me or any of the junkies on here its known territory. we know the drill, we know how it goes and how it works, we know wat to do wat not to do, its easy shit. but for the new users its all un charted waters, they dont know shit . they dont realize that doin certain things is bad or will lead them to a worse place. they dont see the signs or know the shit to avoid or noting like that u feel me.

its like a person who has drove on a really dangerous road before and had an accident on it, vs a person who never drove that road before. you might think the person who had been on it and crashed would do a worse job of driving on it again, that they would be better off to avoid it completely and just never drive on it again becuz that shit happened there and it might fuck with them, upset them, make them suck at driving from nervousness at bein on the same raod that they crashed on before.

but in reality, they been thru it, they know all the twists n turns, the bad spots, and becuz they did crash they know how to be careful the second time around and not make the same mistake twice. the new driver dont know wtf he is doin and is more likely to screw up cuz he never done it before and dont know how dangerous it really is u fell me? hope that makes sense....
 
nope dont regret it, woulda spent rest off liefe wondering wat i was missin(in know thats a big cliche)

but then im also in the stage when i just quit, and was always more addicted to the substances, not the needle
 
Yes in hindsight. At the time it seemed to be just a natural progression in my drug using , but as i have come 2 learn there is nothing natural about injecting yourself with hard drugs.
Also it is a very difficult habit 2 break i have gone up 2 8 months without picking up a spike but something always tricks me into thinking it is ok.
 
I think once you pick the needle up, it is allmost impossible to go back to smoking /snorting your heroin. I also think giving up heroin is made several times harder if you iv it , as theres far more of a ritual involved. I dont think anyone can seriously say they dont regret picking up the habit. allthough imo you havent "truly" experienced drugs , untill you have iv'd some good quality H.
 
How about a credible reliable web link to these micron filters?? (as a demonstration of harm reduction) thnx in advance

Micron Filtering Mega Thread and FAQ

all the information you need is in there, including where to buy micron filters.

I think once you pick the needle up, it is allmost impossible to go back to smoking /snorting your heroin. I also think giving up heroin is made several times harder if you iv it , as theres far more of a ritual involved. I dont think anyone can seriously say they dont regret picking up the habit. allthough imo you havent "truly" experienced drugs , untill you have iv'd some good quality H.

I preferred snorting heroin.
 
You ever read Nikki Sixx book? He got the best dope and coke in the world had all the bitches all the fame and ended up locked in a closet everynight tweakin with a shotgun miserable as fuck. Even if you got the means the shit sucks. Lacey will tell u obsession over a fuckin drug is god awful.

Dope shootin stars who died- Sid Vicious, Jim morrison, Bradley nowell, John beluschi, river phoenix, DJ am, janis joplin, kurt cobain, ODB, pimp C, heath ledger list can go on and on

I've read that book 5 times... Haha.
It's the reason I won't go near a needle.
Yea the list is redic. Ray charles, shit a lot of jazz/blues musicians...

C.H., I'm curious did you ever say to yourself that you'd never shoot? Or were you scared of needles at one point?
 
I know I'm not him, but I have a TERRIBLE fear of needles. Like, have refused things I needed that required an IV, shot, or blood drawn. It still hasn't gone away. I get the same fear every single time. I've shot many times in a day, tried a bunch of pokes to register, I really hate that shit sometimes...Also, told myself I would never shoot, because of the fear of needles. Sometimes you want to take a risk though, or something.

I also continue to ingest drugs in other forms after hitting the needle. Maybe it's my fear of needles that makes me do it, but sometimes I just want to eat my OC, or smoke my H. It is the most incredible feeling in the world, but I don't really want that ALL the time. Sometimes I actually like my drugs to last a while also...:P
 
worst decision i ever made. it changes your life, forever. the places it will take you, oh my. heroin + insulin syringe = homelessness and possibly death.
 
i dont rerget starting to slam at all, but it kind of ruined ever other roa for me. If im not shooting it i just feel like im wasting so much
 
For me the needle, preparation and all the shit that goes along is at least half the addiction. I won't even use a drug if I can't fit it into a needle anymore. Its def a horrible thing and spun my life out of control very quickly. I picked up the needle at a pretty young age and now I see all the damage its done but I still can't let go of it. It sucks and rocks at the same time. However, I do wish I'd have never picked it up in the first place.
 
hahahahaha. Maybe they started off with that ..... but it will all be gone within the year. I went to a private catholic school played sports all around good kid. 2 years im shootin speedballs of crack and heroin in the hood with a dirty rig homeless. There are no good stories with IV drug use whether you have 1 penny or a billion dollars. Look at fucking famous ppl who shoot dope... THEY DIE. That was the most retarded post i ever read.

I've been shootin' up daily for 6 years and I'm in med school now. Yeah, I wish I could stop so I wouldn't be so broke, but the idea that drugs=failure is not always true. Do opiates fuck people's lives up? ABSOLUTELY. But, if you think that's the only reason your shit turns bad, then you're essentially denying all responsibility for your own poor choices.
"Don't blame the drugs, dude."
 
I've read that book 5 times... Haha.
It's the reason I won't go near a needle.
Yea the list is redic. Ray charles, shit a lot of jazz/blues musicians...

C.H., I'm curious did you ever say to yourself that you'd never shoot? Or were you scared of needles at one point?

Its deff a love/hate thing with me.....did say i would never shoot.. never scared of the needle tho
 
Yeah i do . In a way i almost feel lucky in comparison 2 what some of my pals have been through (loss of limbs and all that shit) i try not 2 use the pin anymore as i've had DVT in the past and i think you are trebling the risk when you iv H as opposed 2 smoking it, but damn i miss that rush !
 
I've been shootin' up daily for 6 years and I'm in med school now. Yeah, I wish I could stop so I wouldn't be so broke, but the idea that drugs=failure is not always true. Do opiates fuck people's lives up? ABSOLUTELY. But, if you think that's the only reason your shit turns bad, then you're essentially denying all responsibility for your own poor choices.
"Don't blame the drugs, dude."

I would hardly call that kind of thing as typical for IV opiate users. I would even argue that you are an exception that largely proves the rule.
 
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