the "better" it gets, the worse it is for your life. but there's no stopping you. that's how good it is. Through a lot of "trial and error"..(well, some near fatal OD's and a lot of rehab, outpatient programs, losing all sanity, huge HUGE financial debts, tearing about my family and friendships, and girlfriend relationships, dropping out of school, not being able to hold a job, let a lone get one, waking up in mexican jails, waking up in alleyways, muggings, doing the mugging, sharing needles with random strangers, ODing, flatlining in the ER twice, then waking up in the hospital 3 days later.. rehab again... pure hell and agony, pure mental cripplage, high strung manic anxiety, feeling like a stranger in my own mind/body, being afraid of everyone...getting clean, getting a job, then finally learning moderation (cause i really cant stop).....all i can say is SHIT..i am so glad i dont use on a daily basis anymore.. and i actually try to stay away from hardcore opiates and slamming shit now. though i THINK i have the power for moderation of hard opiates and slamming now. I seriously think i may be in the 10% that blahblahblah was talking about... it took A LOT of fucking follys though. and i dont want to under emphasize that one bit. i wouldnt wish what i have gone through to my worst of enemies.. not even to Hitler or fucking Stalin..he fucking killed more Jews 10 times over than Hitler..and it was his own people... that fucker...
anyways...good luck to anyone and everyone who might end up "falling in"
It's not a game. You will either always understand this, or you will learn it the fucked up way.
Moderation is 100 times more rewarding anyways.. You get to keep a normal and satisfying life...with the tacked on "i get to feel fucking amazing a few times a week"... and you always have money.
It's nicer this way.
Sorry for going a bit off topic if you think i did.
Yeah heroin is good.
But it's not good enough to be more important than your life..or having a good life. It will constantly try to trick you into this, and inevidable succeed if you dont keep your guard of rationality up.
It's just a high..no matter how fucking wonderful it is. it's not "worth it, worth it" if you know what i mean. It's the ultimate release for many. But a release is all it is. Stop running. Stay the fuck put and deal with life. Then have your sweet release in your spare time.

peace in the middle east