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Introduce Yourself! v.2.0

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Hello all. Making my 1st post in tds, probably where ill be doing much of my posting here as lately ive been sick from alcoholic dts more often than im well or drunk. Im also goin thru severe anxiety as the new doc is godamn benzophobic, the only drugs that work 4 me besides the drink. Id like to smack the bastard when i see him friday if i even go. Cheers.
 
Try for low abuse potential barbs to help out with your detox such as phenobarbital. Will help reduce your seizure risk.
Also welcome to TDS :) where the grass is greener, cleaner, and a lot more serene-er...
 
Id like to call myself a hope dealer these days. I slang that fire hope all day and night and wanna help some of these people become "dopeless hopefiends" instead of hopeless dope fiends. My life is owed to this forum so i wanna return the favor and help others who are going through tough times. I dont have much free time but i do my best to stay on top of this thread so the newbies feel welcome and stick around :) love everyone here at TDS. <3
 
Humor and laughter keeps my soul warm, my heart smiling, and brings calmness and serenity to an otherwise chaotic life. As long as i can laugh and smile i will be okay and hopefully getting others to do the same.
For the newbies: i am 9 1/2 months clean from all drugs (doc was IV heroin), working steps in NA, full time student, and living a recovert oriented life in which i am happy. And i owe it to TDS as in late december of 2011 i wanted to end it all. But this forum and its loving community helped me push on and begin living life again instead of just surviving.
Once again, love all of you (all of US i guess could be said) and wish you all the best. Life is phenomenal, fun, interesting, and so rewarding once things start getting better (they always do). Keep your head up, your back straight with good posture and confidence, and an open mind and heart and things will turn around for those struggling. <3 <3
 
Serotonin101 said:
Humor and laughter keeps my soul warm, my heart smiling, and brings calmness and serenity to an otherwise chaotic life. As long as i can laugh and smile i will be okay and hopefully getting others to do the same.
For the newbies: i am 9 1/2 months clean from all drugs (doc was IV heroin), working steps in NA, full time student, and living a recovert oriented life in which i am happy. And i owe it to TDS as in late december of 2011 i wanted to end it all. But this forum and its loving community helped me push on and begin living life again instead of just surviving.
Once again, love all of you (all of US i guess could be said) and wish you all the best. Life is phenomenal, fun, interesting, and so rewarding once things start getting better (they always do). Keep your head up, your back straight with good posture and confidence, and an open mind and heart and things will turn around for those struggling. <3 <3
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Wait wait werent you high on dxm like a month ago you said when posting hitting on some girl here?
 
Nah i havent used. I was sick and im sensitive to the effects of dxm. Had a summer flu so i was taking the max dose on the bottle along with benadryl for my insomnia and some valerian root. Made for some interesting nights though.

Edit: i adhere to the NA basic text where it mentions using medications in times of illness. Using only minimum dosage and have a trusted individual (my parents who are aware of my addictiom) administer the medication (vicks honey cough syrup). I understand where youre coming from. I think this subject is covered in "more will be revealed" chapter in the Basic Text.
 
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And serotonin101 that benodryl will screw u up I've done that 6 times and my vision is screwed from it and things will morph
 
Hi my name is 'DrugFuckedNZ' and I'm a groove-a-holic junkie extraordinaire! Bluelight is my face book without the lame 'I just had a banana for lunch' status updates, when I see those updates I want then to put that banana where the sun don't shine lol. Be safe and remember....oh shit forgot what I was gonna say but it would have been funny, corny or just dumb.
See ya on the down side of up BL peeps :))
 
Guess what, i had a banana with lunch today :P. Ive cut down on otc sleep aids since then (more melatonin and valerian instead of dph). Welcome all you new faces :) hope you feel warm and welcome here.
 
Anyone here ever do vyvanse the stuff will get me high then I'm up all night that's 24 hours duration and I'm prescribed quantipine
 
Hi guys I thought i would join here, lately I've experienced some bad Dep! really bad, had some support workers visit. I see Doc tomorrow maybe go on Anti D not sure of his treatment plan, now again that scares me to, but hell can it be worse than very deep depression/anxiety?. I am on methadone, and i hope the doc gives me the right med, scared of course i will feel sicker, and well fk me up more, how i get past these thoughts?, I don't want to go up in my methadone dose, contrary to what theories are out there saying it helps, about increasing and it acting as anti D been there tried that methadone isn't an Anti D but can calm a bit. Many Years ago i tried a few for short periods with no success, I have to try find the energy in me to beat this black dog and persist with the medication. I just hope it doesn't make me any worse guess i just have to trust! Thanks 8(
 
Hi, DarkRift here, first time posting on bluelight though I been reading through different posts and articles here for some time. I'm a pothead and speed junkie (though I have do e just about everything in the book since the age of 16). Anyways, I'm glad to be apart of bluelight and thought I should finally make some kind of introduction to my fellow bluelighters.
 
Hydrobenz here again, had a short break out of My control. I've spent since high school doing alcohol or some drug. 55 year old male from Florida. Both parents and step dad alcoholics, so was bound to see that as the norm.
I moved as a child all the damn time, went to 14 different schools in 12 years , so never had a stable world back than.
I've drank, smoked, snorted, popped most of the old school stuff. No RCs.
Raised three great Children that are 33, 26, and 24 and managed to keep them in a lot better place than I was than.
Still dealing with a hydrocodone monkey but low dose maintenance world right now.
I hope to be of some help to someone who could use a old school out look on life.
I've already have had some wonderful advise given to Me, so never to old to learn. Thanks for reading, Peace, and be damn careful, life really passes fast the older You get.
And in closing, I know it's hard to believe now but some things that seem so earth shattering now, and so dark are really just one of life's mind F**ks and will be small dark days forgotten if You can pass the test. All things do get better with a few more years. Peace.
 
Can anyone help me out/give me some advice for my life? I've been stuck in a deep dark rut for too long and I feel like it's never going to get better. I'm 22 about to be 23 on november 7th and I feel like I haven't done shit with my life. As a kid I was never given support from my parents nor brothers so basically I've always been on my own through life's up's and down's and through all this was and has always been moderate to HEAVY drug use. I wont go into specifics of what drugs exactly but basically its been anything I can get my hands on. Lately I'm plagued by crystal meth (smoking it being my preferred method) I got hooked on it a lil over a year ago and now it's all I think about and spend my money on. I am a very hard worker and take work seriously but I'm sick of working my ass off just to see paycheck after paycheck going just as quickly as I got it so I can buy more meth. I'm sick and tired of being broke and I'm currently trying to quit smoking this shit but somedays I don't have the strength to hold back and tell myself I don't need this in my life to be happy or satisfied with things or people around me.
But truth is crystal was one of thee first and only drugs that ever made me feel like I should (alive, awake, attention always at high alert and that feeling like I never wanna come down because I wish I could feel like this all the time..) but when I don't have it and go a couple days without it I fiend for it and the ever repeating images of what I crave flash through my mind rapidly and constantly until I break down and buy some more starting the whole cycle ALL OVER AGAIN! I'm trying my hardest to break this habit so I can become something in life and so I can be proud of who I am and my occupation without having to have drugs run my life. I feel lost right now and need to get out of this ever-going dark rut...
 
@Methodonia--I hope that you get somewhere with your doctor. Depression is a cruel state to live in. I think trying different SSRIs may be worthwhile but are you also doing any kind of therapy? Lots of times depression's roots can be explored and dealt with n other ways--harder maybe than a drug, but with only benefits and no downsides or side effects. Much love coming your way.<3

@Hydrobenz--glad you are back! :) Sorry I haven't answered your PM yet--I've been away from BL a few days.

@Darkrift-- I think that you are going to have to get off meth, probably with the support of a group (it's pretty impossible to sustain on your own) and then you can tackle the other issues. Remember, when you say that it made you feel like you "should"--alive, awake, aware etc--those are intensely heightened states that you are now feeling are normal. Eating well, sleeping well and feeling in control of your life will give you all those benefits but not as intensely as you might have become conditioned to. If you want control of your life, first get it away from meth and then be very patient with yourself while you learn how to function optimally sober. And, be kind to yourself. 23 is young--you sound like you have a lot going for you--independence, pride in your work, seeking more in life--those are all great traits!<3
 
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