Back to my old self again now i wake with the notion that its actually worth getting up. even though nothing has changed i think im just adapting to the stress. either way i can rationalise depression again and force it away. i guess these issues wont ever go away so ill just learn to endure and be happy regardless. its just kinda hard when youre not sure what makes you happy other than a substance to distract me for a moment.
If you can adapt to the stress and rationalise the depression...thats really quite good. it is sooo hard to endure. I haven't found the secret on how to do any of those things on a consistent basis. I truly beleive I must do a complete personality/character overhaul in order not to abuse substances or engage in certain behaviours.
I used to say this to my friends and family when I couldn't or wouldn't stop using. "you can't change a dog into a cat and vice versa" I am what I am. Born this way. Mind is permanetly altered.
But for the sake of life itself. I am going to try dammit!!! I don't even know what the outcome will be. Success? Failure? (again) or perhaps a blend of the two.
I hope you stay on your straight path,consistenly moving forward at whatever pace u choose.
Hey! maybe thats good advice fer myself!
I used to say this to my friends and family when I couldn't or wouldn't stop using. "you can't change a dog into a cat and vice versa" I am what I am. Born this way. Mind is permanetly altered.
But for the sake of life itself. I am going to try dammit!!! I don't even know what the outcome will be. Success? Failure? (again) or perhaps a blend of the two.
I hope you stay on your straight path,consistenly moving forward at whatever pace u choose.
Hey! maybe thats good advice fer myself!
