Whipped Dream
Bluelighter
First off, I LOVE this forum. It's hard to talk to "normal" family/friends about my anxiety issues and drugs without getting that "look" and then a ridiculous suggestion that maybe I need to get a hobby or go to church or some stupid shit.
I'll try to bullet-point my issues as much as possible so as to not bore you all to tears.
MY SYMPTOMS:
- Severe anxiety in social settings (work parties, family reunions, etc) - to the point of extreme sweating, shortness of breath.
- Severe anxiety due to work related stress - to the point of tightness in the chest, and a desire to hit something or somebody (hasn't happened yet thank God).
- Mild anxiety in a variety of other situations.
Just recently I've attempted to address my anxiety with borrowed drugs. I refuse to drink alcohol - my dad is an alcoholic - I don't want that for myself. I have a very high tolerance to most drugs so I need to take a high dosage for anything to take effect. The following is a list of meds I've tried:
MEDS TRIED
- Lortab (borrowed) 10/500. I found two of these cured my anxiety beautifully, with no negative effects - no ataxia nor drowsiness, just a very effective arrest of anxiety.
- Lortab (prescribed) 10/325. Miracle cure for my acute anxiety. I could use it at work as well as any other situation. My supervisor was well aware of my prescription and was cool with it. My wife encourages me to use it because I am much more pleasant to be around when on the stuff.
- Doc also pushed Fluoxetine on me but that shit sent me into a deep depression.
- For fear of building a tolerance to Lortab, I went off Lortab in order to try Benzos. I tried Xanax, but that shit knocks me OUT COLD. Recently was prescribed 10mg Valium, but I have to pop three of those little guys just to even feel any effect -- which is usually only very mild muscle relaxation for about an hour.
Bottom line is even though Hydrocodone isn't typically used for anxiety, it works VERY well for me, whereas Benzos work more effectively as a potent tranquilizer. I can't be sleeping at work, and I can't even drive while on Xanax.
So....now what? I have a year's supply of Valium that isn't very effective. I probably won't even renew the script. I refuse to go on an SSRI. What else might work well for me?
Thanks to all for any input/constructive critism, and I apologize if I have disclosed too much.
I'll try to bullet-point my issues as much as possible so as to not bore you all to tears.
MY SYMPTOMS:
- Severe anxiety in social settings (work parties, family reunions, etc) - to the point of extreme sweating, shortness of breath.
- Severe anxiety due to work related stress - to the point of tightness in the chest, and a desire to hit something or somebody (hasn't happened yet thank God).
- Mild anxiety in a variety of other situations.
Just recently I've attempted to address my anxiety with borrowed drugs. I refuse to drink alcohol - my dad is an alcoholic - I don't want that for myself. I have a very high tolerance to most drugs so I need to take a high dosage for anything to take effect. The following is a list of meds I've tried:
MEDS TRIED
- Lortab (borrowed) 10/500. I found two of these cured my anxiety beautifully, with no negative effects - no ataxia nor drowsiness, just a very effective arrest of anxiety.
- Lortab (prescribed) 10/325. Miracle cure for my acute anxiety. I could use it at work as well as any other situation. My supervisor was well aware of my prescription and was cool with it. My wife encourages me to use it because I am much more pleasant to be around when on the stuff.
- Doc also pushed Fluoxetine on me but that shit sent me into a deep depression.
- For fear of building a tolerance to Lortab, I went off Lortab in order to try Benzos. I tried Xanax, but that shit knocks me OUT COLD. Recently was prescribed 10mg Valium, but I have to pop three of those little guys just to even feel any effect -- which is usually only very mild muscle relaxation for about an hour.
Bottom line is even though Hydrocodone isn't typically used for anxiety, it works VERY well for me, whereas Benzos work more effectively as a potent tranquilizer. I can't be sleeping at work, and I can't even drive while on Xanax.
So....now what? I have a year's supply of Valium that isn't very effective. I probably won't even renew the script. I refuse to go on an SSRI. What else might work well for me?
Thanks to all for any input/constructive critism, and I apologize if I have disclosed too much.
