• H&R Moderators: VerbalTruist | cdin | Lil'LinaptkSix

I'ld like to hear from anyone who uses an opioid to fight depression.

I first started my serious opioid journey in high-school by being "involuntarily ejected" from a vehicle during a high-speed rollover car crash on the highway. Car flipped 4 times, I got thrown through the passenger's window on the 3rd role. They doped me up GOOD for the 10 days I was hospitalized (broken shoulder, head injury and concussion, whiplash injuries, and MANY "safety" glass lacerations across my face and chest). I was honestly quite lucky to not have any brain damage or injuries which wouldn't heal. I was on hydrocodone for about a month after discharge during recovery (probably on either Hydromorphone or Morphine while inpatient, my memory of the stay is VERY hazy).

I then got my wisdom teeth out a few years later, in 2 session. If the car wreck painkillers cocked my trigger, this pulled it. I quickly went from being correctly prescribed hydrocodone, to purposely exacerbating a mild lung infection to get "Hydrocodone" cough syrup and mixing that syrup directly into pino grigeo wine. Spent years playing w/ every opioid I could get my hands on and gaming pain doctor's into prescribing me drugs I didn't actually need. It didn't help that I was literally studying/interning to be a pharmacist and knew EXACTLY what Dr's wrote the best opioid RXs in my area. I got big into snorting subutex after sampling everything else, mostly because Bupe isn't as tightly regulated or watched in the US and I didn't want to make it too obvious when I helped myself to clinical drugs occasionally. Eventually I DID get arrested for diverting multiple 500mg bottles of Ketamine after many years in this feild.

I had to quit basically ALL my prescribed drugs after being in jail and entering a court ordered diversion program. I lost my license to practice and my state's board of pharmacy was absolutely NOT sympathetic. I was drug tested and generally (mostly) clean for YEARS. Plus, I was forced to attend NA which varies heavily from group to group. Some are ultra religious like a cult while other's are a bit more chill. I eventually relapsed, first snorting subutex again, then quickly graduated to H for a couple years.

Eventually I got help from a suboxone clinic, something I had seriously avoided previously since seeking any drug treatment looks REALLY bad as a pharmacist. I was on that for awhile and noticed that, even though it no longer has any psychoactive effect whatsoever, it definitely helps my underlying depression and anxiety.

I've been on the same 8mg suboxone dose for 7 years now, mostly just as a mood stabilizer. My primary care dr, who writes that script, is fine with it indefinitely. As is my psych who finally got me back on my adderall after years without it (at a reasonable dose). Coming off ativan was honestly worse than any opioid though. I HAVE also developed mild functional alcoholism in the past few years, usually 1 large mixed drink QPM, as a result of recent PTSD (survived a mass shooting/standoff as a "hostage" and then shot a mugger in the same year). But the Suboxone as a mood-stabilizer/anti-depressants thing is absolutely valid. There were studies many decades ago about methadone's use as an anti-depressant. My experiences with methadone were less than satisfactory, IME. But yeah, opioid maintenance drugs work pretty well for depression, definitely better than the questionable clinical results for SSRIs.
 
@datadyne - Thanks for sharing your experiences and insights. How different your life might have been had that car crash never happened. Fate really dealt you a hard hand to play. I'm glad you survived and seem to be stabilized now on Suboxone. I hope the career you studied so hard for will be secure going forward. Thanks especially for your insights regarding how opioid maintenance drugs can be therapeutic for depressives.
 
Hi @DesertHarp!

From what it sounds you’re opioid dependent, not addicted.
Addiction is where you chase the high and are constantly increasing the dose cause of tolerance.
You generally seem to be using your prescription more often than not properly.

I’m guessing you’re in the US as you get hydrocodone (Vicodin).
You should look in to kratom, it’s legal in the majority of the US and has opioid effects from two of the chemicals in it.
Just don’t push your tolerance to the point where your hydrocodone doesn’t work anymore.

Also you should get some black seed oil, it’s fantastic stuff that not only reduces opioid tolerance but helps opioid withdrawal and cravings, it also works for stimulants too and has research backing it up.
I use it about 15 mins before I dose to help me feel whatever opioid I’m taking more.

Try the black seed oil first and then maybe the kratom.
They’re both cheap. 👍
 
Hi @DesertHarp!

From what it sounds you’re opioid dependent, not addicted.
Addiction is where you chase the high and are constantly increasing the dose cause of tolerance.
You generally seem to be using your prescription more often than not properly.

I’m guessing you’re in the US as you get hydrocodone (Vicodin).
You should look in to kratom, it’s legal in the majority of the US and has opioid effects from two of the chemicals in it.
Just don’t push your tolerance to the point where your hydrocodone doesn’t work anymore.

Also you should get some black seed oil, it’s fantastic stuff that not only reduces opioid tolerance but helps opioid withdrawal and cravings, it also works for stimulants too and has research backing it up.
I use it about 15 mins before I dose to help me feel whatever opioid I’m taking more.

Try the black seed oil first and thenI'll loo maybe the kratom.
They’re both cheap. 👍
Thanks for your explanation. It seems I would be in the dependent category.

I have tried Kratom. I was put off by how much of it has to be swallowed to get an effect. I'll look into the black seed oil.

Right now I'm having a day of hangover from a cannibis edible I took last night. It was vastly more potent that ones I tried previously. I didn't know they can vary that much in concentration. I'm learning. I appreciate what I learn from the responses of others to my thread.
 
You can buy it in capsule form. No need to drink a ton of kratom infusion.
Yes, I have the capsules. I don't gave a problem swallowing, but it does take a lot of capsules to get enough of a dose to maybe do anything. If I ran out of hydrocodone ahead of schedule and was in withdrawal, I'ld start swallowing plenty of Kratom capsules. That would motivate me because restless legs from withdrawing is torture for me. I haven't been in that fix in a while.
 
Yeah, I definitely have used opiates for depression for the past few years. I typically will take (don't laugh) 1.25 mg of oxy, 2.5 mg vicodin, or half a tramadol. I take it only a half dozen times a month because I have a very limited supply and no way to get more at present, so it's more of an as-needed thing. It's just enough to give me a little change of consciousness and it helps for a few hours. I wouldn't mind doing bigger doses and getting a nice strong euphoria going, like I did in my youth, but I want it to last and I don't have a supply of pharma drugs, and don't want to take my chances with probable fentanyl content. I'd probably kill myself! Anyhow, low dosing also minimizes hangovers, and hangovers= worse depression in my experience. It's like walking a tightrope to control myself, though.

PS This is my first post here ever, so pardon me if I'm doing it wrong!
 
Yeah, I definitely have used opiates for depression for the past few years. I typically will take (don't laugh) 1.25 mg of oxy, 2.5 mg vicodin, or half a tramadol. I take it only a half dozen times a month because I have a very limited supply and no way to get more at present, so it's more of an as-needed thing. It's just enough to give me a little change of consciousness and it helps for a few hours. I wouldn't mind doing bigger doses and getting a nice strong euphoria going, like I did in my youth, but I want it to last and I don't have a supply of pharma drugs, and don't want to take my chances with probable fentanyl content. I'd probably kill myself! Anyhow, low dosing also minimizes hangovers, and hangovers= worse depression in my experience. It's like walking a tightrope to control myself, though.

PS This is my first post here ever, so pardon me if I'm doing it wrong!

No, you've got the right idea. Thanks for posting. I believe what you're doing is called micro-dosing. It's great that you get at least some relief from a very small amount of opioid. After years of being on Vicodin, my tolerance is such that I need 20 mg of hydrocodone to feel any lift in my mood. As with you, my supply is so limited that I have to ration it out. I just take 10 mg twice a day. Otherwise I run out before the month is up, and then I withdraw . . . which is not pleasant.

I agree that street supplied drugs are too dangerous. I've never tried to buy any. A friend of mine used to give me some of his Vicodin. But he passed away, so I make do with just my own prescription. It's not enough for me to experience any euphoria. I've been trying out various cannabis gummies. I fail to get any recreational value out of those. THC will put me to sleep, but it provides me zero joy. Plus, it gives me hangovers. Alcohol used to help sometimes, but not anymore. I have a stomach ulcer that is apt to bleed, if I have more than 2 drinks, so I just have one glass of wine with dinner.

I'm depressed right now. There seems to be no escape from that . . . until it just runs its course and blows over.
 
I wonder if anyone else here finds that using an opioid relieves depression.
Opioids have been used since time immemorial to treat depression and that very successfully (before the modern term depression was coined it was simply referred to as melancholy). This is why they are illegal for such use. The system wants people to be continuously stressed and depressed.
Anyone from Paracelsus to the legendary persian Medicus himself praised Opium for its antidepressant medical value.

I have once told my story in another thread a long time ago, how opioids have literally saved me from committing suicide. I had such a bad case of major depressive disorder that I eventually started to develop a rare symptom known as "mutism". I literally hadn't had enough energy to open my mouth and speak to people. I was lying all day long in my bed, curtains closed, not doing anything, eating once every couple of days and just vegetating and waiting to finally die.
The only medication that ever helped me were opioids and they haven't lost that effect to this day (chronic user since 12 years).
They also make me very affectionate, almost in a cheesy way, towards people which I like because I'm normally very cold-hearted when I'm sober. They enhance my creativity and kick my motivation into overdrive. I suggest you to read the book "Opioids in Mental Illness: Theories, Clinical Observations, and Treatment Possibilities" if you are interested in how this substance class can be used to treat mental illnesses. Opioids are much better than all that tricyclical and SSRI crap which only tends to worsen depression over time and comes with a ton of side effects and adverse health consequences.
 
. . effects and adverse health consequences.

and they are the most benign. they probably have to be controlled because of the addictive affect. like everything else. But, harmful. No they are magical. From Opium.

the good stuff always gets controlled in my opinion. it's a fine resource. and with mental health support it could be wonderful. Because what doesn't require time, education and a lot of work. very good research and positive information.

i just wanted to say it isn't much of a commodity anymore. and it's tough to acquire somehow for some reason that I don't know but maybe for when they kill the rest of us off. as in

depopulation. yes it is getting very sad out there. and depressing. i appreciate your awareness of the situation. Dr Hart Phd said a lot too. Sorry, but he did mention being

intelligent and thinking it being able to use your own brain through comprehension abilities to be able to use it, I like his research and book basics Drug use for Grown-Ups. It's too

easy to comprehend but it is too governed and regulated for some reason . he probably could have left politics out but that is how they find agendas for the narrative that is the current norm and part of the this and. . . . that of opioids are addictive . . . . Duh so is alcohol cigarettes and especially high fructose corn syrup. prolly a diversion or supply

and demand part of the equation like population control and a new world order. any way it's nice to be able to think freely or at least for making my own decision and having my own abilities to think and choose for myself. And it could just be the simple situation of supply and demand. And if that was true then I was right up there on the tip of the

curve now on the way down from peak opium. Where did it all go. I don't know maybe chandler got it.
there has to be some damn poppy fields somewhere; the least dangerous of all drugs now a days along with MM. only in my opinion however . . . . it's a PLANT i'm pretty sure. the human condition though is the last ingredient that makes it about greed and control and makes it the extreme lethalness that is what takes precedence.
ffs.
rant over. too emotional for it all.


oh yes, and it most likely could have saved lives because then people wouldn't have had to look for other things that will rapidly deteriorate and end their lives instead. Especially, of course, relating to health issues !!

that's the problem: It is way Too PUre. oh and clean. and non adulterated. it's wrong. remember when weed ffs was going to make you insane and jump off of a roof. well that is what was being said. alcohol was made illegal during prohibition . . . . .but yet everybody was drinking it. .. . . and bootlegging from a clandestine still and again getting killed. wut.

i can't rant about this anymore because it will just kill me too. Opium is too pure but yet fentanyl kills. MmmmOkay. help me. just . . .

anyway it's all lies . . .

sorry okay now i am really done.

Sry. I just really get absurd. I advocate for opium. The other good stuff.

But, however, it could be propaganda you know or supply and demand. Or it could have been a little bit of everything until the conditions were right to abhor it.

Demonize and twist the truth . . . . to then somethings that just aren't quite better. the other pharmaceuticals I am just on a rant and can't believe what is happening and really is true.

I am going to start growing my own poppies now. So there you go. It's just a plant. Or a Plant. 'control the food and control the people.' Sorry can I just rant this one more time.

I love your intelligent approach to the whole situation. Try. Stay Safe. thumbs up. the bestest always !!

And yes I will keep thinking through the issue of opium. However, I will make my decision for myself and my own situations, at this point now after everything that I had to go through and entail because opioids are bad and everything else is just . . . well alright. Just balance, strength and support. I have to use meditation now to get me through because nothing else is helping right now but to meditate. Somehow.

T/y.

and <3
 
@kiely
The elites want the drugs for themselves while everyone else shall be in misery. Euphoria for me but not for thee!

"[...]Rothschild, and other clans "put in regular orders" with a local pharmacy "for opium, heroin,and cocaine."
Source
 
@kiely
The elites want the drugs for themselves while everyone else shall be in misery. Euphoria for me but not for thee!

"[...]Rothschild, and other clans "put in regular orders" with a local pharmacy "for opium, heroin,and cocaine."
Source
I know and then insult us all. Like pulling the next 'elite card.'

At times it gets very infuriating and insulting. It's uncalled for. And is despicable.

Some days though. :rolleyes:

I appreciate the source. Much thanks. <3
 
Low dose opioids helps my depression/ boredom. But as you have already discovered the addiction part can ruin the experience. No way around that except to keep your tolerance down by minimization. Maybe change medications.
 
If your ever using alone, protect yourself with a spotter. Our operators will ask you for your exact location, type of substance that is planned to be used, and how your taking your supply. If during the course of the call if you stop responding, we will get you help either through your predetermined responder or by notifying your local emergency services. Call 1-800-972-0590 for stigma free spotting 24 hours a day.
 
Low dose opioids helps my depression/ boredom. But as you have already discovered the addiction part can ruin the experience. No way around that except to keep your tolerance down by minimization. Maybe change medications.
It actually turned out that the issue I had (avolition) was not due to tolerance but chronically low T-levels which can mimick symptoms of depression, but I solved it by taking ultra low dose naltrexone (see previous pages) which stimulates the production of sex hormones and gets rid of almost all side effects that are known to occur with both acute and chronic use of opioids.
 
If your ever using alone, protect yourself with a spotter. Our operators will ask you for your exact location, type of substance that is planned to be used, and how your taking your supply. If during the course of the call if you stop responding, we will get you help either through your predetermined responder or by notifying your local emergency services. Call 1-800-972-0590 for stigma free spotting 24 hours a day.
Why would a drug user, who is possessing something illegal, willingly give that information to someone they don't know?
 
Why would a drug user, who is possessing something illegal, willingly give that information to someone they don't know?
Excellent question. We're a group of harm reductionists, people who also use drugs, and people with living experience just trying to keep people alive. We are not reporting to any government agencies. We can hand out all the narcan we want, but if no one is there to push the plunger, people are still dying. This is a solution to the lack of safe consumption sites.
A few years ago, I used a hotline just like this, and my overdose was reversed. I wouldn't be here without it.

My Story
 
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