Hindsight from a 20 year old
Hey guys, long time reader, first time writer, but this has always been a subject that i've considered long and hard about, considering the circumstances i grew up in. Excuse the length, i tend to waffle on when i write what's on my mind, but here's my take on things...
It all started back when i was eighteen and first started smoking weed. I personally didn't see any interest in it before hand, and when offered a pipe, smoked it and enjoyed it. Since then, i smoke it recreationally as a fun past time(it should also be noted that i'm from Adelaide, Australia, where finding weed is as simple as asking your neighbour...i.e. it is everywhere! it's even legal to grow one plant in your backyard, providing it's not hydroponic).
One day i was smoking up with a couple mates in my back shed when my dad walked in on us. Initially i froze, thinking my dad was going to blow a fuse, but then i realised a smile on his face, and sat down and joined us in our peaceful pipe ceremony.
The thought of my dad just joining in so casually stayed on my mind for a couple days after, until we went hiking the week later, and, not being able to hold it in no more, talked to him about it...
Summing up the conversation, he told me how back when he was a teenager, he used to get with his mates and smoke up once a week while listening to music and having some of the best times ever, and for him to walk in and tell me off for smoking weed would of been hypocritical on his behalf. He then went on to say "if i told you not to think of a banana right now, more obvious then not, the first thing your going to think of is a banana...so if i were to stand here and tell you not to smoke weed and how bad it is, naturally, what's the first thing your going to go and do?" Besides, he said that he could've done the stereotypical "yell my lungs out at you, ground you, take away your car and give you the silent treatment for a month, but in the end of the day, if you want to smoke with your mates, your just going to do it and no amount of discipline would have changed your mind otherwise"
Since then, we've had many good nights me and dad, putting on a couple of movies, a bag of doritos, and laughed our heads off at the stupidest things. He knows he can trust me to do the right thing with drugs, and i know now that if i need to talk to him about anything, he's always there to talk to, basically, it really has made the relationship between me and my dad stronger, more so now that i see him as a mate, not just a father figure.
Furthermore, it feels great knowing that you have one of the coolest parents on earth (according to my friends anyway, who every now and then join in with my dad to smoke weed)
However, there is only one thing my dad has ever asked, and that is my younger brother (who is 16) remains completely oblivious to the whole thing until he turns 18, as he reckons 18 is the perfect year, considering you are out of school, and mentally, you are more mature and ready to make your own decisions in life.
Whether my dad would have reacted differently if he caught me smoking at, let's say...12 - 15 years old, is anyones guess, probably more negative, considering his opinions on my younger brother, however, i know from what i've expierienced in my last couple years, when i eventually have children, i hope to follow in the same footsteps with my sons/daughters as my dad has unto me.
once again, sorry for the long post, but i hope that brings some insight to any worried parents, taken from a 20 year old's perspective.