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I want a child...what about you?

Jabberwocky

Frumious Bandersnatch
Joined
Nov 3, 1999
Messages
1,297
Location
Looking-Glass Land
So, I want a baby. A child...to teach and love and nurture.

I'm not in any sort of steady relationship, am 5 years off of being done with my PHD...am not even dating a girl now! But, yet, a present desire and urge is to have a child...

I imagine myself outside in the grass playing with him (for some reason a boy is what I imagine). Laughing, tickling, playing...

Walking around with him on my shoulders, he is pointing out a bird in the tree branches now...giggling...he calls at it to come over and play... <3

I actually imagine myself adopting at some point (granted my future partner is in agreement with that). There are just too many babies that need mothers and fathers to create more. We're all connected! It would be ours just like a genetically linked baby would be mine! We are all connected on a genetic level and an even deeper fundamental level (connected with love).

It makes me brim over with euphoria to think about it. I can't really grasp how amazingly profound the experience of teaching a human being from such an early age would be...a blessing to be able to care for another like that.

Do you want a child?
 
you know, you don't need to wait for a wife to give a home and a life to a child. why wait :) depending on where you live and your financial status, you could always adopt right now.

not to be melodramatic, but there are kids without a bed to sleep on, a father who cares and loves them is all they need.

p.s. i love how much love you have for your future little you :)
 
well its not real practical right now for me to adopt. I have 15k student loans, still have 5 years of school left (at least I won't have to take out any more loans and will be paid from here on out to go to school), still want to travel around a few spots in the world (southern france, morocco, australia, japan, new zealand, mexico, chile), and also still like to wile out on lots of drugs and such.

but yeah, its something thats incredibly exciting for me to think about...it will be a joy for the day to come when I get to hold my kid in my arms :)
 
I wrote this in the thread titled, "Is not wanting kids just a phase, typically?" I shortened it and edited it a little.



I really want to raise a life, not just because its what you are supposed to do or any of that bullshit thinking or anti thinking. I know this world is fucked up and I'm ready for the machine to swallow us up at any time. We don't live in a Utopian society and many of us will never even come close to seeing that. Most other animals mate no matter what, but humans have the choice on whether or not we want to continue to bring life onto this planet. I also recognize that manifesting art, new concepts, and ideas is another form of our hand in creation. Which is another beautiful way to be of service to our planet. However, I want to do as much as possible to help my species not eat it and as well as creating art and bringing in new modes of thinking I also feel compelled to take on the challenge of helping to bring an inspired and conscious being into this world.

I do have some stipulations for having children though. First is community--I live in Orange County and can't even walk out of my house without someone rolling by in a destructo gas guzzling SUV with bright ass fucking lights who looks at me and judges me based on my appearance. This place drives me absolutely crazy and I plan to fly the coop some day soon, but for now this is my home and I'm trying to make the best of it. But I certainly don't want any children I bring into this world to have to start dealing with the absurdity of this culture before they have the emotional tools necessary. We live in an extremely overstimulating environment and all early childhood development theories point out that too much stimulation too early causes damages unseen. I'm not implying that I want to raise my kid in a secluded forest in a commune where midwifes will rub my belly for days on end and keep them there until they are 18, but I at least want some semblance of peace and privacy and to have a common thread of respect and reverence for individuality running through my community. I imagine taking my children out into the world to experience all things, including things that I don't personally ascribe to.

Secondly) is of course my own health and emotional maturity, which at this point I haven't fully taken responsibility for and I acknowledge the fact that I have a lot of work to do. Third) Finally I have found a loving and responsible partner who wants to have children some day and we both agree on how we'd want to raise them, where, and when. I hope that I have many more years and happy days with this man if we choose to go down that path together. We try to be extremely conscious and intentional with our actions regarding procreation.

I do not just want to be a mama. I want to be a very strong woman with a deeply committed partner who say what the fuck the most important thing about raising our children together is to raise strong and conscious individuals who are not afraid to be themselves!! Lets give a damn in a world so full of drones and machines ready to break you down and digest your parts at any moment that most humans born today are fed directly into the mouth of the beast without their parents even realizing it. Just being a good person and raising good people is not enough. I'd rather see warriors like myself raising children rather than cynically backing away into our intelligent well read corners and letting the herd continue the cycle of enslavement. I may sound idealistic to some, but I know I have the power and the choice to manifest this future for myself and my offspring.

I sometimes have dreams where I'm pregnant or I see the face of my children. Eeeep! Its so awesome. :) When I fantasize about them I think of teaching them all the things I know about the natural world and the beauty around and inside of us. <3

P.S. Check out dolphin midwives :)
 
darthmom, I hear you very clearly, I do. My heart breaks for all the little ones out there without a home :(

I want to be the kind of man that will be able to take care of some. I will be that man! Thanks for the warm feelings darthmom, love to you for caring <3 :)
 
jaymie said:
the most important thing about raising our children together is to raise strong and conscious individuals who are not afraid to be themselves!!
YES!! Totally. I had a very heartfelt discussion with my father a couple days ago about mine (and my three brothers') childhoods. This is the second time in the last few months we talked about this (the first was with my mother also and ended with all of us crying in happiness).

We went back over memories we both shared about my life and how he tried to raise us. He is an artist and I think he instilled that creative drive in me and my other brothers. My parent's overall plan with us was to give us as much free, unstructured play time as possible (how counter to the way so many of my other peers were raised). I have at any time to sit back and reflect upon my childhood and cannot help but smile because it was so good...so much time spent with my brothers exploring in the creeks around our house (out in the country), making trails and forts in the woods, camping, fishing, climbing trees, PLAYING!

While we were talking I caught the afternoon sun gliding down through the living room windows lighting upon the tears building in his eyes. I can tell it has completely fulfilled him to have raised us and he is so proud of what we are and what we are doing in our life. This is a man who is a very well-known artist in the area he works in...but he says that his artwork pales in comparison to the feeling he gets as being a father. And this man has been DEEP in the midst of extremely intense creative projects!

Anyways, I'm rambling :)

It should be such a journey to be a parent. Life is so beautifully stunning to me I cannot describe really in words how deep my euphoria runs.
 
I would hate to have a child. They are annoying, stupid, helpless, messy, smelly, irritating, and tiny.
 
the greatest and most rewarding challenge ive conquered in life has been parenthood. if you ever want to experience the true meaning of ego loss, fuck lsd; become a parent.

its the most selfless and giving lifestyle anyone can encounter. its amazing what it does to the soul. its magical really; and difficult to put into words. ive learned more about myself, my life partner and daughter in the past 7 years of parenthood than what i ever did in 21 years walking the earth solo; my fiance would also agree.

i remember saying to my mother around 4 years into parenthood, why the fuck didnt you tell me how difficult yet awesome this would be? and she laughed and said "darling, noone can put into words the trials and tribulations of parenthood and even if they could; you wouldnt have listened. its one of those things we've all gotta do. hold your breath, jump into the deep end; and enjoy the ride."

thats the best way i too can describe it.

its awesome that youre yearning for that s_s; and have also considered the notion of adoption; we too have thrown around the idea over the past two years as we'd love to have another baby, but prefer the idea of opening our lives and home to a child in need of a loving family.

best wishes mate and hope to hear of a little s_s' presence in the late future when the time is right for you. the world needs more fantastic parents and figure heads. <3

...kytnism...:|
 
Bob Loblaw said:
I would hate to have a child. They are annoying, stupid, helpless, messy, smelly, irritating, and tiny.
So says the person that once was one!!


I love kids. I have two of them myself :D
 
samadhi_smiles said:
darthmom, I hear you very clearly, I do. My heart breaks for all the little ones out there without a home :(

I want to be the kind of man that will be able to take care of some. I will be that man! Thanks for the warm feelings darthmom, love to you for caring <3 :)
after i reread what i posted it was if i was saying you need to do it or you are awful for not choosing that path. that isn't what i meant. i would have a house full if i was that altruistic. i commend you for choosing the right time to bring a child into your home <3
 
scratch that, I think I'll wait till I figure out how relationships work and in addition to that, another ten years
 
I love kiddos... I have a 4 year old daughter and she is the light of my light and the star in the Heavens that I look to when I look in the sky. She is my life and although I did not mean to get pregnant, I did, and am so glad. I want another badly. I would NOT be the same if I didn't have a kid. :)

I will forever be changed by my pride and joy and am so thankful for the chance to be a mother when I almost miscarried her. :)
 
I'll admit...sometimes. Then the scenarios come, and not a single one is good; if I were lucky, I'd get by with mere insanity by the time the kid entered grade school. For those well-adjusted individuals who can hack it, I have nothing but respect.

So a very firm "no" for now, but anything can happen.
 
Damn... I wish I could quote what kytnism said about ego loss. So so so true.

And its such a wonderful thing to be young and live a little (and get it all out of your system ;) ) before you are responsible for another little life. Just think of all the things that you will learn between then and now that you will be able to pass on to your children. You will be able to concentrate fully on your kids because you will never feel like you "missed out" on anything.
 
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