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  • TDS Moderators: AlphaMethylPhenyl | paranoid android

TDS I Just Need To Post vs Welcome To the Fluffy Side

I just made chicken and pasillo enchiladas and the most colorful salad I have ever seen. Who ever heard of baby purple spinach? Not me before today at the farmer's market. The salad had red, yellow and orange peppers, purple spinach green arugula, avocado, carrots and green onions. Yum.
 
Sounds delicious. :) I just made a salad too, but it's my standard... salad bar stuff, variety of greens including some purple ones, bacon bits, goat cheese, sunflower seeds, raisins, cranberries, onions, 3 cheese balsamic dressing, and of course lots of croutons (essential to a salad IMO).
 
This has to be one of my dogs hell spawns.. don't get me wrong my dog is the absolute shit, but for the first eleven years he was one calamity after another.. He was an absolute mess.. im not even kidding. Id bet these two share lineage.

IMG_8918.jpg
 
AWWWWWWW. He is an adorable mess, then.<3 Our "canine calamity" was part Welsh Corgi and part over-sized Austalian Shepard. He looked a little like Lassie with no legs and the poor guy was arthritic from about 3 on. He lived 16 years though and saw my boys through boyhood. The last year of his life we kept his spirits up by taking him through the drive-through at Burger King and buying him a hamburger every Friday.=D
 
"I only talk to people who talk to me first"

I admit I'm losing faith in humanity with too many people following this plastic philosophy, although it lets you filter out a lot of shitcunts who don't have the 20 seconds of motivation who willingly talk to you. Ironically always say these things while they're glued onto a laptop or phone. These levels of apathy, idk, it's disgusting and liberating at the same time. But overall disappointing watching my generation fall apart from being hyper-connected 24/7, everyone's brains are rewiring to focus more and more on themselves and it just sucks.

People don't knock on doors to let you know they've arrived. They text. That's even if you get a text though. No one really calls to ask how you're going anymore, they just wanna catch up when it conveniences them. I only know a few people who remember what it was like to arrange plans a few days or a week in the future. It's depressing how "I don't give a fuck about anyone but myself" everyone is now and how completely against my identity and personality as a fucking human it is. I'm a little tired of always caring about others and getting fuck all emotion or even conversation in return. But yeah. What can you do?


Drive off into paradise.


2 weeks.


I just needed to get that out, write it down somewhere. Its just the Sunday night sadness coming out.


2 weeks.
 
^yeah, angeleyes, I would have to agree about the focus on "me" that results from the all the selfie, Facebook, image-driven mania of our current social constructs. I have worked with little kids (5-12 years old) for over 30 years and there has been such a change in that un-selfconciousness that is a hallmark of childhood. It seems every year, kids are more and more hooked in to societal ideals that divide them from themselves before they have even had a chance to experience themselves.

Still, I use my 85 year old mom as my guide to staying human and staying happy. She always found great people wherever we moved (and we moved a lot!) from racist little back-waters of the south to big and seemingly impersonal urban centers all over the world. I realized when I got older that the reason she had such authentic relationships with people, and drew people to her, is that she was herself authentic and she just plain liked people and looked for the good in them. When you do that, people show you their goodness. When you are judgmental they do the opposite and hide behind all the posturing and ego-driven behaviors. So, stay true to yourself and keep being one to fight the insidious rise of screen-selves out there.<3

And what happens in 2 weeks?;)
 
Thanks for posting herby I honestly wasn't expecting anyone to read that but your reply was nice :) appreciated <3

I'm moving back interstate :) driving back to happiness, 1000km away from drama and shenanigans, it also turns out it might be as soon as next week, which is exciting and scary at the same time. A lot better today though. Happy days!
 
Lars Andersen's archery just... knocks my fucking socks off. Makes me want to get into archery. A lot.
 
Love this song ATM

My lover's got humour
She's the giggle at a funeral
Knows everybody's disapproval
I should've worshipped her sooner

If the heavens ever did speak
She's the last true mouthpiece
Every Sunday's getting more bleak
A fresh poison each week

'We were born sick, ' you heard them say it

My Church offers no absolutes
She tells me, 'Worship in the bedroom.'
The only heaven I'll be sent to
Is when I'm alone with you—

I was born sick,
But I love it
Command me to be well
Amen. Amen. Amen. Amen.

[Chorus 2x:]
Take me to church
I'll worship like a dog at the shrine of your lies
I'll tell you my sins and you can sharpen your knife
Offer me that deathless death
Good God, let me give you my life

If I'm a pagan of the good times
My lover's the sunlight
To keep the Goddess on my side
She demands a sacrifice

Drain the whole sea
Get something shiny
Something meaty for the main course
That's a fine looking high horse
What you got in the stable?
We've a lot of starving faithful

That looks tasty
That looks plenty
This is hungry work

[Chorus 2x:]
Take me to church
I'll worship like a dog at the shrine of your lies
I'll tell you my sins so you can sharpen your knife
Offer me my deathless death
Good God, let me give you my life

No Masters or Kings
When the Ritual begins
There is no sweeter innocence than our gentle sin

In the madness and soil of that sad earthly scene
Only then I am Human
Only then I am Clean
Amen. Amen. Amen. Amen.

[Chorus 2x:]
Take me to church
I'll worship like a dog at the shrine of your lies
I'll tell you my sins and you can sharpen your knife
Offer me that deathless death
Good God, let me give you my life
 
Hi, not too bad I don't think! Clean of opiates and benzos again (relapsed on gear after getting off my diazepam script), about a month now or something. Almost totally stopped drinking as well which isn't even a chore at the moment, I just have zero desire to drink really and when I do I have like two beers and don't want any more. Very weird tbh. No drug use at all really other than still smoking cannabis and don't intend on stopping at the moment.

Perhaps just as pertinently I'm feeling relatively stable mentally at the moment. After a lot of deliberation I started on citalopram about six weeks ago with much scepticism tbh. Looking back it definitely made me much worse for a few weeks which was exasperated by relapsing but now I'm on an even keel again and it seems to have kicked in and I've had a couple of weeks feeling really good and now I'm kind of not exactly great but I feel kind of stable or content or it's hard to explain but there's something going on where I'm just feeling less shaky psychologically even if I'm over the honey period after it kicked in and started having a positive effect. Still waiting for surgery on my shoulder and becoming increasingly angry about it!


tl:dr...yeah not so bad actually for once, feeling positive. How have you been?
 
Good to hear your doing well:D

. After a lot of deliberation I started on citalopram about six weeks ago with much scepticism tbh. Looking back it definitely made me much worse for a few weeks which
Click to expand...

SSRI take a few weeks to work.. they create a state in the brain that causes the brain to adjust. When the brain adjusts then you receive the desired benefits. It takes about two weeks and until it does it can be pretty unpleasant.

I'm doing pretty good. Still stuck in limbo as far as moving and job. This is kinda taxing. Have not seen the girl I was for awhile now.. but i'm kinda hesitant to try and work on something with any new women in this area.. as i'm out.. so i guess im just up on fucking blocks until liftoff. Its getting old though as i'm ready to go and have been for awhile.
 
Where are you moving to/changing job? I've totally missed the boat on that one I'm afraid you'll have to enlighten me.

Knew the SSRI might make me a bit funnny before it made me better but it seemed to do nothing at all for a while so it kind of shook me a bit when it made me bad. I'm happy with the effect it seems to be having now though, which I have to say I'm suprised about. Was very sceptical about whether it would help and starting even if it would.
 
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