• The Dark Side 💕 Welcome Guest 💕
    Posting Rules Bluelight Rules
    Notable Threads Urgent Hotlines
    Bereavement Mindfulness
    Suicide Support Anger Management
  • TDS Moderators: AlphaMethylPhenyl | paranoid android

TDS I Just Need To Post vs Welcome To the Fluffy Side

I'm going to my twice monthly therapy/drug counseling session in an hour. It used to be weekly but I dropped every other week because honestly I'm not sure I need it. I started it right after I took ibogaine as drug counseling, but it's moved on to other topics mostly as she doesn't seem to think I display any characteristics of an opiate addict, though we definitely talked about it extensively for a few weeks. I like her a lot, and I like talking to her, and she thought the ibogaine story was fascinating and thinks that using psychedelics responsibly for personal growth can be a wonderful thing. I'm gonna keep going for now as my insurance covers all but a $20 copay. Even so I could use an extra $40 a month, and I really feel like most of what I get out of it is just an outside perspective. I figure stuff out throughout the weeks on my own, and then tell her about it and she pretty much agrees with me. I've only been at it for 3 months though, so we'll see. I feel well-adjusted, happy and healthy, but then again I did already, I was just scared of my brain given my history of relapses and my mom really wanted me to start going to drug counseling.
 
I just took my kitten for a walk ^^ She is 9 months old, and I'd like to get her used to going for walks, as I don't want her out of my sight if she is outdoors. I would never want to lose her!!
lyASFMO.jpg


Her name is Nritya-Chandra Parvati. I shall break down the meaning behind it...

"Nritya" which is Sanskrit for an interpretive storytelling style of dance,
"Chandra" which is Sanskrit for moon.
"Parvati" which is the name of the Hindu goddess, counterpart of Shiva. Also the name of one of my favourite Psytrance record labels :)

I just call her my Little Squeaker though ^^ <3
 
So adorable! ! Ugh! Sucks i can't have a pet in our apt!! I gotta look for apts that allow pets tbh. Im set to move in with bf in nov so this is something i shouldn't forget to consider when gettin one for us.
 
Got my kitty (one of them( snuggling on me right now. He is the same sort of Stripey coloring as these two cats, very very similar look (I capitalized because his name is Stripey as a result. Also, he's huge, 16 pounds without being chubby).
 
^^I could not agree more--cats put the soul in a house! Those two are beauties. There is a guy in my neighborhood that walks his big gigantic siamese on a leash like a dog. He said he got him used to it as a kitten. My cats are free roaming but I wish they weren't. I want to make an enclosure so that they can still leave the house on their own but they will be confined to my yard only. I lost my best Buddy to a coyote when I went to South America. If it isn't coyotes, in this neighborhood, its cars.:(
 
Yeah I don't let my cats run free, and I really, really want to, I feel bad, but there are coyotes, bears, foxes, neighborhood dogs that hate cats, and cars here. And stray cats (and my cats HATE other cats, it's crazy). Plus when I was experimenting with letting them out my female cat ate every plant in sight, threw up pink foam, and got sick.
 
So I have noticed for the last few weeks that every Monday sucks, I feel down and exhausted, and every Tuesday I still feel exhausted but emotionally much better, but still slightly down. Then Wednesday through Sunday are amazing. I see a pattern, and it's obvious it's because every weekend I'm staying up super late and taking psychedelics one day of the weekend and drinking some other night(s)... going to shows, dancing, river hiking, etc. And then during the week I'm sleeping and eating well and recovering. Well... duh. 8) But I'm not sure I want to give up how I'm living my life, until the summer is over and it's time to focus on other things for a while. This summer has been one of the best of my life, and I have some more great stuff to do (the highlight: going to the Lock'n festival, a 4-day music festival, my first one and I've wanted to go to one since I was 18, it's coming up in 2.5 weeks). Sometimes you just have to life to the fullest, and although it's somewhat unhealthy at least to be going so hard, I'm not doing anything I have any shame over. I'm not addicted to drugs, I'm extremely happy and fulfilled (except for Mondays and Tuesdays I guess), and I think I deserve it after all I've been through in the past few years and all the progress I've made since then.
 
herbavore said:
^^I could not agree more--cats put the soul in a house! Those two are beauties. There is a guy in my neighborhood that walks his big gigantic siamese on a leash like a dog. He said he got him used to it as a kitten. My cats are free roaming but I wish they weren't. I want to make an enclosure so that they can still leave the house on their own but they will be confined to my yard only. I lost my best Buddy to a coyote when I went to South America. If it isn't coyotes, in this neighborhood, its cars.:(
Click to expand...

Aw I forgot to follow up but Buddy never came home :(.

Xorkoth said:
Yeah I don't let my cats run free, and I really, really want to, I feel bad, but there are coyotes, bears, foxes, neighborhood dogs that hate cats, and cars here. And stray cats (and my cats HATE other cats, it's crazy). Plus when I was experimenting with letting them out my female cat ate every plant in sight, threw up pink foam, and got sick.
Click to expand...

My boyfriend did not want a cat when I brought ours home but he's since fallen in love with our cat. I tend to freak out on the cat more than he does. He actually doesn't get mad at the cat at all. He thinks it's hilarious too. I believe our cat may have been imbred. It drives me insane. Anytime I lean over the bathroom counter the cat jumps at the exact time and pays absolutely no attention to how close it's jumping and literally almost breaks my nose every time it at least hits me in the face every time. It's an oddly forgiving cat though and loves to cuddle. I have to admit I have chased it around the house screaming (not sure the reason I think it may have jumped on the counter and started eating spaghetti out of the pot) among many other things it does to make me freak out. But she doesn't stay mad.

NSFW:

This is Evve being crazy Evve on her cat bed my parents gave her for christmas:
10516664_10152225517791398_5373152786516292937_n.jpg


And Regal Evve in Belle's bed (dangerous territory):
4zONqDG.jpg


And this picture of Lito one of our 3 Papillons because lol:
dZgZOrs.jpg
 
I gotta post pics of my new kitten! moving in has been crazy so stay tuned :D I'm still getting settled in.
 
@Xorkoth i think i have pasr that part where Monday gets me down. I just need a vacay!!!!
 
I love to eat hummus with naan bread, or carrots... Apples are also super yummy with hummus.
Argh now I'm craving hummus!! aha, better that than other things I could be craving I guess :P

I've only ever made my own homemade hummus twice, i didnt have a proper blender though, so it turned out chunky but was still really good. Man, I gotta learn to prepare food... *sigh*
 
You must log in or register to reply here.
Top