Its seems like we all see that day on this side of things, Especially us who try to cover our pain with the plant of miracles, and we have condensed it's pure ingredient to show that it is a wonder of life, to ingest the ingredients of this plant and be filled with a warm inner peace that heals the deep pain within our souls.
I was adopted and messed up all my love life until I grew into an adult. I thought that being like a monk in a cave, and studying the Nazarene scripture (if you become a skeptical scholar and go very in depth you will see that the Christian religion is a lie and they stole it from the Hebrew Nazarene religion). Then I realized that the connection of a human soul is more important than seclusion.
In the last month I was robbed twice, and twice I lost the most in depth love and family I have ever had. When I go into withdrawals I cry hard because I can see that I am the one that made my true love hate me. In the end I was not able to surpass the choice of healing myself for sure over the choice of healing myself with an ultimate human connection (but she is a rebel girl and our relationship would have been rocky for sure if it was taken further). However the second one I lost was still an in depth love full of pure substance, but it was all positive, meaning that it was the true way to nirvana, which is what I need to overcome my past issues and rid myself of the plant ingredients that I use to medicate my soul.
It fell on my lap and I didn't grasp it. My seclusion has turned my friends against me. Being robbed is only karma from my idiot decisions. The last two weeks I was in incredible pain, and that was not even sobriety, of which would cause so much pain, in this lonely place I do not believe I could endure it. Right now is the time to think about the things that I am thankful for, even though things that I want have been opportunities lost. Ultimately in the last couple years in my adult age, I have lost my dream job and lost my dream girl. These are the things people live for and they passes me up like a fool.
