Well ok. Here's the deal. I just got back together with my ex-girlfriend who broke my heart and made me feel like a piece of shit for over a month. She felt like she couldn't trust me because I use drugs & shit (not a lot, just occasional, 1 month use, LSD/ecstasy/ shit like that). But she can't understand the difference between a proper drug use and a junkie. Anyway. All her friends told her that she should dump me and get back with HER ex. She tried to do it, and made my life hell because she kept telling me she's confused and doesn't know what to do etc. etc. I waited for her, I gave her everything and she fucked it. She tried to get back with her ex-boyfriend... but she couldn't... she still felt love for me and none for him.
I could see she loved me but her friends convinced her that I am not the guy for her, she didn't want to get back together with me and we were both miserable. I couldn't take it anymore and I took some MDMA which totally changed me 180 degrees. If before I was depressed as shit, couldn't sleep night. After having a nice introspective lovely trip on MDMA + 2c-b, I realized I'm an idiot because I gave her all my love but she doesn't deserve me, so I accepted the idea that even though I loved her I couldn't be with her and moved on. The next day after taking the MDMA and 2c-b, I went to a party and hooked up with a pretty, sexy girl and we're going to go on a date pretty soon. Me and my ex-girlfriend remained friends. I told her about my new girl, because I thought she was sticking with her decision not to get back together with me. So I totally saw her as JUST a friend.
When I told her about this girl, she freaked out, didn't answer my phone and shit, and sent me lousy messages about love and shit. I thought she was fucking crazy. After a few hours she called me and she was crying and said she felt the worse she has ever felt in her life and that she didn't ever love anyone as much as she loves me and that she only realized this now after checking facebook and seeing the girl I was talking about.
She said fuck her friends and family and what they think, she said she loved me like she never loved anyone else ever before and begged me to get back together with her. After all she did to me... I was pissed as fuck.
Well.... today, after writing this thread. We got back together..... I think I love her too.... but... It's weird... It's not like before I took the MDMA... Anyway.
She unstable, she highly influentiable by friends and family.... I'm afraid she will do the same to me again at a later date. I told her if she pulls that shit one more time, she will never ever see me again.
I'm utterly confused.
So I'm thinking, I want them both! But obviously this would not work.... So maybe I could suggest the blonde girl to be fuck friends?