how should I tell my friends that I love them without seeming weird?

[snowdaytoday]

I tripped with three people last night, two people that I have been friends with for a while now. We will call one of them B. At the peak of the trip last night B and I were walking around and we were talking about a night this past summer when we did shrooms together. He just pretty much told me that he only fucks around with certain people, and he only lets certain people into his home. I feel like he was trying to pretty much tell me like "bro, I only fuck around with a few peo people really and you're one of them." Idk, we may have just been tripping hard and filled with feelings of love and joy, but I'm pretty sure that was his awkward guy way of saying I care about you. And thst really resonated with me, because besides for family I've never had a person or people in my life that kind of accepted me into their pack, if you will, and it makes me want to cry with happiness because that's so nice. I want to tell B and his wife that they mean a lot to me and i care about them, but I don't want to seem weird. Sorry if the question seems silly. What should I do?

 

[StanleyJobson]

You should take ecstasy with your friend and tell him then, because that would be the only scenario where it wouldn't be weird.

 

[GreenSweater]

Swallow your pride and just do it. It's not something to be ashamed of.

 

[coelophysis]

You should take ecstasy with your friend and tell him then, because that would be the only scenario where it wouldn't be weird.

Really?

I don't think you need drugs to tell them how you feel. You're not coming out of the closet to them. I'm sure there will be a point in time during a conversation that is flowing just right that you can bring up and tell them the things that you want to.

 

[pill_billy]

You should take ecstasy with your friend and tell him then, because that would be the only scenario where it wouldn't be weird.

lol yea if you drop an I love you on another guy that shits most likely gona be akward AF... but in my opion you should of just been like yea your my boy watever watever n left it at that... seems like you missed you moment

 

[psy997]

lol yea if you drop an I love you on another guy that shits most likely gona be akward AF... but in my opion you should of just been like yea your my boy watever watever n left it at that... seems like you missed you moment

Are you kidding me? Pretty much all of my friends that I've been even relatively close to in the past five years I've told I love, same them to me.

It's only awkward because of western society's fucked up image of masculinity.

 

[PORB]

tell them first what they did and how you felt from that and then get to the how you feel now, seeing the progression to the feeling should alleviate programmed anxietys with closeness

 

[pill_billy]

Are you kidding me? Pretty much all of my friends that I've been even relatively close to in the past five years I've told I love, same them to me.

It's only awkward because of western society's fucked up image of masculinity.

lol mabe emotions are just bigger in texas

 

[Doldrugs]

You could try growing up and being real with the people you care about.

 

[Cream Gravy?]

lol mabe emotions are just bigger in texas

Maybe people are just kinder in the South? I look my friends in the eyes and tell them I love them when I'm in a moment in which I truly feel that love, and it has never been awkward. What is wrong with expressing genuine emotions for another person you really care about? There's nothing manly about hiding you're emotions forever.

 

[StanleyJobson]

You could try growing up and being real with the people you care about.

I disagree with this. In fact, for me, "growing up" involved getting rid of any emo tendencies I developed in my awkward teen years. The friend of the OP sounds like me, though, where telling another man or being told by another man that they love me would be akin to torture. Everyone's different, though. Have you guys read the book "The 5 Love Languages"? It says everyone has their preferred way of receiving love, with there being 5 main methods. Kind words, acts of service, quality time, and gifts are 4 of them, can't remember the other one.

 

[Tranced]

If it's a big deal to both of you, then I would also recommend doing some MDMA with them. MDMA is a brilliant way to break apart social norms pertaining to human emotion, and can be used in the same way as any other psychedelic to explore this side of our nature.

The experience really loosens friendship up in the long term, and often that's exactly what we need as silly uptight humans.

I wouldn't be anywhere near as close or open to my friends if ecstasy had never happened to us all.

Don't be ashamed - these tools are available for us to use in order to create a more open and happier society. Stigma shouldn't be given a leg to stand on.

You could try growing up and being real with the people you care about.

I'm pretty certain that's what they're attempting to do.

 

[pill_billy]

Maybe people are just kinder in the South? I look my friends in the eyes and tell them I love them when I'm in a moment in which I truly feel that love, and it has never been awkward. What is wrong with expressing genuine emotions for another person you really care about? There's nothing manly about hiding you're emotions forever.

WELL technically WVA is in the south... alothough I understand there is a big difference... But what I was really getting at is the fact that people just throw I love you out there so much it dont mean shit... If you told every person you were barely friends with over the last five years you loved them then you turn around and tell your girl that, its kind of like oo you feel the same way about me as you do him? Ive only told two women outside my family I love them, and I did. I just dont go throwing that shit out there... it really means something to me when I say it and I mean it when I say it... for real it doesnt have anything to do with hiding your emotions it has more to do with not bastardizing the word love

 

[snowdaytoday]

I decided to just tell him.

Me: "i just wanted to let you and J know that y'all have been great friends to me this past year, and I never really say it, but i have a lot of respect for the both of you and I'm just happy that ive had the chance to know you guys and experience things like LSD with yall. I was going to let yall know that last night but i didn't have a chance to, but y'all are my homies and i just wanted to let yall know that i appreciate the both of you being in my life and all the shit yall have done for me."

Him: "Yeah man same to u Ik ur one of J's good friends and ur a good friend to me as well dude its going to sucks when you leave for college."

Without LSD I would have never been able to tell my buddy this, it would have felt awkward and my pesky ego was trying to tell me "No, what if they think it's weird" but i told them, even if it was just through a text. I truly love these people and I'm happy to have known them and I hope they remain parts of my life for years to come

 

[Cream Gravy?]

WELL technically WVA is in the south... alothough I understand there is a big difference... But what I was really getting at is the fact that people just throw I love you out there so much it dont mean shit... If you told every person you were barely friends with over the last five years you loved them then you turn around and tell your girl that, its kind of like oo you feel the same way about me as you do him? Ive only told two women outside my family I love them, and I did. I just dont go throwing that shit out there... it really means something to me when I say it and I mean it when I say it... for real it doesnt have anything to do with hiding your emotions it has more to do with not bastardizing the word love

I also don't just throw around the words "I love you", I truly mean it when I say it. I was just trying to express that it seems like people are more accustomed to being okay with deep friendships where I live.

 

[GreenSweater]

I decided to just tell him.

Me: "i just wanted to let you and J know that y'all have been great friends to me this past year, and I never really say it, but i have a lot of respect for the both of you and I'm just happy that ive had the chance to know you guys and experience things like LSD with yall. I was going to let yall know that last night but i didn't have a chance to, but y'all are my homies and i just wanted to let yall know that i appreciate the both of you being in my life and all the shit yall have done for me."

Him: "Yeah man same to u Ik ur one of J's good friends and ur a good friend to me as well dude its going to sucks when you leave for college."

Without LSD I would have never been able to tell my buddy this, it would have felt awkward and my pesky ego was trying to tell me "No, what if they think it's weird" but i told them, even if it was just through a text. I truly love these people and I'm happy to have known them and I hope they remain parts of my life for years to come

I know what you mean and I know how hard it can be. But it's a good lesson to learn, to let people know. Mostly it means a lot to them as well. Well done man.

 

[Ineffable14]

It's not you,...it's the E talking.

 

[ChemicalSmiles]

Really?

I don't think you need drugs to tell them how you feel. You're not coming out of the closet to them. I'm sure there will be a point in time during a conversation that is flowing just right that you can bring up and tell them the things that you want to.

I don't think its weird either.. I have plenty of friends who I tell I love them.. guys and girls. Some of my friends are so close I tell them I love them everytime I see them.. I dunno.. I keep a close circle. They are like family.

 

[Bagseed]

well the world definately needs some more loving. so go for it in my opinion

 

[swilow]

Are you kidding me? Pretty much all of my friends that I've been even relatively close to in the past five years I've told I love, same them to me.

That makes it sound like you are saying you love people that you really don't, and I can't really see the point in that...

I try and express my feelings for others in actions more then anything. Between close/best friends, its rarely neccesary to articulate your feelings so explicitly; your behaviour generally lets people know But I do like tripping/rolling and being blunt with my emotions. Its amusing and really powerful in effecting group dynamic...

To people who find this weird; that's their problem...