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How open are you about your drug use? Who knows you use drugs?

I've never IV'ed and wouldn't want to, but wouldn't have problem with people that do. It is their business.

As long as you are a nice person to ME. That's all I care about.
 
my parents have caught me smoking the ganja a couple times but they have no idea about the ecstasy, coke, benzo, mephadrone, amphs and many other chemicals i put in my body lol. although my friends and friends of friends know about my drugs use and im not overly botherd that they know about me smoking weed or taking ecstasy but other stuff id rather keep between close friends
 
Pretty open. I feel like I made some mistakes in my youth being way too open about everything, and eventually word kept getting to my parents. I was doing well once I got out of highschool and into college, so they were as OK as they could be with my monthly use of psychedelics.

It is pretty much a known fact by everyone that I used to be into opiates pretty deep, my mom really knows everything and my dad figured it out but doesn't want to know, if you catch my drift. He knows I am off of them now and would rather not talk or think about it. I'm not the first member of my family to go through addiction, in fact I would be the exception if I hadn't.

Still, only my mom and a couple people know that I still "chip" on opiates a few times a year. My dad wouldn't understand the concept of buprenorphine therapy (he would probably think of it like most people think about methadone clinics, preconceptions about both of these things are a bitch) and that I have it under control.

I generally use opiates for family parties (can't stand those motherfuckers), really depressing moments, and very rarely just to get up and go to work in a good mood instead of a bad one.

On an unrelated not, speaking of family reunions, I can't wait til the next time I go up to Philly. I've never tried North East dope, it has always come from either Miami or Houston (which I am beginning to believe carry the same dope) and will be willing to risk a little exploration. I've just got to pick up on my NE slang. I don't think asking for "boy" will fly up there like it does in Miami and the South.
 
The only people I ever kept quiet about it to were my family, but that came out eventually... I think they were/are pretty disappointed...

With regards to other people I've never had it be an issue, but I've never kinda gone round shouting about it, in fact most people who found out about it was when they offered something and I'd be like 'yeah okay, lets do it!'

maybe I've subconsciously surrounded myself with a bunch of druggies...
 
I used to not give a damn who knew. Nowadays I do shit alone. People tell me sometimes that I went "straight" or I have "fell off" I find it comical because if they knew what was in my bag they would know how funny they sound to me. I have found it is easier to live my life when very, very few people know. They can suspect it all day though, I think I act so squarish and obtuse it isn't a huge problem.
 
people are generally pretty liberal about drugs in my city. itd be an odd week if i diddnt smell herb in the air of a public place at least once. ive had taxi drivers try to sell me blow more than once, without me mentioning anything about drugs. i def wouldnt announce it to anyone myself, but i wouldnt have any problem admitting it in a objective and knowledgeable manner to just about anyone in my daily routine. this is the kinda city though, that anything you can think up in your imagination, you can have, its just a phone call away. most ppl seem to have a general sense of anticipation that everything is gonna be legal soon or something.
 
I live in the woods, deep woods. Rednecks and shit. I used to buck conforming in an agro way, but now I kinda blend in and keep to myself. I used to be a wilder creature. I always wanted knowledge, yet I acted pretty foolishly before. I am positive my former life experiences have impacted the way I project myself to people I see everyday. I do not tell many people my exploits, I mean ya'll know. My gal thats about it out here. I get throwed daily. Best part is people think I am Johnny SixPack or something. I love it, anyone that feels restricted by society just close yourself in. You can immerse yourself into a job and than hit the festival or show on the weekend. I don't know... I had to find something that worked for me.
 
3 said:
On an unrelated not, speaking of family reunions, I can't wait til the next time I go up to Philly. I've never tried North East dope, it has always come from either Miami or Houston (which I am beginning to believe carry the same dope) and will be willing to risk a little exploration. I've just got to pick up on my NE slang. I don't think asking for "boy" will fly up there like it does in Miami and the South.
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Smack is what they call dope around here, good luck on your mission =D
 
In previous years I cared so much about who knew what when it came to my drug use. Over time, however, this former custom has been less of an issue. In particular, after my parents found out that I had used and quite possibly still used, most of my foreboding diminished.

Although, I will say that I don't look like the "typical" drug user nor do I try to let people know that I use drugs on what could be considered a "frequent" basis. If I don't give them many prior assumptions to work with then I don't think it matters what they know I do. It shouldn't matter to them.
 
I myself am pretty open about my opiate (heroin) addiction. I mean my girlfriend, who use to be a user herself, however is now on drug court and has such an amazing willpower that she was able to quit the shit cold turkey, and has been living a life of sobriety from every drug for a little over four months now, even when she lives with an addict (myself). Often she has to help me find veins to shoot, hold my arms, make the deals with me, make the deals without me, I know it is a lot of stress put on her and is testing her will every damn day, which is making me sick to my stomach thinking about all the jeopardy I put her through, just because she loves me.

My parents and sisters have known that I was a drug user, and not just marijuana, but ecstasy and cocaine amongst others for many years now, since my 15th birthday (22.5yr now) However, they never in their wildest dreams believed I would use heroin, nor I would use it Intravenous. They thankfully havent washed their hands clean of me yet, with their help, they have actually brought down my use from many bags a day to a couple or just a single bag, and instead of every day use it has been cut down to once every other day and sometimes when lucky just once every third day. Which is really great for me, and gives them hope that there is a chance for me after all.

They have kept it a secret from my extended family (grandparents, aunts and uncles, cousins) for a very long time, although, recently at a family get together they decided to bring it all out on the table. The party was for my older female cousin, a year older than me, who was returning home after doing a 9 month stint in a federal prison (her second stint, in federal prison). So quickly, her and me bonded. Then, it seemed a lot of the other members of the family came out with their own stories. I come from a big family, my father is one of six children, and my mother is one of seven children, so you can only imagine the amount of aunts, uncles, and cousins I have.

An older male cousin of mine, probably ten years my senior, was going through a severe opiate addiction himself, which he had recently completed a program for, and had been clean for two or three months since leaving their clinic, he served as a sort of guide for me.

Another older cousin of mine, in his early 30's, was a very active gang member, in the largest and most powerful Mexican street gang, in our area. He held some status within this gang, however after having his car turn up as the vehicle used in a drive-by shooting, in the hood, as well as being pulled over with an accomplice, fellow gang member, with over a quarter ounce of powder cocaine shoved up his ass, and the same shoved up his friends' ass. He decided enough was enough. He dropped from the gang. Their house had bricks thrown thru their windows. Their garage was graffiti'd with gang insignia. And, there was one or two occasions where bullets were fired at the house, but he got out of it.

His father, my dad's brother, was also a key figure in the early 80's around town, selling crack cocaine to the whites, as he was working for the black drug dealers. After being cut out of the money, him and three of his friends said fuck it, they saved up enough money from working their regular jobs, odd jobs thru roofing and construction, and a bit of peddling dope on the side to all four take a trip from north-western Illinois to Florida. What they brought back with them? The story changes every time I hear it, but I heard it was anywhere between one kilogram to four kilogram of powder cocaine. This was back when the shit was pure as fuck, and cheap as fuck, as well. We are talking 1982-1984, I believe. They brought back the work, and started selling the product themselves, cutting out the black middle-men. One of their biggest downfalls was, all four of the men were the biggest coke heads you could ever imagine, they used cocaine on a daily basis, in vast amounts, they would share with their other friends, their girlfriends, fuck even people they didn't even know. From what my dad said he remembered there being a "white party" in some dilapidated house, in an area of town that was even 'ghetto', back in the early to mid 80's. My dad who is a complete newbie to drugs, estimated that there had to have been a lot of cocaine on a mirror there, and by the end of the night the group at the house had snorted every single bit of it, without getting a nickel for profit. As time went on, and the four of their habits increased dramatically, coupled with police informants ratting them out, one of their closet friends getting busted with many ounces of their product which they couldn't get the money to pay back obviously, they had only one place to turn. Back to those same older black drug dealers that got them involved in the game. However, this time it was different, instead of my uncle, nicknamed "Cowboy", because he stood about 6'3" maybe 6'4" was an all-region baseball, all-region football athlete, who knew how to throw a punch, and always wore a large, white cowboy hat, had to come hat in hand to ask if they were to give up so much money to the dealers, could they get some work and then some more on consignment. What do you know? Not only a few weeks to a month later, my uncle "Cowboy", ended up owing some pretty nasty drug dealers large amounts of well into the thousands. It was so bad that drug dealers would show up at my grandmother's house, in the middle of the night, with their weapons in hand, asking her, "Hey, where has your son ran off to?". Making a long story, a bit more shorter, with the help from my grandparents (his parents), and my father and great uncle (his brother, uncle) ended up paying him in advance, for a job constructing a large barn for the their uncle's farm, and what ya know he dipped out on the work. And, even though he owed his parents money, what he do he ran off with the cash. It was something to the tune of $2,400 to smuggle his ass out of the area, and move to Colorado Springs, Colorado; for three years, until the heat died down, and he returned for my father's wedding.

I tried to poke and prod at my father, and at my uncle, at how much he exactly owed the drug dealers .. never got a straight answer. I knew that it was enough that my grandfather retired as an electrician at John Deere, and my grandmother worked at "Geifmann's", a Jewish-owned grocery store making decent money, because this was way back when grocery workers had a union of their own. No longer were they making simple minimum wage and shit, they were making at least $10/hr with union benefits, and this was back in the early 1980's. Yet, even after numerous times of paying the debts that their youngest son owed to these drug dealers, this last one was way too far beyond their own means, even with the help from my father, and his meager income from farming at the time, to save him from a possible 'death'. Soo.. the next best solution send his ass away. They gave him something like $1,000 to $1,200 in cash, which I think is equivalent to the money of the year 2011 as to being somewhere near $2,500 to $3,000. They bought him a one-way ticket to Colorado Springs, Colorado; where he had a friend with an apartment out there waiting for him, and alongside another one of his friends who also was in desperate needs to leave the area, before he was to be hunted down the two fled. He got himself set up in an apartment, got a good job in the construction field, started making some good money, but bad habits are hard to break, and he got back involved with the dope. Although, this time, he kept it under wraps. Not once did he fall behind in payments to any drug dealers, never asked for any fronts on ANY product no matter the size, and things turned out good for him. Three years later, at my mother and father's wedding, he returned sporting a mustache and a beard and no one knew the difference.

I mean, other than my immediate family and extended family, which I basically have covered. Other kids that I attended school with, or that I worked with at HyVee, which was the epicenter for youth hiring in our area. They built a new superstore, so literally they had hired about one hundred to one hundred forty high school students, recently graduated high school students, or college students, if you were aged 16 to 22 you probably worked at HyVee once in your lifetime from around this area. Lol. I mean anyone who was "in the know", as far as who was smoking pot, and the like, knew that I was a bad kid. I would have the craziest parties at my house at 18 years old, with a double keg, a half jar of ecstasy pills floating around, several pounds of "regular" marijuana and a few ounces of "hydro" marijuana floating around all at the same time, not counting a few eight balls of some fire ass yayo. The parties were off of the hook. Everyone knew what I was about. They knew I partied, they knew I liked to have fun. They knew I did drugs. They knew I sold drugs. Whatever drugs you wanted, I sold, or I could find someone who would give them to me to sell to you. Not a damn problem.

However, those times have been long, long gone now. After the death of my cousin of a cocaine and oxycontin overdose, in an apartment his girlfriend and him, shared with my girlfriend and me. I kind of slowed down my roll, A LOT. I started staying at home on the weekends, not going out to the bars of even house parties. I was perfectly content on popping my hydrocodone 10milligrams, with my girlfriend (between 3 to 5, a day), and throwing back some brews. My girlfriend's younger sister's boyfriend sold marijuana, he had a great settlement for catching hepatitus from a local fastfood place, so he would always be stocked with anywhere from a quarter-pound to a half-pound of 'reggie' marijuana, for sale, as well as wherever he was, in the process of smoking thru, his ounce of some killer dank 'hydro' he'd keep on him for just pure smoking purposes. So I got to smoke a lot of pot for free. And, then out of nowhere alprazolam and clonazepam would magically fall into my lap from a friend of mine, who would jack it from his mother, and sell it to me for ridiculously low prices. The last time we made a deal he gave me 28.5 bars of XANAX for a low price!!!, simply because he needed money as he was the biggest alcoholic and reefer head on the planet, and he knew from the past, I used to "front" him an ecstasy pill every weekend when we went out to a party, since had enough cash to pay for admittance into the club, and his own beer. Plus, all the times I would let him crash at my house, and proceed to get him so geeked out of his mind. He would pay me money for a gram of some killer yayo. Only for me to sit down there and do a "t-shirt" with him free of charge. Lol. What are bro's for!

But, as things have turned to the dark side. And, I have started to use heroin. Especially, now that I use it Intravenous, I try to keep that shit on the down low as much as possible. I know my immediate family knows, and extended family, since my mother is looking for guidance from her sisters, who have sons and daughters older than me who have went thru similar problems, some not as bad, some on the level, and some even worse than my own situation. My dad goes off to tell all of his friends, he works as a farmer, so when he hits the bar around noon and meets up with all of the other old time farmers, my dad is only in this early 50's, but he tends to associate with farmers and tenants who are a good decade or more older than him. They don't look down on me for using heroin, and they are happy that my dad brought it to their attention. As they knew something had been eaten away at him for weeks, since he wouldn't tell them what was going on. They have been very helpful, trying to keep my father upbeat about the situation, giving him words of wisdom and advice; and some of those who have had to go thru similar experiences, are giving him their thoughts, on what to do, and how to handle certain situations, and what to expect from me, so on and so forth.

My friends who I use with, of course, are mostly teenagers who were several years younger than me in high school. These young cats actually were slamming H, before I even was, I was just tooting the damn shit. However, there are a few other guys who are my age who also use, and know that I use. We don't really associate with one another much. We know the code. You don't tell my parents you saw me,and likewise. In fact, my mother's cousin's son, making him my second-cousin (similar to the second-cousin, who OD'ed off of OxyContin/Cocaine about 1.5 years ago) and yet even another second-cousin of mine, thru the same similar set up his mother and my mother being first cousins, A L L actually use heroin, are all going thru the same dealer, too. Lol. The other two second-cousins of mine tend to pair up, and sometimes cop dope together, and go back and shoot up together, since they are more close and kick it with or without dope. However, our second-cousin who died, him and me were close like that too. We would often go and cop together, go back to my house to use, and so on, kick it even without any doubt.

However, all of my old friends, from my old job at the grocery store, or from high school I try to stay away from like the plague. I do not want them to ask me about anything relating to my cousin's death, or the death of yet another real close friend of mine who had OD'ed off of Heroin/XANAX just 3.5 months ago. If I was near, or around, both of those incidents it is highly likely that yes, I do use those drugs that were the cause of those deaths. I just dont feel like having a guilt trip put on me, or anything to that nature. So I just choose to stay clear of them altogether.

With my current job, which is a manufacturing job; where I work in a refridgerated warehouse for the last 9 months, I have finally opened up a little bit to those around me. There are only about four people, that I have even talked to about any sort of drug use. Three of the guys are younger dudes, who are my age early 20's, maybe one is mid 20's, and I know for a fact that two of them use to, and possibly still use cocaine, and smoke marijuna, so its not that big of a deal. And, the fourth guy, is an older gentlemen he has got to be anywhere from early 40s to late 40s, I can't really tell. He told me that he smokes pot, that his brother-in-law normally hooks him up with that. That he used to be a big coke head, but hasn't been able to find any recently. He has picked up on some of my mannerisms, and knows from words amongst the younger guys that I dabble in the shit. I got the dudes number. He says any weekend coming up here, he would like to swoop me up an eight ball, to drop of to him; if the price is right and the quality is there, he is going to be making it an every weekend ordeal, or at least an every other weekend thing. Just not sure I want to get wrapped back up in selling dope again.

I am very sorry to all of you expecting a short post from me. I took some clonazepam, and shot up a bag of dope, thinking that I was going to be nodding out, and it did the reverse effect on me. Wanted to get to the point on so many things but got last on tangents, that got lost on tangents, and had to bring the sucker back to the beginning. I am sorry in advance, for the extra long read, and for anything that might be against the forum's rules and policies, I didn't think I did anything wrong, but I am uncertain,
 
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Myself, my dealer, my girlfriend, friends who have similar interests and possibly my brother and father. My mother knew but she's now dead. People are usually surprised when they find out. I guess I am not a ''stereotypical drug user'' but what is that, anyway? I will bring up drug movies in conversation and see where it goes in order to feel out whether someone is for or against drug use or partakes themselves.
 
All of my friends and most of the family know I smoke weed, as I've been at it for 15 years ever since my high school days. I never hide my usage and will openly toke up at parties, but then again, weed is socially accepted here in Berlin and only the most conservative types would take exception to it.
I've tried introducing some of my friends (who nearly all smoke the ganj) to Kratom, back when I was starting to get into opiates, but it wasn't met with much enthusiasm. Since my circle of friends is quite small and tight-knit, I wisely chose to keep my further experiments a secret from everybody.

These days, I smoke heroin and pop the occasional benzo, and neither friends nor relatives have a clue. I'm gonna be in deep shit if that changes, lol.

Generally, I don't flaunt my being a druggie, i.e. no give-away clothes or accessoires. I look like a square, which has often gotten me out of situations involving the police that could otherwise have gotten ugly.
 
All of my friends know that I smoke pot and use psychedelics - and a certain group of them are the ones that do them with me. But outside three of my closest friends, no one knows that I use harder drugs, and these friends have spent a long time trying to get me off opiates. I'm thankful for those guys, and they've gotten me out of quite a few shitty mental states, but I do feel bad whenever I fall back into opiates and start sneaking around them after all the trouble they've gone through trying to fix me up. It's a testament to how amazing they are that they've stuck through all my bullshit.

But most of my friends don't know, and damn, it can occasionally be exhausting trying to keep that front up. But I've been doing this a long time, and have gotten very good at hiding it. I'm pretty good at pretending to be straight even when I'm totally fucked up, and I guess having a spacy personality helps because if I'm really out of it, my friends just assume that I'm daydreaming a little more than usual.
 
I dont really care who knows, apart from my mum, I'd happily tell everybody how fucked up I was on pills ;)
 
Rabidrabbit said:
Myself, my dealer, my girlfriend, friends who have similar interests and possibly my brother and father. My mother knew but she's now dead. People are usually surprised when they find out. I guess I am not a ''stereotypical drug user'' but what is that, anyway? I will bring up drug movies in conversation and see where it goes in order to feel out whether someone is for or against drug use or partakes themselves.
Click to expand...

Good idea, fishing for a reaction to your "drug movie" reference. I will try that sometime with a cooler cat somewhere to find out where they head is at. I used to look the part of a stereotypical user but over the years I have shed that shit. It is much better for me. I tend to be attracted to people who don't look the part.
 
Mine is incredibly secret; my family knows I have a rx for some painkillers, they don't know the amount I'm taking, or the "extras" I supply them with. I smoke pot with approximately 2 people, everyone else i hide it from. Where I am right now, I just want to feel good and not listen to a lecture. I know it's not a great habit, I don't want to hear it.
 
I'm really quite open about it with my peers and my GF and what not. Some reasons I don't feel the need to hide it are: I want to be honest. I'm confident in my self and my identity. I just love talking about drugs! haha My parents know I smoke pot, drink and are realistic enough to assume there are other drugs I have tried but I do not tell them about that simply because I don't want them to worry. Also when I comes to employers or other authority figures I don't disclose.
 
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