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How High Are You? V. Dude Where's My Bar?

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Smoked a joint after the beers and got anxious again. ugh. a little more high so that ok though i guess. . ?
the last month with police hearings and relived trauma and mdma/benso abuse made me an existecial nihilst and i wanna die
 
Oh. Just remembered I found a small dose of mdma that was left after my drug binge.. trying to resist that now is like the hardest thing i've done in a long time. i can't be fucking rolling when my husband comes home from work. he's fkn clean now. but i would be lying if i said i would not have taken it as soon as i remembered it if i have had some benzos to land on..
 
added:
a tiny bit of mdma, some snorted some sublingual
a tiny bit of dried out speed left since my second to last drug bender
another joint

life is almost bareable again
 
Damn, it seems like everybody's taking LSD, gonna have to see if I still have that last 1/2 tab I've been saving... I know it's somewhere, just have to find it but I don't know if the universe wants me to. If I manage to find it within 5min I will consider tripping today.

I've been reading about rapé (Indian tobacco) and really want to try some. I wonder if anyone has tried it?
I wanted to order some but there are so many different blends with a bunch of weird names, it's hard to choose... I just want to know what's inside and how much (they're made with different kinds of plants and ashes), I don't care for their "cleansing" power or any of that woke pseudoscience stuff mixed with some cultural appropriation.

OT:
Kratom and caffeine
 
I took 300mg of "MDMA" last night and was VERY disappointed....... one of the most reputable vendors and LOOKED like crystal molly.....

Just got a mild stimulant type buzz and some very light MDMA effects.... -_- idk why... maybe because I took 500ug of LSD the other day?

I've used this vendor before and his stuff is always legit? sigh
 
4meSM said:
I've been reading about rapé (Indian tobacco) and really want to try some. I wonder if anyone has tried it?
I wanted to order some but there are so many different blends with a bunch of weird names, it's hard to choose... I just want to know what's inside and how much (they're made with different kinds of plants and ashes), I don't care for their "cleansing" power or any of that woke pseudoscience stuff mixed with some cultural appropriation.
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Just get some beedi's (bidi's).... they're basically just really strong hand rolled cigarettes with a shit load of nicotine in them. They were legendary when I was younger everyone wanted one.
 
SnafuInTheVoid said:
Just get some beedi's (bidi's).... they're basically just really strong hand rolled cigarettes with a shit load of nicotine in them. They were legendary when I was younger everyone wanted one.
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Never seen those but I'm gonna look into it!

Rapé is a different thing because it's taken intranasally, it's a pretty good way to absorb a significant amount of nicotine without having to smoke it. The traditional rapé is mixed with ashes which increases the pH, thus making nicotine much more bioavailable. I just want to try that ROA, apparently it's pretty good for lucid dreaming as well.
 
4meSM said:
Never seen those but I'm gonna look into it!

Rapé is a different thing because it's taken intranasally, it's a pretty good way to absorb a significant amount of nicotine without having to smoke it. The traditional rapé is mixed with ashes which increases the pH, thus making nicotine much more bioavailable. I just want to try that ROA, apparently it's pretty good for lucid dreaming as well.
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oh.... yeah that stuff is cool, too.... but you'll be blowing black shit out of your nose and you'll sound like a coke head from constantly sniffling...just FYI lol

you don't need to go to India to get that stuff.
 
PtahTek said:
some trip
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Acid?
4meSM said:
I've been reading about rapé (Indian tobacco) and really want to try some. I wonder if anyone has tried it?
Click to expand...
I see mapacho being sold by the same vendor where I get my 'inca tea' (coca tea bags and 'flour' which is powdered coca leaves). He sells all kinds of Amazonian oddities, sometimes even has sticks with a frog venom smeared on which apparently has psychedelic opioid effects. You're supposed to burn your arm and rub the frog venom into the burn. I did consider trying it.. but no, I'll pass.

I think the tobacco you're talking about is the same as mapacho (nicotiana rustica) but powdered and mixed with a weak base (the same way that coca is used for chewing). I use baking soda rather than lime for chewing coca (have a mouth full at the moment), I'm sure you could make your own sniffing tobacco with mapacho and a little baking soda.

I've wanted to try snus but only smokable tobacco is legal here.. don't know who made that decision but whatever.
 
Kaden_Nite said:
I think the tobacco you're talking about is the same as mapacho (nicotiana rustica) but powdered and mixed with a weak base (the same way that coca is used for chewing).

I've wanted to try snus but only smokable tobacco is legal here.. don't know who made that decision but whatever.
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Yes that's what I'm talking about. The ashes contain sodium carbonate so that's why they use them in the traditional preparation, but you're right I could make my own blend (if I had the right kind of tobacco...).
I'm not too sure about its legality here either, I don't think they sell it locally and all the vendors are based in the Netherlands (doesn't seem illegal to import though).

And yeah stay away from that frog stuff (aka Kambo), it's a poison. It may be safe to take in low doses and it could even have some interesting properties, but I wouldn't treat it lightly.
 
Yeah, tales of the giant monkey frog sounded fun when I read about it in Vice as a teenager (back when it was a magazine), knowing more about it now, it sounds pretty unpleasant.

There is also a psychoactive honey that people in Nepal climb cliffs for. It too is considered a toxin, but a flavoursome one 🐝
 
Kaden_Nite said:
Yeah, tales of the giant monkey frog sounded fun when I read about it in Vice as a teenager (back when it was a magazine), knowing more about it now, it sounds pretty unpleasant.

There is also a psychoactive honey that people in Nepal climb cliffs for. It too is considered a toxin, but a flavoursome one 🐝
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"The dose makes the poison"
But some substances are way more dangerous than others and have to be handled with extreme care.

Interesting fact: some substances, such as endocrine disruptors, seem to behave as poisons even at extremely low doses. Some of them are in fact more dangerous at low doses than at medium doses.

OT:
Gonna take some more kratom. Thinking about buying some CBD weed, there's a store nearby that sells hemp flower and all that kind of stuff.
 
ok that last dosing just made life bearable for like half an hour it was fkn tiny doses now i wanna die again

added: some 50x kanna extract bc why the fuck not
 
Kaden_Nite said:
Acid?
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By the strictest defs: No... but close enough and enjoyable. :)
Not sure what I am even do up still but it is what it is, no?

OT:
2g chocolate bent kratom
.5mg alpraz
last vestiges of weed... god forbid... bout to go knockin on mfs doors right now... yo where da wood at? haha
Nah, imma wait til it come to me... tired and done for the day already. Just gonna enjoy whats left of a cool morning before it gets to be 9B degrees. :)
Scare up a little vittlins for brffass and count my blessings.
One love all
 
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4 mg Flunitrazepam hours ago
500 mg Oxazepam
about 3 mg Diclazepam (have to fill up because I use small bottles - the real stash are 10 1l-bottles :D)

Ah yes, the only one i did never touch is the Pagoclone because it doesn't really solve completely, there is a swirl of fog in it when i shake it, but without greater pieces - so it is more or less homogenous and have to look like that - I took PG as a solubent - if everybody wants to have it, ok. otherwise i'll flush it as well as the SL-164 (a methaqualone-analog). I always read a lot about a new substance before i really try it. SL-164 is said do cause (depends on how much you take) convulsions and tics... I took 1 mg just for the poison-test and there was nothing. The normal intake is higher, that's why i just took one mg. )

Oh and I'm so stupid, I took two 1g-baggies of it. Now I know why they were so cheap.... meh. It's in the frigde next to 1g Clona ( i'm not sure if i will reallly make a solution because it is sooooooo strong and also the next day I'm stumbing around like I was drunk.... 1 g Eti and 1g Dicla to taper if necessary. If I'm very lucky I get as much as Xanax as i want for a longer time... I have a serbian friend who is coming to Vienna every 2 weeks ;)

I hope it was not just Blabla..... Does anybody know whether the KSALOL or Kern Alpra are free over the counter meds or do you need a prescription?

JJ
 
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Man modafinil is so much nicer, I don't even know what that shit was that I insisted on snorting for days. On 600mg modafinil over the day, obviously quite a high dose, and 600mg pregabalin in 2 doses... actually just fell asleep for 5 hours or so in the middle of the day having been up over 24 hours.

Gonna try to stay off the benzos and use the pregab to coast back to a better baseline... spending the evening with a 96 year old elderly relative with some obvious brain deterioration which makes almost any coherent conversation impossible - but I must say, I feel a lot less frustrated than when I was taking kratom...

That pseudo speed probably did fuck up my brain a bit regardless... back to positive habits and healthy living now... Really really want to get to a place I can take a god damn real psychedelic but just haven't felt mentally stable enough to do so for a long time...

Also wondering about how I'll feel if I shorten my disso abstinence target a bit... Christ, 6 months seemed like a shorter time when I said it... ah well. Peace.
 
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