how drugs is nothing to addicts like ourselves..

i feel u OP.

im on codeine, Xanax, alcohol, weed, and steroids as i type this. could give a fuck less.

fuck sobriety. the drugs feel too good.
 
I need to get my own lawyer due to my earnings; yes, I make good money but I dont have a fucking dollar due to my drug problems. we'll see once I see a lawyer. I actually wanted to be put away and even asked but they refused.. imagine? I wanted to be put away to sober me up and smarten me up but they didnt want to. what do I have to do to be put away? ha. most people think I am nuts for that but I am losing it, man! I am broke, sick, miserable and just dont have the drive to "work" right now.

I just beat a DUI in the MA/Boston area. I was 100% guilty. It took me $5000 for a good lawyer and it was continued without a finding although I am now on probation for a year - no drug testing involved. It's all about the $$ you throw down for a lawyer.

Also, it was my second offense (first DUI was in 2007).
 
@BBT, PO's in Mass completely respect Subs or 'Done. That is between you and a doctor and the law cannot interfere with that (I had community corrections and the color "Red" for a year suspended)... They had no issue with my subs, and someone in the program was on the clinic which they are fine with (as long as you'll sign a release for them to get your UA's/Swabs from said clinic or doctor if they want).

regarding the CO weed thing...they made 400 MILLION dollars in tax money from this (in a year). The taxes for recreational use are 20% for CO residents and 35% for out-of staters. Getting your med card makes green literally 1/3 of the price in denver.
 
let's see what happens, man! I know Boston/MA is pretty bad when it comes to the dope scene, so they always respect those looking to "get better". I will def. be going to the clinic tomorrow and starting my done; by the time I get on probation I will hopefully be on a high dosage of done; if not, ill still be shooting dope. we'll see.

pinpoint - I will need to pay 5k for a lawyer myself; you got a continue w/o a finding? I got that for my first DUI but we'll see how this plays out. I hope I dont get smoked!
 
True, I'm just a little confused you did read the whole "daily shooting dope for 1.5 years" right? Just wondering because I was fully addicted and went on subs for 8 months to straighten my life. Just confused as to how that phrase applied to me lol. Addiction can happen to anyone and I don't know how I feel about a genetic predisposition, it almost seeks to remove personal responsibility. I believe we all choose or choose not to use, be it some disease or gene related thing we all choose to do it. Personal choices define how you use not your family history or past, sure they effect it but they don't cause it.



Yes but you stopped just like that first try while you still could many are not that lucky.
Haha I see your one of those people who did dope for a year than quit no problem therefore us users who have done it for decades since our childhood should be able to quit too I see.
I have used opiates since 15 or so and its all I really know and many people on here are the same way. Its a choice i know but then again itS not once an addict is hooked they are usually powerless. I mean many people want out of addiction so bad but cannot get out. I take responsibility for my actions I know I'm the one who chose this life now i got to play these card but life can be a bitch I've been homeless with my family I've had lots lot sof fucked up shit happen to me I'm not comfortable talking about on a message board on top of my chronic pain i developed at a young age so when I got introduced to painkillers it made me feel confident and pain free and I didn't feel so bad about myself I never wanted that feeling to go away.

1 year is nothing I mean would you be clean if you were homeless or had all these mental issues that prevent you from having that good job and wife and kids? You got mixed up with bad things for a while here and there but was able to get out each time before it was too late. I understand many people have horrible lives and don't use but that doesn't discredit the fact addicts are usually in dire situations with no help and face huge obstacles which they need to overcome when it seems they have no help at all with a sick mindset. Many don't have a girlfriend to tell them to quit and support then many have lost everything but can't see anything but dope as in their sick mind state dope is the only thing that will make things better thus putting the addict in a vicious cycle that's extremely hard to break. It's also hard when you got chronic pain to live with on top of that, with chronic pain some days you feel you can handle it and others you feel like giving up this can be very hard for someone to stay sober cause they know their pills/heroin or whatever their DOC is will bring them out of the pain they have to live with 24/7.
Mental pain can be the same way too.

Saying that some people have a genetic predisposition to addiction doesn't take away addicts personal responsibility for becoming an addict.
Just my 2 cents we are all entitled to our opinion and that's mine. I agree with you but Also disagree if that makes sense I always say that its my fault I'm an addict not because of what I've been through or because I had a doctor prescribe me strong drugs its because of me I'm the reason I use I chose this life now I got to play these cards. Its only when an addict recognises this that real change can begin because they no longer have an excuse to use they see they are letting themselves down and killing themselves by continuing to use.
 
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ill tell you now, so many times people who are kicking opiates have the withdrawals in their head! if an addict has no idea withdrawals are coming, then they are THAT MUCH BETTER OFF! its those who read/hear/know about it go through the worst, because they are expecting and already feeling before it happens.

there are times I went through withdrawals while locked up and knew I had no other options, and felt somewhat OK but still not great. then there are times where I knew I could get out, get my fix, etc, and my withdrawals were that much WORSE because of what I would tell myself.

w/o a doubt withdrawals are not fun but its a mind game as well.
 
ill tell you now, so many times people who are kicking opiates have the withdrawals in their head! if an addict has no idea withdrawals are coming, then they are THAT MUCH BETTER OFF! its those who read/hear/know about it go through the worst, because they are expecting and already feeling before it happens.

there are times I went through withdrawals while locked up and knew I had no other options, and felt somewhat OK but still not great. then there are times where I knew I could get out, get my fix, etc, and my withdrawals were that much WORSE because of what I would tell myself.

w/o a doubt withdrawals are not fun but its a mind game as well.

Haha tell that to the guy puking his bag off laying on the ground shitting himself. I never knew much about withdrawals I stayed off the internet till a year or 2 ago but the first time it happened when i went without for a day or something I was like WTF is this? Why do I weigh a thousand pounds and why can't I eat or sleep and why am I sweating my bag off.

I get what you mean you need to be in a good mind state or a strong one if you will to overcome it but its still very physical the sweating, puking ,pains and insomnia is a very real thing despite what a person had read on the internet.

I'll remind you of this when your sick looking for your fix or going to jail to detox.
Haha I kid I kid I see what you mean but it sounds like you are making it seem pretty easy to go through the physical withdrawals when you yourself struggle daily to have enough money to keep well.
 
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well ill be going to jail/detox soon, so remind me in a few months.

just saying, I've been down this road multiple times before. and anytime I knew I could GET A FIX it seemed much worse than the times I knew I had no other option. w/o a doubt the puking and shitting occurs, but until youre made fully aware of what is GOING TO HAPPEN you seem to think nothing of it and just think youre not feeling so hot! peeps will get "dope sick" before it even occurs and thats just based on what they hear/know.
 
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