GodSpeedK
Bluelighter
Man, you're 6ftfucking2! Girls love tall guys.
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SLR Moderators: Senior Staff
How do You Guys Get Sex?
- Thread starter Michael_25
- Start date
Captain.Heroin
Bluelight Crew
^ this
It's incredibly easy to have sex. I would post about my shenanigans on BL but I'm choosing not to.
Cornishman
Bluelighter
Just get out and meet some chicks.
It's that easy.
It's that easy.
Cohesion
Bluelighter
Sign up for a dating site and go on some dates.
You will probably have some nice company and conversation and never see most of them again, but it is good practice. In a lot of ways.
-Getting cleaned up
-Thinking dating brings dating
-Mannerisms
-Appropriate/compelling conversation practice
I did it, it was fun. Nothing long term came from that, but it was valuable experience. And yeah I got laid.
You will probably have some nice company and conversation and never see most of them again, but it is good practice. In a lot of ways.
-Getting cleaned up
-Thinking dating brings dating
-Mannerisms
-Appropriate/compelling conversation practice
I did it, it was fun. Nothing long term came from that, but it was valuable experience. And yeah I got laid.
Lazaraus45
Bluelighter
- Joined
- Sep 10, 2011
- Messages
- 131
the more you make a big deal out of it the harder it will be, go to festivals and be an absolute man whore, once you realise how easy it is you'll have no problem
34-dihydroxyphen
Bluelighter
- Joined
- Feb 14, 2007
- Messages
- 2,362
5 years ago, this would have been great advice.
But nobody really smokes anymore. When I was previously in college, 90% of the friendships I made were initiated by having them ask me for a cigarette.
In my current run at college, I rarely even get asked for a cigarette period because nobody is smoking.
It sucks. More young people should take up the habit. You only live once. Quit when you turn 25. Or 30. Depending on what you want to do. But if you are "college age," you should be smoking, doing drugs, and having promiscuous, risky sex. Or else you're just going to get slammed by a midlife crisis when you get in your 40's and do all that shit then, when your body can't recover from bronchitis and gonorrhea.
weekend addiction
Bluelighter
I'm not offering any original advice here but don't stress about it too much. My guess is your confidence is low and that makes it hard to have a conversation. You may also need to work on conversation skills such as recognizing social cues etc. Get out more. I have heard of great results by getting a dog and going to the dog park. But going to the gym or anything will work. Don't focus on getting a girl. Focus on improving your chances of getting a girl for the moment. Gym is your best bet. Improved energy, self-esteem, and you can meet some good looking women there. As long as your surrounding yourself with people you've got decent chances. It just takes time and patience.
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quimquimmery
Greenlighter
- Joined
- May 19, 2013
- Messages
- 5
I call an escort. And buy some coke from here and then fuck her. Not complicated
Michael_25
Bluelighter
Thanks for all the replies, guys. For one thing, I don't want to have sex with an escort; I want to have sex with someone who ACTUALLY wants to have sex with me. Also, as for smoking: I am smoker. And I do smoke on campus. However, there are very few smokers at my school, and I've never been approached for a cigarette or a light. I don't know what it is about me, but I just can't connect with a girl. And to add to the burden I don't really have any friends, but rather acquaintances. I live a pretty secluded life and don't do anything on the weekends since I have no one to hang out with. As a poster on here wrote earlier, at my age people already have an estabished social circle that's hard to penetrate; and girls around my age are getting engaged or are newly wed. This loneliness is a large part of why I use drugs. It helps me escape from my miserable existence.
34-dihydroxyphen
Bluelighter
- Joined
- Feb 14, 2007
- Messages
- 2,362
I know exactly how you feel.
It's why I've recently opened up to the idea of online dating, reluctantly. It takes the most frustrating and confusing aspect out of the equation: Figuring out if this person doesn't like you, or simply doesn't have time for you (or any new people).
I think people stay more secluded, and are more guarded, and are less likely to take risks today as well. It used to be easy as fuck for me to make new friends/meet girls, but this time around, something is different, either with me, with them, or a little bit of both. It's a bitch, but there are ways around the system. Try online dating, and you don't have to be concerned with proper context/location and all that other shit. If somebody goes out with you, you know they are at least mildly intrigued, and you are in a genuine dating context, so you will have a better idea of what to do when.
i'm not complaining though
endlessnameless
Bluelighter
No offense to you Mr.Scagnattie, but that whole 'in your league/out of your league' mentality is exactly what subconciously sets you up for failure. Judging a woman as 'out of your league' and not approaching her based on this is going to be the cause of so many missed oppertunities with beautiful females. Also, approaching a woman with this same mentality is only setting yourself up for failure and you're much more likely to fuck up.
As someone mentioned earlier Micheal, the key is often as simple as not over thinking the approach. Timing can often be key also and I think one of the problems here is that you're approaching women in a place of education...I mean, its not a nightclub or a bar. Having said that, if your college has a cafe or indeed a bar on campus I guarantee your chances will be much higher in such venues as opposed to random spots around campus where women are either busy, or if they're alone then they probably want to be left alone.
Mr.Scagnattie
Bluelighter
I have a lot of friends that have had a lot of success from online dating. I've never personally tried it but I've been hearing a lot better things about it for young people than years ago. Worth a shot for sure.
I agree to a point, but you still have be to realistc eventually (not talking about the OP here just in general). If you're a 4 and you're looking to bang a 10, that's setting yourself up for failure haha. You're right, you shouldn't not go up to a girl because she's hotter than you are, but you still need to not be delusional. Hah. Just my opinion. I know a lot of less attractive guys with girls better looking but when the disparity is too great, the chances of her being interested, for just sex, are slim..
Do the online dating thing. Right now you are exuding desperation, and maybe awkwardness, which is why you're having no success. Meeting someone online will let you send a few messages back and forth so you can get to know each other a bit before you meet, and if the girl likes you she will forgive some awkwardness.
Like everybody says, try to be relaxed and forget about the dry spell. Pretend to yourself that you're already having sex with one or more other girls and that you're only meeting this new one to see if you like her better than the ones you already are seeing. Don't say this in words or be arrogant or an asshole about it, but pretending this can give you the appearance of confidence.
To those who suggest escorts: it would just make him feel worse. As he said, he wants mutual interest.
Like everybody says, try to be relaxed and forget about the dry spell. Pretend to yourself that you're already having sex with one or more other girls and that you're only meeting this new one to see if you like her better than the ones you already are seeing. Don't say this in words or be arrogant or an asshole about it, but pretending this can give you the appearance of confidence.
To those who suggest escorts: it would just make him feel worse. As he said, he wants mutual interest.
dopemaster
Bluelight Crew
Ima copy and paste some advice I posted on a similar topic. If you are in college its just as simple as introducing yourself. Hi or Hello will suffice. Study buddies. I always type my notes and alot of other people do to. So I usually make 3 female study buddies per class. We end up emailing each other notes and calling if we miss classes and shit like that. Anyways if you know woman its kinda a snowball effect in terms of meeting more. Well here is some shit I wrote for this dude about confidence and college chicks, so just read that. Its all about looking and feeling good or at least pretending to till you do. Honestly once you are comfortable with yourself shit gets easier.
Are you confident with your appearance? Its important to look presentable if you want to get girls. Id recomend getting some nice denim like levis, calvin klein, lucky, etc. in a size that actually fits you. Avoid uncomfortable shit like khakis like the fucking plague. If you have to cuz of work the only acceptable type is flat front chinos. I find having nice shoes also impresses women. If you have no sense of style just buy some nike air force ones in black or white or nike dunks or old skool jordans. Get yourself some long sleeve button down shirts and regular t shirts. Get one pair of nice sunglasses that go with everything obviously in black. You can never go wrong with t shirts and hats that have sports teams on them. Hell buy the comfy socks and underwear while you are at it. Women tend to like short hair and a bit of scruff or a short beard. Get a simple style that fucking matches and fits comfortably. That will go a long way. If you look a feel good you will feel a hell of a lot more confident.
Next learn how to carry on a conversation. Its easy enough as saying hi or hello or introducing yourself. Comment about the weather. Women love to talk about themselves so ask them questions. If you are on a date and you are doing all the talking chances are its not going well. Just say anything to start conversations and learn the names of women you will be around. Have no opinion on controverisial issues. With school study buddies are excellent ways to meet women plus trading notes helps you out in school and the girls appreciate help and also it makes you look smart and succesful if you take the initiative to make a few study buddies. Of course pick the hottest girls you can get to converse with you, but not one thats functionally retarded. This gets you her digits. If you talk to women you can always say hey you wanna get some coffee or a drink or grab lunch. You get the idea.
Also if women see other women speaking to you that makes you look more valuable in their eyes. So its important to meet all the woman around and have them know your name. I have at least 2 female study buddies by the end of the first class I take each semester. Be nice to ugly and fat chicks. They have friends. If you do land a hot date take her to a movie or to get fast food. Dont break the bank but show her a good time. A walk in the park is free but its still nice you know. So you dont have to blow a shit load of money to impress women, but be willing to if you have to.
When things get sexual dont be a pansy. So if a woman is giving you the greenlight go for it. If you get some "I just want to be friends" bullshit say ok and just be friends. There are more women. Besides she might introduce you to someone later on.
Be a fucking gentleman. Open doors for women. If you are at a bar talk to a girl for a minute to see if shes receptive and then ask her if she would like a drink. If you go to a bar with a friend dont bring a total loser. Bring a wingman close to your level and if there are women there dont be afraid to say hi and introduce your friend. The biggest problem is not trying. The one thing to avoid at all cost is buying women drugs as that is a black hole. If you stutter or slip up your words its ok to say sorry Im a bit nervous. Its not the end of the world to be a bit nervous. You just dont let it consume you.
Its also good to pay a woman a compliment if you are on a date. Hot chicks know they are hot. Insecure women are dying to hear that they are attractive. Dont go for the ugly chick thinking it will be easier in the end. Chances are you are dead wrong as she might have hang ups about her looks. I find attractive women are more likely to put out. Also if a woman comes up and talks to you chances are shes a bit interested. So get comfy with yourself and feel confident in your appearance and get comfortable talking to women. Its all about feeling comfortable with everything and faking it until you do.
Hope this stuff helps.
Are you confident with your appearance? Its important to look presentable if you want to get girls. Id recomend getting some nice denim like levis, calvin klein, lucky, etc. in a size that actually fits you. Avoid uncomfortable shit like khakis like the fucking plague. If you have to cuz of work the only acceptable type is flat front chinos. I find having nice shoes also impresses women. If you have no sense of style just buy some nike air force ones in black or white or nike dunks or old skool jordans. Get yourself some long sleeve button down shirts and regular t shirts. Get one pair of nice sunglasses that go with everything obviously in black. You can never go wrong with t shirts and hats that have sports teams on them. Hell buy the comfy socks and underwear while you are at it. Women tend to like short hair and a bit of scruff or a short beard. Get a simple style that fucking matches and fits comfortably. That will go a long way. If you look a feel good you will feel a hell of a lot more confident.
Next learn how to carry on a conversation. Its easy enough as saying hi or hello or introducing yourself. Comment about the weather. Women love to talk about themselves so ask them questions. If you are on a date and you are doing all the talking chances are its not going well. Just say anything to start conversations and learn the names of women you will be around. Have no opinion on controverisial issues. With school study buddies are excellent ways to meet women plus trading notes helps you out in school and the girls appreciate help and also it makes you look smart and succesful if you take the initiative to make a few study buddies. Of course pick the hottest girls you can get to converse with you, but not one thats functionally retarded. This gets you her digits. If you talk to women you can always say hey you wanna get some coffee or a drink or grab lunch. You get the idea.
Also if women see other women speaking to you that makes you look more valuable in their eyes. So its important to meet all the woman around and have them know your name. I have at least 2 female study buddies by the end of the first class I take each semester. Be nice to ugly and fat chicks. They have friends. If you do land a hot date take her to a movie or to get fast food. Dont break the bank but show her a good time. A walk in the park is free but its still nice you know. So you dont have to blow a shit load of money to impress women, but be willing to if you have to.
When things get sexual dont be a pansy. So if a woman is giving you the greenlight go for it. If you get some "I just want to be friends" bullshit say ok and just be friends. There are more women. Besides she might introduce you to someone later on.
Be a fucking gentleman. Open doors for women. If you are at a bar talk to a girl for a minute to see if shes receptive and then ask her if she would like a drink. If you go to a bar with a friend dont bring a total loser. Bring a wingman close to your level and if there are women there dont be afraid to say hi and introduce your friend. The biggest problem is not trying. The one thing to avoid at all cost is buying women drugs as that is a black hole. If you stutter or slip up your words its ok to say sorry Im a bit nervous. Its not the end of the world to be a bit nervous. You just dont let it consume you.
Its also good to pay a woman a compliment if you are on a date. Hot chicks know they are hot. Insecure women are dying to hear that they are attractive. Dont go for the ugly chick thinking it will be easier in the end. Chances are you are dead wrong as she might have hang ups about her looks. I find attractive women are more likely to put out. Also if a woman comes up and talks to you chances are shes a bit interested. So get comfy with yourself and feel confident in your appearance and get comfortable talking to women. Its all about feeling comfortable with everything and faking it until you do.
Hope this stuff helps.
Women under 30 want to be ignored.
Women over 30 want to be adored.
The person with the least interest has the power in the relationship.
But be careful: tread lightly if you meet someone who you have a major connection with. Playing games can give you security because they work most of the time, but play games with someone that could be truly special to you and you could ruin it, because games keep you at a distance. If the other person is opening up and senses you aren't, they can shut down and you may not be able to get them to be vulnerable with you again.
A little bit of game is usually necessary at the very beginning, though, regardless. It's a kind of dance, and certain moves are expected.
Women over 30 want to be adored.
The person with the least interest has the power in the relationship.
But be careful: tread lightly if you meet someone who you have a major connection with. Playing games can give you security because they work most of the time, but play games with someone that could be truly special to you and you could ruin it, because games keep you at a distance. If the other person is opening up and senses you aren't, they can shut down and you may not be able to get them to be vulnerable with you again.
A little bit of game is usually necessary at the very beginning, though, regardless. It's a kind of dance, and certain moves are expected.
dopemaster
Bluelight Crew
^^^^^
Thats some good stuff. If your to eager it turns women off. Ive never heard that saying. I dont usually mess with women over 30 mainly cuz im still in my late 20s. There is definetly games and even flirting is a bit of a game. For me its just something that gets easier over time. Its good to put yourself out there where women know you, but you certainly dont want to be at anyones beck and call.
Some thing else to add. I dated a very attractive girl for a while. Girls that were not interested in me before, started to persue me and I noticed this. I had chased one girl for a long time and she rarely gave me the pussy and we were just friends. Ever since I dated this other girl shes been on my nuts and I dont even really like her these days. Its like the more I ignore her the more she comes after me. This happened with other women too. After dating one very attractive woman I was able to move on to other beautiful women and it kinda perpetuated itself and now Im pretty content casually dating and playing the field. So I think once you get a rep among women for dating attractive ones they think your a catch. They think to themselves "she most she something in him" I used to just want serious relationships as that was a guaranteed steady source of sex but now Im not really afraid to be single as I will just start to carry on with another woman.
I dont know if its confidence or what but I really think that one girl set it off and made my life alot better just by dating me for 6 months. To be honest my mother had said to me that dating this woman seemed to really up my stats with the local women I knew. Parents can actually have good dating advice sometime. My mom at least. My father gives me awful advice.
So its good to be seen as desirable. Having alot of female aquaintances is a great way to do that. So if one woman finds you attractive another will pick up on that and instinctually think you are desirable.
Thats some good stuff. If your to eager it turns women off. Ive never heard that saying. I dont usually mess with women over 30 mainly cuz im still in my late 20s. There is definetly games and even flirting is a bit of a game. For me its just something that gets easier over time. Its good to put yourself out there where women know you, but you certainly dont want to be at anyones beck and call.
Some thing else to add. I dated a very attractive girl for a while. Girls that were not interested in me before, started to persue me and I noticed this. I had chased one girl for a long time and she rarely gave me the pussy and we were just friends. Ever since I dated this other girl shes been on my nuts and I dont even really like her these days. Its like the more I ignore her the more she comes after me. This happened with other women too. After dating one very attractive woman I was able to move on to other beautiful women and it kinda perpetuated itself and now Im pretty content casually dating and playing the field. So I think once you get a rep among women for dating attractive ones they think your a catch. They think to themselves "she most she something in him" I used to just want serious relationships as that was a guaranteed steady source of sex but now Im not really afraid to be single as I will just start to carry on with another woman.
I dont know if its confidence or what but I really think that one girl set it off and made my life alot better just by dating me for 6 months. To be honest my mother had said to me that dating this woman seemed to really up my stats with the local women I knew. Parents can actually have good dating advice sometime. My mom at least. My father gives me awful advice.
So its good to be seen as desirable. Having alot of female aquaintances is a great way to do that. So if one woman finds you attractive another will pick up on that and instinctually think you are desirable.
Michael_25
Bluelighter
Impossible to Find a Girlfriend
I just don't get it. I've been single for five years now and it's itching at me. I don't understand the fundamentals. I don't understand the underlyings of how to form relationships. I'm a post-grad student and see a lot of other students mingling with the opposite sex. However, every time I try to I get shut down. I don't think I'm coming off as "desperate", as I only talk about "safe" topics. It's just that it's good to feel wanted. And when you haven't felt wanted in over five years, it erodes your self-esteem and confidence. I have tried online dating but to no avail.
I just don't get it. I've been single for five years now and it's itching at me. I don't understand the fundamentals. I don't understand the underlyings of how to form relationships. I'm a post-grad student and see a lot of other students mingling with the opposite sex. However, every time I try to I get shut down. I don't think I'm coming off as "desperate", as I only talk about "safe" topics. It's just that it's good to feel wanted. And when you haven't felt wanted in over five years, it erodes your self-esteem and confidence. I have tried online dating but to no avail.