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How do you fight hopelessness?

Ixchellian said:
"He who has a why to live can bear almost any how."
- Nietzsche
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I love this quote (and Nietzsche in general). For myself, losing the "why" has been the biggest source of pain in my life. The only reason I'm still kickin' is because I'm fortunate enough to have a family who give's a fuck. I really am hopeless, and I desperately want to check out of this life. But I would rather endure this pain a thousand times over than to subject others (my family) to the loss of their "why".

So how do I fight hopelessness? By constantly reminding myself of the fact that hope is undeniably present in the live's of many others, and that I cannot possibly know what struggle's life has placed upon them.
 
Thanks for all the wonderful responses. I truly love this community, it is miles beyond all the other "drug messageboards" I've encountered on the net. I am doing my best to build my ego back up, but even with sobriety (although I will still drink occasionally, in social situations), I am still making the same mistakes: Staying up late and sleeping late, missing class, fucking around when I should be doing work...etc...etc. But it's nice to know there are people out there for whom my experiences are not entirely alien.
 
Right now I feel so alone. My best friend/love of my life just passed away and all I want to do is crawl into a ball and die. I try so hard to get my mind of it but I can't. The best thing I've done so far is talk to him. Whenever I go into bed I just lay there and rant to him...hoping he hears me. Maybe you could do the same. Just talk out loud and hope someone hears you. I mean it doesn't have to be to a loved one it just can be to anyone.... Someone must be listening to you. Also you could maybe write it out and get things off your chest. Listen to music or rage. Do something that makes you want to live another day. Don't bottle up your emotions though. Let it all out.
 
alwaysblazed said:
Right now I feel so alone. My best friend/love of my life just passed away and all I want to do is crawl into a ball and die. I try so hard to get my mind of it but I can't. The best thing I've done so far is talk to him. Whenever I go into bed I just lay there and rant to him...hoping he hears me. Maybe you could do the same. Just talk out loud and hope someone hears you. I mean it doesn't have to be to a loved one it just can be to anyone.... Someone must be listening to you. Also you could maybe write it out and get things off your chest. Listen to music or rage. Do something that makes you want to live another day. Don't bottle up your emotions though. Let it all out.
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Your not alone on here <3 These are wise words, have so much respect for your strength!

cire113 said:
fuck man i just get through the day.....

idk what the point of life is sometimes
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I dont know that there is a point other than living to create meaning; which enables us to inhabit and pass on this energy. There is a universal connection between us; as we all encounter the same loss but it effects us all for different reasons. We can either let it destroy/divide us, or join/connect together and this enables us to re-connect with ourselves. You are certainly not alone my friend. <3
 
I rarely fight it, I just give into it until it passes. I am in my 40's and its been going on all my life, so I am sort of used to it.
 
You pick yourself up, dust yourself down and start all over again.
Failing that, what you need to do is to learn how to have a better relationship with yourself. I know you are probably thinking "who is this prick, things are not that easy", but i believe that when you explore who you are and discover great things about yourself then you can begin to fight that hopelesness.
Or do this tomorrow, wherever you are, as you pass an old person or couple say good morning or afternoon to them, smile at someone,who gives a shit if they don't smile back, you are amazing. Help an old lady across the road, sing a song out loud in the street, tell yourself that you are a great person, go to a charity shop and buy a funny hat and dance down the street, look in the mirror and compliment yourself, just be.
NO ONE should be made to feel down i mean yes we all get down but we gotta get up too (naturally of course)
If all else fails see someone professional and when you are on the way there do all of the above. Make a hobo a sandwich or some moonshine, just try.SHA-MONE.
 
I think that's actually good advice Paul. All those things you mentioned are things I don't do and find very difficulty to do. If I catch myself bobbing my head while listening to music as I walk down the street I get embarassed and immediately stop. Singing in public, you can forget about it! But I'll try to take your advice, I'll try to smile at some strangers tomorrow. Cept I always feel like my smiles look more like grimaces. :P
 
IDK. lol. I always think of Joe Dirt when he says "just gotta keep on keepin on" Only cause thinkin about him makes me laugh a lil and because he's right.
 
Yea, I will often tell myself to "keep on trucking." It works alright, sometimes.

Roll with the punches...story of my life.
 
So many great responses!

I guess the theme would be you fight hopelessness by not fighting it, you feel it, you accept it, then you realize that it's just a feeling and that it will pass. Try not to over identify with the feeling of hopelessness because you will only attract more of that feeling. It will pass, it can pass very quickly at times.

Really feel your feelings and try not to bottle things up too much and isolate yourself too much. I've noticed my depressed/anxiety ridden hopeless phases usually come at times when I've been suppressing some emotion or problem that needed to be dealt with or at least felt. When I deal with my problems I can let them go and I'm free to experience the next moment without being shackled to some nagging sense of depression and hopelessness.

I find that just scheduling regular times to see friends or go out for coffee help a ton. I know first hand how hard it can be, there was a year or so there where I really didn't see the point in living, life hasn't gotten any easier either I've just decided there are too many things to live for and I don't want to spend any more time feeling depressed if I can avoid it in a healthy way.

I've been slowly coming off opiates and benzos and it's a bit like coming back into focus after being in a cloud for a few years, or like coming back to earth after being in space for a good while. It's easy for me to get discouraged and want to just get high to forget about my problems but it doesn't do any good. Life is very beautiful when it's not clouded by drugs and depression but it's new to me to deal with life through these new clearer lenses. I guess when you see more light you become more motivated to become a part of it, I couldn't even see it for a long time.

Just accept yourself as you are, read some eastern philosophy, enjoy the simple things and try to let go of the past and your preconceived ideas of what the present or future should be like and life is a little easier to handle. Also more fun. Goals are important too, but just try to get past the hopelessness first, that should be goal number 1!

Anyway, that's how I've been dealing with it lately, I think alot of it just comes with experience and growing up too. I don't take antidepressants but some people find those to be helpful. Ultimately I don't think the answer is going to be found in any chemical though.


http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PkkCbzng8Ws&feature=fvsr

Or just listen to this song by Wilco "How To Fight Loneliness"
 
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IME, the best way to fight hopelessness is not to give yourself time to feel hopeless. Try to just be engaged with everything from moment to moment and live life to the best of your ability, no matter what the bare events happening.

The trick is all in your attitude. It's SO huge. The garbage man sees dollar signs when he looks at what I just want to get rid of. HUGE. So important compared to the bare events of life, that a major attitude change can make the most boring, meaningless life utterly meaningful and significant.

A lot of it is in acceptance, IMO. We're all in the same boat... all you can do is accept and make the best of it. Keep moving.

Keep moving.

Keep moving.

Keep moving.

Don't stop to think and you won't get hopeless.

Keep moving.

Keep moving....

.......

Peace...
 
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