closeau
Bluelighter
Thirsting. Haven't craved alcohol in over 3 years suddenly I find myself staying at the beach with my dad after o long hospital stay and my uncle and his family happen to be on town I haven't seen them in 20 years so we're all out to eat at water and everyone is at the bar waiting at the bar drinking except me and my cousins 7 year old daughter this is bullshit man I said I didn't want to come bc my fiancé who lives in LA has been at the Dr getting tests all day nothing conclusive yet but it could be serious and my narcisitic asshole father guilt tripped me and I gave in due to family obligation their leaving tomorrow ill never see them again I'm sure just bad timing. It's stress, my obsession from my alcoholism, and just plain wanting to have a drink socially by the water I rekon shit I don't matter. Def prob not the place to vent but it was the first thread that popped up in threads I posted didn't mean to explain my life story, lol. I'm out in parking lot smoking waiting for her to call me and about to call another person in recovery probably the right thing to do even though I know I won't drink that's not the point thatcobsession amsxares the shit out of me just when you think j God has relieved you from it blam smack in your face no worries I have something better than booze waiting for me as my reward and eat more safer nothing nefarious just a coping skill I guess you would call it. My apologies BL family I love this thread no mean to abuse it but yeah, thrirstibg right now I can taste just what happens to be my favorite Irish beer on tap. Great. Perhaps a test of my resolve e I can tell you one thing if it weren't for you Vera Bahavokova I would def be drunk as shit by the end of that night you continue to save my life just by breathing yourself. I know you'll see this at some point in next few days this is where we met fitting this is where we could w together again. Hope everyone is well
