How are you in one word v. Pedalling through the dark currents

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Amazed - My life has improved a lot after tapering benzos and quitting caffeine. My emotions are back, no anxiety and i just want to embrace the whole world, feel the nice warm spring wind in my face and smile to everyone and help everyone.
 
Amazed - My life has improved a lot after tapering benzos and quitting caffeine. My emotions are back, no anxiety and i just want to embrace the whole world, feel the nice warm spring wind in my face and smile to everyone and help everyone.

That's great! :)

I rarely use benzos now - maybe 1x per month or less frequently, as I have stayed away from daily use.
 
Stressed. I have an 8 page paper to write by tomorrow afternoon, then a chemistry test which I have yet to seriously prepare for.
 
Well there you go! As kind hearted as some people are, it's more important to work on everything you need to. I think that she'll be able to understand that.

^Wise words! ;)
Am sure she will...:)



Amazed - My life has improved a lot after tapering benzos and quitting caffeine. My emotions are back, no anxiety and i just want to embrace the whole world, feel the nice warm spring wind in my face and smile to everyone and help everyone.

Wow! Awesome you feel so good, am delighted for you-dont forget this and pocket it for the more challenging times!

ATM- Intrapersonal
 
out of it: I am just sitting here wondering why I am still up? I honestly cannot answer that question.
 
" ^scream, my brother, scream. "

honestly, im such a fucking wreck, honestly i can hardly speak correctly, or finish a sentence with out pulling my hair.... im not kidding. weeks on end.

.....
^screaming right there, little
 
numb:(

my whole right arm is gone cause I missed 1/2 way thru apparently. never had trouble before...and can't afford new gear either. fml seriously

that's pretty shitty ): well mistakes do happen.... hope you can get some new gear soon it's not good to reuse.
 
skin-to-bones-hungry...
...I have no reserve fat left on my body, I'm sure of it... can't wait until pay-day tomorrow... WOW! I already know what I'm having for lunch tomorrow! I can already taste it, and feel it doing wonders to my energy levels. And I sure as hell hope that this time around, that my money finds it's way to buy some gifts for my sisters and not some benzos or opiates for me.
 
skin-to-bones-hungry...
...I have no reserve fat left on my body, I'm sure of it... can't wait until pay-day tomorrow... WOW! I already know what I'm having for lunch tomorrow! I can already taste it, and feel it doing wonders to my energy levels. And I sure as hell hope that this time around, that my money finds it's way to buy some gifts for my sisters and not some benzos or opiates for me.


I remember the craving for food, I indulge myself whenever I can since I never eati. and the love of a sister. younger or older? my sis has been prob the one reason I am still alive today. I lied, thinking of her "god" given problems versus me
me and self mutation. my sister has been eveyrhung and I miss taking granted of that
 
procrastinating :|
Like, really really badly. I've got this essay due on Monday on a topic which is genuinely the stupidest, most ridiculous topic I have ever come across, and I haven't even really started writing yet. I'm just gonna wing it over the weekend and hope that I come up with something worthwhile..... :X
 
FUCKED.
Random piss test at work, I tested positive for something that I have a legitimate prescription for, and they still said they'd have to send it to the lab for a GC/MS screen to confirm that its indeed adderall and not "other amphetamines". I also tested positive for a slight amount of methamphetamine, but I've never used meth in my life, nor have I taken any random pills that could have contained it. I know its from the OTC asthma meds I use containing ephedrine, cause it can false positive for meth. Either way, it's bullshit. I'm not allowed to go back to work for 3 days til the results come back, and although I didn't use any goddamn illegal drugs, but I'm not getting paid for the days I'm forced to take off. I'm being punished for using meds for legitimate conditions. I'm sorry, motherfuckers. On top of that, the manager who I had to tell the situation to was apparently talking shit about people who are prescribed adderall after I left, saying no one is legit, no one has ADHD, that they just say they can't focus and get it rx'd.

Needless to say I'm fucking pissed and plan on letting everyone know that this is fucking bullshit when I get back to work.
 
Sick, tired, hungry: Been up for hours now... I tried to sleep but ended up just staring at the ceiling the whole time. So now I'm up back on the computer all out of it. I want to grab something to eat but I'm too sick to even try to put anything in my stomach. Also my mom is sleeping on the couch so I don't want to wake the beast haha.

I'm going to now go throw up in the bathroom...
 
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