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  • TDS Moderators: AlphaMethylPhenyl | paranoid android

How are you in one word? v. 2012

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methadoned

got my script today yay! 5mg QID (120x5mg). Not sure why It isn't 10mg BID, but whatever, same thing Just annoyed the doc charges 5 bucks for the prescription pick up.
 
RedLeader said:
uncomfortable

Was watching a movie that somehow managed to trigger some bad memories, and now I'm battling some PTS. Ugh, and I was having a good evening too. I'm trying to stay busy, but my mind keeps obsessively flashing images into my head.

:(
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i have been having awful flashbacks and night terrors since i was assaulted and practically abused while on the pschward. i feel your pain. try taking up a new hobbie to keep your mind busy it helps and meditation too <3
 
Stable no mood lift, kinda craving something i shouldnt be:!
@ least got the plan for a big cook off this arvo and get some meals ready to be frozen down. WHole food shop this week, Im not sure if im exited or not..... Im a chef though i can make anything not taste like shit:D
 
Anxious.

I have the package ready and it will be mailed out tomorrow, but I have a feeling nothing is going to change besides the fact that I gave away a few things that mean something to me. Gave away things to someone who may not even give a fuck about anything I sent. I dunno why I'm second guessing myself, but I feel like I may be hurting myself by doing this. Though, if I don't do this I feel like I'll be mad at myself for not trying everything I can. Ugh, being a human is so complicated. I wish I could just get past all this confusing life BS and just be happy. I just want to have 1 year where I can call it a 100% successful year, where I was happy. I don' think that is to much to ask, neither imo is finding someone who will take my love and give me the same in return. I love falling in love with someone, but the whole arena surrounding love seems to cause me nothing but pain.

I guess like everyone who is older than me will say, "you are still young, don't let this stop you from searching for what you desire".

One day at a time.
 
Accomplished got half the cooking done i wanted to looks like a nice dinner tonite!! (my appitite has been a bit better the longer ive been off those damn antidepressants) still need a toke though:|
 
I'm going to be making some Eastern Carolina Style BBQ (slow cooked pork tenderloin, pulled, with a vinegar based sauce) for tomorrows dinner. Should be fannnnntastic, and a little taste of home.
 
^ sounds devine Splat!!:)
Im hangin right now 2 hrs b4 the gf comes around, id really love a ciggerette but the E-cigs are doin the job, just goin thru em like lollies8o
 
S.M.F.G said:
Accomplished got half the cooking done i wanted to looks like a nice dinner tonite!! (my appitite has been a bit better the longer ive been off those damn antidepressants) still need a toke though:|
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good stuff man, cooking a good meal can be really therapeutic, i cooked a whole baked snapper last night as a welcome home dish for my gf, was delicous, shame she left today because of me be a fuckwit
 
Sore. Confuzius says: Never promise a friend to help him move when you know he owns a stairmaster and a massive 2x1 m glass table. Never.
 
S.M.F.G said:
^ sounds devine Splat!!:)
Im hangin right now 2 hrs b4 the gf comes around, id really love a ciggerette but the E-cigs are doin the job, just goin thru em like lollies8o
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Totally normal. The first week I used a e-cig I was steaming all day, til I felt dizzy. Subsides with time...
 
Quiet.

Or rather even quieter than normal. Usually I'm quiet until I have something worth saying, but nothing has felt worth saying this week...

VanWeyden said:
Totally normal. The first week I used a e-cig I was steaming all day, til I felt dizzy. Subsides with time...
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Totally agree with this. I also dunno what rig you're using, but it felt a lot better and subsided when I had an e-cig that I could get a good lung full of vape from. The cheaper ones I started off on were harder to do that with unless I taped one of the draw holes through to the atty shut. That said I'm still bad and sneak an odd cig in most days >.<
 
Keeping myself busy. I finally got a couple things to preoccupy my time so I'm not sitting around the house just purely bored feeling hopeless. It is nice to keep my mind off a couple things, especially now I am waiting 4-5 days to see if I'll be getting a call for the package I mailed out today or not. Rather not spend the next couple days speculating when I can only do one thing, which is wait and have some patience.
 
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