Currently feeling: incredulous.
My mum is in the hospital and given the fact that she attempted to through herself a pity party for her oh so horrible 'depression' (that I supposedly have worse than she does), and acted as though she was going through opiate withdrawals again last night, I feel more angry and distrusting than concerned. How the hell am I supposed to sit here and feel concerned for a mother that tried to off herself with pills on MOTHER'S DAY when I was 18 and found her bawling in her goddamn bed? How the hell am I supposed to feel concerned about someone who is always missing work to lock herself in her fucking room, and continuously exhibit immature irrational childish behaviour. She is always fine every single fucking time something like this happens other than the fact that she makes herself fucking ill—physically and mentally. Every time she is ill now it is the result of her abusing her fucking pain medication, and every single time SHE gets ill it's the end of the goddamn world and straight to the ER. Yet when I needed legitimate help with my health, I got nothing. I love my mum, but after this statement, I am no longer wasting my time or energy on wondering whether or not this is something to be concerned about this time around.