Cramped
and cold here,
haunted by ghosts
and monsters
warmed only by
the memories of you
and all that
you make me
want to be.
I talked hopeless
again today about myself,
and a friend of mine told me
to be patient,
and I thought for a moment
that I am patient:
I've waited so long and I --
-- but then I realized that I
wait so long and then
finally push myself to go
only to stop short when
reality discourages me.
So I'll try harder now to
keep my head up again,
to keep trying and run on
patience and Will.
I just can't take it
when I hear your beautiful voice
over the telephone,
picture your beautiful face,
imagine your ocean blue eyes
staring into my shit-brown ones,
and seeing how I haven't changed
all these years, how far I
haven't come.
You're looking for
something I want to be,
and I still can't get
passed myself,
I still can't live in the moment.
I still just live in my head.
Still haunted by ghosts
I cannot banish,
still fighting monsters
against which
I seem so powerless.
I want so much more,
but I guess
you got to give a little
to get a little,
but I feel like I've got so little to spare
and so much to loose
and yet it seems
so clear that you mean
everything to me.
So strange it is that
I'm so afraid to let go of
nothing at all,
nothing at all,
to accomplish so much more
and have a chance at
holding everything.
and cold here,
haunted by ghosts
and monsters
warmed only by
the memories of you
and all that
you make me
want to be.
I talked hopeless
again today about myself,
and a friend of mine told me
to be patient,
and I thought for a moment
that I am patient:
I've waited so long and I --
-- but then I realized that I
wait so long and then
finally push myself to go
only to stop short when
reality discourages me.
So I'll try harder now to
keep my head up again,
to keep trying and run on
patience and Will.
I just can't take it
when I hear your beautiful voice
over the telephone,
picture your beautiful face,
imagine your ocean blue eyes
staring into my shit-brown ones,
and seeing how I haven't changed
all these years, how far I
haven't come.
You're looking for
something I want to be,
and I still can't get
passed myself,
I still can't live in the moment.
I still just live in my head.
Still haunted by ghosts
I cannot banish,
still fighting monsters
against which
I seem so powerless.
I want so much more,
but I guess
you got to give a little
to get a little,
but I feel like I've got so little to spare
and so much to loose
and yet it seems
so clear that you mean
everything to me.
So strange it is that
I'm so afraid to let go of
nothing at all,
nothing at all,
to accomplish so much more
and have a chance at
holding everything.
