I am not a recreational drug user at all. I doubt anyone will understand my story, but if someone does, all the better: I have been looking for someone to relate to all of my life.
LSD was slipped on me when I was 12 (long ago). It left me with severe PTSD, flashbacks and anxiety. My movements are extremely restricted because of the free-flowing fear I experience. I suffer from a conditioned response like Pavlov's dogs. When on the LSD I ran home and escaped through sleep. Decades later, when the flashbacks come I still instinctually seek relief in the same way, so I have been condition to stay near home. The thought of travel seems impossible because I fear having flashbacks even 20 miles from my home.
When I imagine being able to knock myself out in the event of a flashback, I can imagine myself able to do anything and travel anywhere.
Anyone out there with experience in sedative drugs, have any ideas? I am willing to learn how to inject myself, but snorting would be my preferred choice. My ideal solution would knock me out cold as near to instantly as possible and uses a legal drug (prescription as opposed to heroine, for example).
A likely scenario I would be using this in is one which I am driving. I would find a place to park, crawl into the back of my van, and out goes the lights. I would not be able to be seen by a cop looking into my windows, but if somehow I was discovered and arrested, I would like to be charged with being impair while in a vehicle rather than in possession of a heavy duty illegal drug. Thanks for all who read this and all who can offer advice.
LSD was slipped on me when I was 12 (long ago). It left me with severe PTSD, flashbacks and anxiety. My movements are extremely restricted because of the free-flowing fear I experience. I suffer from a conditioned response like Pavlov's dogs. When on the LSD I ran home and escaped through sleep. Decades later, when the flashbacks come I still instinctually seek relief in the same way, so I have been condition to stay near home. The thought of travel seems impossible because I fear having flashbacks even 20 miles from my home.
When I imagine being able to knock myself out in the event of a flashback, I can imagine myself able to do anything and travel anywhere.
Anyone out there with experience in sedative drugs, have any ideas? I am willing to learn how to inject myself, but snorting would be my preferred choice. My ideal solution would knock me out cold as near to instantly as possible and uses a legal drug (prescription as opposed to heroine, for example).
A likely scenario I would be using this in is one which I am driving. I would find a place to park, crawl into the back of my van, and out goes the lights. I would not be able to be seen by a cop looking into my windows, but if somehow I was discovered and arrested, I would like to be charged with being impair while in a vehicle rather than in possession of a heavy duty illegal drug. Thanks for all who read this and all who can offer advice.
