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Hey wherez all the drugz at (Church hello thread)?

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Awwww, WOW!!!! You guys are fucking awesome!!!! I love you all so much, even though we're all just screen names and avatars to each other!

It has definitely been a long time since I've logged in here... I have been very busy lately. VERY busy. And a lot of stuff has been going on in my life, too. I have totally stuck to my guns on the big life-change. I haven't taken any psychedelics since the last trip I wrote about. I've even stopped smoking pot as much as I used to. I am going back to school soon, to get my bachelor's degree, which I believe will help give me the knowledge I need to be a better businessman. Just, basically, things have really been interesting in my life lately. I know for a fact that I will eventually take another trip or two in my life, but ever since the 4-aco-dmt trip I haven't even really thought about it.

Beenhead, I haven't forgotten about you, man. I know you live nearby me, and I plan on hopefully meeting up and going fishing with you one of these days, I swear!

Gen E, I love you and your cuteness. Maybe later on when I have more time I'll log back in and see if you posted any recent pics of your cha-cha... Mmmmm, cha-cha.

Ximot, Xorkoth, Willow, ninjadan, and everyone else who posted nice things about me, I mean it when I say it: I miss you all. I miss being here for people, and I miss being a nazi mod. I really care about people. I really care about people using drugs safely and responsibly. I really enjoy my presence being appreciated in one way or another, and logging in (on a whim!) today caused me to get a little emotional. I really love this place. It's just hard to be around as much as I used to, since I'm not journeying anymore.

But for what it's worth, I think about this place all the time. And when I say "this place" I mean this forum specifically, although I sorta mean "bluelight" in general.

Thanks for making me feel special.

And thanks to the gods for suggesting that I come to bluelight today. I was bored and had a computer nearby.

Be safe, everyone.

I'll be back, I promise. I'll even promise to make an effort to check here more frequently!
 
don't fool yourself girl it's goin in your poop shoot, RAM IT! RAM IT! RAM IT! RAM IT UP YOUR POOP SHOOT! RAM IT! RAM IT! RAM IT! RAM IT UP YOUR POOP SHOOT!

zappa anyone?
 
there you are! aim me or something, i really would like to talk to you again, and get together. glad everything is going so well for you <3
 
What up church, love the personal quote.....
Personal Quote:
I fed some acid to a glass of orange juice once, and now it thinks it's a person.
LMAO!
 
Good to see you dropping by, Church :D

I applaud everybody who's finding success in working towards and maintaining sobriety. I've been cutting down my usage as well.
 
not to take away from church, but he hold nothing to phreex in terms of being a nazi. has anyone on this forum been around long enough to remember him ;) and yeah this thread was fucking funny
 
I modded alongside PhreeX, and yes, nobody can hold a candle to him.
 
Dang, it's been a while, but I'm glad to see that my hello thread is still here! Anyway I have a lot to say so here it is:

I think I should start off by saying that it is very hard to find the strength (or motivation?) to come here and visit. I don't know if you guys know this or not, but when you aren't using drugs, it's hard to hang out here. There, I said it. It's just, I've been off psychedelics for a long time, and I'm enjoying life, but yet I miss the fuck out of them, which makes this place just one big peer-pressure machine for me. Okay, I'm exaggerating, but the truth is, I fucking miss my psychedelics!

And another thing, which I'm sure some of you may know, but I guarantee not all of you: When you use psychedelics profusely for almost a 12 year period, then you suddenly stop... you kinda start noticing your brain changing a bit too. It's nothing at all like "withdrawing," like if I were jonesing for a cigarette or something (unfortunately I still smoke cigs, YUCK!)... it's just, well, for instance, did you know that the movie "A Scanner, Darkly" really just makes no sense whatsoever? Neither did I! Because it made SOOOO much sense back when I was dropping acid every week. But the thing is, my memories of the way I interpreted the movie while I was tripping are still in tact. I mean, I still have full, conscious awareness of the way I perceived what was going on at the time I first saw that movie. In other words, it's not like all the revelations and perceptions I had have just gone away or something. But the truth is, they don't really stay in the forefront of my mind.

But the thing is, I still have the same "abilities" (for lack of a better word) that I developed when I was a chronic LSD user. It's just, not automatic anymore. I have to sort of flip a switch in order to see things through the eyes of a mind that has been touched by psychedelics. That's not such a bad thing, either. It was something I worried about, because psychedelics contributed to my worldview, and I was afraid that my entire worldview would slip away. But it hasn't, and now, from a grounded/sober point of view, I can laugh at how silly it ever was to think of in the first place.

I'm totally rambling, and I know it. I don't really know what to say, other than I miss being here, and Beenhead wants to beat me up. This is how that makes me feel:

crybaby%20crying%20kid%20cry%20tear%20tears%20Above%20the%20Law%20blog.jpg


... and I just want it to be known that I didn't realize how much my priorities and interests would change, just from stopping the use of drugs. It's like, I totally love this place, but I feel like an outsider now. I never have a hankerin' to come socialize here anymore. I don't really prefer to carry on conversations about psychs (or drugs in general, I guess) because it makes me sad and I long for the experiences I was having yester-year. But the truth is, I rather enjoy being "sober."

I hate using that word in this context. Isn't there a better word someone could invent, that means sober, but only to psychedelics? Because the word sober seems to immediately imply alcohol. What I mean is I'm enjoying life on the ground. It's so different to me... I guess because I had been tripping a LOT for so LONG. I mean, I actually feel like I get HIGH again when I smoke bud! It used to, for the longest time, just help to make me feel grounded and "normal." Also, I rarely ever drink anymore. I have my nightly glass of merlot with my dinner, but other than that, barely anything else.

Of course, that makes me the designated driver wherever I go, which makes me feel like this:

temper-tantrum.jpg


Okay, so after reading through what I've typed it's obvious that I really have nothing to say. So let it be known that I miss this place, and it's hard to deal with the dichotomy of being a psyychedelic user that doesn't use psychedelics. I think it's safe to say that I'm not a regular here anymore. But I just hope that I can always have friends here and that you guys will always remember me and not just cast me aside as "that damn fucker church that thinks he's too good for drugs now" or whatever.

I will always be an acid head at heart.

I miss you all, I love you all, especially all the chicks that post pictures of their titties in the nudie thread, and I'll be back again from time to time.

Take care of yourselves, and feel free to keep PM'ing me... just don't get mad if it takes several months to get back to you!

:)
 
you'll always be welcomed back here with open arms, church. you have contributed so much not only to the site but to people's experiences as well. i have taken some of your advice and applied it to my life and my drug use. i doubt you'll ever be forgotten by those that knew you and/or remember you posting here. we all mature and change and moving on is a good thing, it just means that you're in a different place in life right now and hopefully that place is a good one. as long as you're happy and doing well, what difference does it make if you're using psychs or not? if you feel you're better off without them and you're enjoying life "sober" then by all means, keep doing waht you're doign and don't regret a fucking minute of it.

i miss you dearly and i wish you would visit more often but i suppose i could take the initiative and send you an email or 2 every once in a while and of course, you have a life to live. it's nice to see you come back to check in, no matter how infrequent the visits may be. i think a lot of people, including myself, looked up to you because of your wisdom and insight regarding psychs. you were an asset to this forum, and the bluelight community and of course, you're a great person as well <3

oh, and where's the song you wrote for me? i'm still waiting :(
 
Nice to hear you are doing well!

Also, excellent use of those pictures to exemplify your feelings!
 
that damn fucker church thinks he's too good for drugs now. :!

always good to hear from ye mate. how's things going with that young filly, have you filled her with little church babies yet? :)
 
Damn, Kay, I'm sorry, I completely forgot I was supposed to write a song for you. Okay, I'll get back on it. Thing is, I just moved, and I now have my own house (yippee!!), so I can finally setup my recording studio IN MY OWN HOUSE!!! Which means, I'll be a workaholic again soon.

You will be first on my list of things to do.

... and the song, too. ;)


pr0ficient: thanks! I've always liked matching up random Google Images pictures with my in-the-moment feelings. Thanks for noticing!

And Felix: I'm still with her. We now live together, and fortunately [so far] I don't have any little churchlings running around. Although I could use a few, to do all the housework that this new house of mine is in need of!
 
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especially all the chicks that post pictures of their titties in the nudie thread, and I'll be back again from time to time.

There's a nudie thread? 8o Since when?

I totally agree about "A Scanner Darkly" I thought it was a mess, "Waking Life" on the other hand, brilliant!

How's the music going?


:)
 
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