WOW it's been a long time. Do I need to introduce myself for all the people who don't know me anymore? Well, my name's Church, I used to moderate here (much to many people's dismay), and I stepped down on the day that I realized psychedelics have taught me what I needed to know to move on to the next phase of my life.
I was so attached to this place I couldn't imagine NOT logging in and continuing my existence here. Yet, immediately after removing psychedelics from my life, I knew I wouldn't be coming back very often at all. Now I can safely say that, I was fooling myself all along-- I more than likely will only be coming back here every once in a blue moon, just for old times' sake. And that leads me to today.
How is everyone doing? I miss it here, definitely, but truthfully I gotta tell you all: I don't really miss taking psychedelics! Here I am, years after the last trip I've taken, and I simply have no desire to trip. Whether that is good or bad makes no difference to me. It simply is what it is. But lately I've been thinking that maybe people could benefit from hearing my story? Maybe there are other people here who, much like myself at the time, have contemplated stopping psychedelic intake, but are "afraid" that they might lose their identities, as if the psychedelics are what made them into who they are.
I used to feel that way. I was almost "dependent" on psychedelics to keep reaffirming who I am, and my awareness of being aware. You can go back and read all of my previous posts and get the history. I am not ashamed of any of it at all. I still hold psychedelics as being the sacred gems that they are, and will always spread the message to the people who need it. I will always go on record as saying that psychedelics (specifically LSD) saved my life and kept me afloat. But I never accounted for an eventuality where I would feel that I've gotten all I can get from them, and graduate and move on. Yet, that's exactly what happened.
And here I am today, still educating people about psychedelic therapy in my personal life, even though I've personally gotten off that ride. I just feel like it's important for people to know that
if they want to stop taking psychedelics, they can do so, without fear of losing the knowledge and perceptions they gained by using psychs in the first place.
I can tell that I am not as "psychedelicized" as I used to be. Okay. I'll admit to that. There are many thoughts and feelings I had back in the day which I look back on now and think to myself, "Damn I was using a lot of acid back then!!" But my cessation has not caused me to become someone other than who I am. I simply have a different perception of events that took place in the past, that's all.
And I used to worry about that specifically. Like, "One day I'm gonna stop using acid and I'm gonna look back on my life and feel like I was living in a fantasy world." But I do NOT feel that way. Suprisingly. I still feel like I had paranormal experiences, and that they weren't just hallucinations. I still remember the overall message I was getting from Venus (or the UFO, or whatever it was) on the night that I took pure MDMA by myself in silence, outside by the pool, and just stared at the sky. I still believe that the "two guys" I repeatedly saw ONLY on nights I was tripping were some kind of "peeling back of the layers of reality" by my higher self, or God, or whatever you want to call it. I still interpret all of those events in the same way as always... I'm just a bit more involved with the 3D world these days, that's all.
I really enjoy life. I enjoy having epiphanies and not thinking to myself, "I wonder if it only feels important because I'm on acid?" I just enjoy knowing that I had all those experiences, gained plenty of knowledge, and am still here today. But most importantly, I enjoy feeling like all my MANY years of OVER-usage of psychedelics have left little to no negative after-effects in my life.
I gotta tell you, folks, for what it's worth, even though I could be an anomaly: I don't have emotional problems. I don't see trails and tracers in my day-to-day vision. I don't have flashbacks... wait, that's not true, I do have flashbacks, but SURPRISE SURPRISE they are not of LSD trips, but rather MDMA trips... I also don't have any HPDD symptoms.
Quite frankly, I just feel like a healthy 31 year old guy who has a STRONG grip on reality.
And I'm sorry that I'm not around anymore. But at the same time, I'm not gonna fake like I belong here, when I don't. Not that I think I don't belong here, but I just mean, oh I don't know what words to use.
Just know, everyone, that psychedelics have the potential to heal oneself. It worked on me. But the trick is you have to know when the healing has completed itself, and when it's just time to pick up your stuff and move on. My time had come, and I thank God I listened.
I'm sure I'll sign back in again in another year or two. I wish everyone the best.
Keep searching for meaning in EVERYTHING, y'all. There's so much of it there, it's not even funny!
Even nothing is something, sometimes 
