help..

[sconnie420]

So, within the last month my LTR has come to an end..I'm dealing w/ it, I've accepted it and I will learn from it.. I need help w/ suggestions on how to forget.. I've been keeping busy, but I did have to move back home for the time being..

Also, not that I'm going to rush in2 anything, how do you meet people? I dnt go to the bars and wouldn't want to meet anyone there anyways.. I don't want children, which I'd imagine could present a problem.. I'm going to take time for me, but am still a little scared of being alone 4evr..

Sorry for the rant, any help would be appreciated.

 

[Pagey]

Hey sconnie, I'm sorry to hear you're having to go through this. It's always tough but when I got out of mine a year ago I thought it helped to tell myself that break-ups are an almost universal thing, and almost everyone has to go through it at some point or another - and almost everyone survives and gets over it. I think it's reassuring to tell yourself that.
Also, with every day that passes try to compare how you're feeilng to how you were straight after the break-up. I'm hoping you feel better since then, in which case just keep your progress in mind.
Keeping busy really is the best thing to do - find a routine and stick to it. That'll help you realise that you can still lead a 'real' life without this guy.
Might get a lot of disagreement with this but I found that having a rebound really did help. Not necessarily sex, but just hanging out with another guy - even if nothing more than friendship is involved. Also IME/from what I've heard from my friends, you're likely gonna be extra-sensitiv to men in the next few months so if you meet new ones anytime soon it's likely you'll develop some kinda feelings for at least one of them...which does really help get your midn off things.

As for how to meet people...bars, classes, work are probably the 3 things I'd throw out there. If you can afford it/would like to you can always sign up at some sort of weekly class or something, which not only helps you meet people (plus they would share at least one interest in common with you), but will probably help getting over the whole thing. A gym could also work.

Stay strong and remember it gets just a little bit easier with every day that passes

 

[JerseysOwn]

You could always try online dating just because it says online dating doesn't mean people aren't on there looking for friends.

 

[llama112]

Breakups suck, even if that's the way it's supposed to go. *hugs*

What you should do right now - stay busy. Don't give yourself much time to "think" about what happened. Stay busy! Hang out with friends. Get really involved in work, or school, or hobbies. Try something new. Maybe there was something you've been wanting to do for a while but haven't gotten around to it - just go for it now. Focus on yourself - maybe go to the spa or something, pamper yourself. Going to the gym can help.

How to meet new guys in the future - online dating is certainly an option. I'm not sure if you go to school or work or what, but that's a place you can meet guys. Through mutual friends as well. Do you have any hobbies? Do you do any activities? Meeting guys through that can be helpful. You could try something new. If you're artsy, try a pottery class. If you're athletic, try some sports class that you've never done before. Meet new people there!

 

[iheartthisthread]

You won't just forget. It takes time. Doing things that YOU enjoy will certainly distract you from dwelling on it. As time goes by it gets easier. As far as the next one, they usually just fall in your lap.

 

[Dbeats]

Agree 100% with iheart...suffered a breakup after a 6 year relationship last year and still think about her sometimes, but at the beginning it was pretty constant. Pretty much the only thing that helped was time, and talking to my friends who had gone through the same thing (and opiates...but I don't advise that).