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Help with this poem please!!!!

xXBuddahXx

Bluelighter
Joined
Apr 19, 2007
Messages
36
Location
Eastern USA
OK i have the idea of the poem but i dont know how to write it out, Its for a myspace background and ill give credit (RL name or Nick w/e) Its supossed to be a love poem.

OKay so the idea is, These two people love each other dearly, But the father of the girl severly hates the man she is in love with. So being seperated from her drives him insane, So he goes to the womans house where her and her father lives. Kills the father and cuts out his heart to give to the woman and a token of his love.

Lol see i have a good idea, its just that im not good with poems. I need a way to put it in stanza or poem form w/e.

Please and thank you!!!!
 
Sorry about that, I didnt see the child board. But i have some already just need help fixing it, putting that polish on it.



Two lovers in a beautiful bliss
Family makes things go amiss

Separation makes the mind go wild
For she is the mother of his child

To the fathers house he creeps
To the room where he <word> sleeps ""Side note <word> means i think something should go there to make it sound right""

One quick slash
Knife to his breast
Takes from the body his beating soul ""Need a word that rhymes with chest breast etc. or something i can put meaning the same thing...""

A present to his love
The symbol of freedom

Then i get stuck i dont know how to end it.
 
Two lovers is a beautiful bliss
Family makes things go amis

Seperation causes the mind to go wild
For she is the mother of his child

To the father's house he creeps
In the bedroom where he sleeps

One quick slash
Blade to the brest
Steals the heart from his bleeding chest

Deciding what they must do
Suicide is what they knew

Two lovers in a beautiful bliss
Two lives end; in a bloody kiss


Final Version
 
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