sniper5252
Greenlighter
- Joined
- May 16, 2012
- Messages
- 14
Not sure if this is in the right area but I seem to be having a weird and annoying problem. I have been opiate free for 15 days but over the past 4 days have been getting really bad cravings. I have also been looking for reasons to go to the emergency room. I have gone to extreme lengths including hitting myself with a hammer and repeatedly punching myself to cause injuries. I really don't want to use opiates but subconsciously I am trying to injure myself and go to the ER for opiates. I feel like I also like the attention at the hospital. I do have a legit injury and can easily get opiates from my doctor whenever I want, but I do not have that desire. I only want to go to the ER and I know this is bad since I have been 29 times in the last 2 years, all for legit reasons that either resulted in admittance or surgery. I feel like I am going through Er "withdrawal" also.
I feel like an idiot for this but don't know what to do. I really want to stay off opiates but like I said, have this deep seated desire to go to the ER for opiates and attention. I know she will never say anything but I know that this is all taking a toll on my wife. She always goes with me too the ER and doctor's visits and all. She knows I want to stay off opiates and she is very reluctant to ask me if I want to go to the ER anymore, since I always get pain meds there. Even over the past week, when I have shown her the bruises i caused over my body, that I blammed on falls, she never asked if I wanted to go to the ER. She just said it will get better, it just takes time to heal. I really wanted her to say lets go to the ER, but I know why she didn't. I know all of this rambling probably doesn't make sense to anyone, but if it does and you can give me your thoughts on what I should do, I would greatly appreciate it. Thanks in advance.
I feel like an idiot for this but don't know what to do. I really want to stay off opiates but like I said, have this deep seated desire to go to the ER for opiates and attention. I know she will never say anything but I know that this is all taking a toll on my wife. She always goes with me too the ER and doctor's visits and all. She knows I want to stay off opiates and she is very reluctant to ask me if I want to go to the ER anymore, since I always get pain meds there. Even over the past week, when I have shown her the bruises i caused over my body, that I blammed on falls, she never asked if I wanted to go to the ER. She just said it will get better, it just takes time to heal. I really wanted her to say lets go to the ER, but I know why she didn't. I know all of this rambling probably doesn't make sense to anyone, but if it does and you can give me your thoughts on what I should do, I would greatly appreciate it. Thanks in advance.