nor'easter
Greenlighter
- Joined
- Jun 4, 2018
- Messages
- 13
I apologize for the long post ahead of time. I was a late a late comer to drug use, I seldomly smoked weed in high school but have always been a drinker. From 19ish on I started experimenting with drugs. Mostly benzos like Xanax and Kpins. Then I started with the cocaine and the ecstasy. In the college years, I had a roommate from New York who was into the Oxys. This was right when the 80s and higher milligram pills were disappearing so it was mostly 30s. We would cop, use them for a day or two and that was it. They quickly became my drug choice. Later in life, got a connection to somebody who had a script of 30s. It was cool, I could grab a handful or two of them, use and that would be it unitl the next month when the script got renewed. That buddy of mine died two years ago, he got into fentanyl and well…that was pretty much it for him. Just over a year ago, I ran into somebody who had a script of 15s. And then get this….his roommate has a script of 15s. The easy access and good price make it a dangerous situation. To make a long story short, Ive been getting fucked up for just over a year. Mostly daily with forced breaks when the prescription ran out a week early. I’m so disgusted with my self that I ended up in this situation. I’ve got a little boy and a wife. She knows about the usage and is there for me. My son looks up to me and I can’t be living like this. The guilt is killing me. My father was a dead beat heroin addict who only cared about himself and getting high and now look at me….Today is the first day I’ve jumped ship on them and really focused on stopping. I have tried this before but haven’t had success. I’m nervous to go and ask for help, I don’t know if having that label on my medical file is a good idea. I’m stuck in this cycle and I need help out. Any advice is more than welcome.