Thanks for very sound advice, blue/greenlighters!
I am doing much better. I had surgery and am thinking that it was a good thing because now at home recovering I don't need much speed. I have a small supply of opiates for pain and I haven't abused them for some odd reason. No more adderall. Couldn't get anymore and told the doc some of what was going on. I really wanted off of them. Im on ritalin and will take strattera soon. Ive stopped snorting since the surgery and I swore I will not do it again. My lungs filled up with fluid after the surgery and they don't need any more stress from snorting and intranasal fluid. I know that when all is well again I will want to abuse something again. But my intranasal use is gone. I think the adderall I will miss but it wasn't working well anyway and there was never enough of it so might as well get off the merry go round now.
Good luck to all of you. Bluelight is the best and the people are among some of the smartest and most empathetic people on the face of the Earth!