Antagonistix
Bluelighter
Hi everyone,
Although I've written a few posts and started a couple of threads, I thought an official intro would be useful and based on it, I gladly invite both positive and negative comments and/or advice.
Well I'l start by explaining that I am NOT dyslexic or something similar but its this damned android tablet that has an over sensitive keyboard and sometimes its predictive text handling quite often gets its prediction completely wrong. For example, if I want to typ"I'm", it puts "immediately instead. Anyone reading my posts will have noticed this already!
Anyway, about me.
Im prbabably older than most of you, suffice to say im over 40, but having said that i appear to share an affinity with you people on blue light, and certainly still feel. 20 something. But i do have a fair bit of experience with all kinds of "intoxicants", so I hope I can share some useful information that I've picked up along the way with there here. So i hope to give as much as I take.
I've drawn may line at shooting up. I've never put anything up my veins, except when i was on a morphine drip in hospital, which to be honest was probably a crappy dose cos it didn't really do much for me.
Now after the early part of my adult life, say 18 on wards, I mainly smoked cannabis, in one of its many forms. Skunk, moroccan, gold seal black etc..used to absolutely love it and was stoned pretty much 24/7. At that time i never really got into booze much, but enjoyed a binge session once in a while. Only ever socially though. Never drank when alone. Would rather smoke a j and listen to some music.When I got into university in London (QMC), things changed a bit. Started drinking more and smoking less, probably due to the circle of friends I had developed. Mostly straightblaced drinking chaps only.still I wouldn't say I was addicted to anything really. I could quite happily go out without any recreational drug/alcohol, I used to get a buzz frm social environments which did the trick.
My problems started when in changed course and started at wawrick uni.
Guess I got into a bad group of friends. Well bad for me anyway.
It started with very heavy use of weed, skunk type.it ended up such that the first thing id do upon waking was to do a spliff or a bong or chilum. I started to abuse the stuff almost every day, god knows how I managed to scrape the money together to do this but i remember having to go to the student welfare officer and beg for money claiming extreme poverty.
X
Very soon after experiments with other drugs started, well all affordable stuff anyway. Back in those days ecstacy was very new on the scene and pretty expensive per tablet, plus you never knew what was in themThe rave scene hadn't yet started so for us it was a special occasion like new years that we'd do it.
But we did way too much LSD, and i mean shed load. I've had my share of bad trips and wouldn't ever touch one of those again, im sure it can make you go insane. But then too much weed long term can screw you up mentally too, I know I've seen it multiple times.
Anyway I somehow graduated with an honours degree and got myself into a good career ladder. Got married, had kids, and this stopped the abuse but my problems only just were buried for a while.
I next got addicted to pain killers. They were called tylex. 500/30 apap/codiene.
Just one or two tablets used to give me a lovely buzz. But as u aol know tolerances of this increases and soon I was popping 10 at a time. I found the paracetamol ones gave me severe nausea so i switched to buying nurofen plus. At one stage I was taking almost 100 of those a day.
Anyway I now have a fucked up renal system, ie my kidneys don't work properly. I need to take supplimentsand I lose 30g of protein in mys urine daily, well some days anyway. But thankfully I don't need dialysis.
But im so addicted to opiates, I still buy a 32 Box of N+, almost daily
I need help here basically to get off them or I'll kill myself.
I already d a near fatal case o peritonitis due to the ibuprofen od's I was doing, basically my intestines burst, got infected and almost killed me.
Second biggest problem is im a bi insomnia which really does me over so I take zopiclone to sleep and once again my tolerance to it has grown and im taking too many.
What I really need is a safer method to achieve sleep, and a nicer, safer high to keep me satisfied.
So i hope u guys here will at least put me in the right direction. And noi can't any longer go to my doc and explain aol this or my career I finished. Even though right now im still recovering from peritonitis related correctional surgery and im claiming ESA, basically cos I've paid over 1 million in tac and NI in my career,theylok after me whilst im sick.
But I need to get better and for a start that means getting off the nurofen plus.....
Sorry, this has been along winded. Intro but I hope it serves its purpose.
So hello everyone.
All comments/questions most welcome.
Ant
Although I've written a few posts and started a couple of threads, I thought an official intro would be useful and based on it, I gladly invite both positive and negative comments and/or advice.
Well I'l start by explaining that I am NOT dyslexic or something similar but its this damned android tablet that has an over sensitive keyboard and sometimes its predictive text handling quite often gets its prediction completely wrong. For example, if I want to typ"I'm", it puts "immediately instead. Anyone reading my posts will have noticed this already!
Anyway, about me.
Im prbabably older than most of you, suffice to say im over 40, but having said that i appear to share an affinity with you people on blue light, and certainly still feel. 20 something. But i do have a fair bit of experience with all kinds of "intoxicants", so I hope I can share some useful information that I've picked up along the way with there here. So i hope to give as much as I take.
I've drawn may line at shooting up. I've never put anything up my veins, except when i was on a morphine drip in hospital, which to be honest was probably a crappy dose cos it didn't really do much for me.
Now after the early part of my adult life, say 18 on wards, I mainly smoked cannabis, in one of its many forms. Skunk, moroccan, gold seal black etc..used to absolutely love it and was stoned pretty much 24/7. At that time i never really got into booze much, but enjoyed a binge session once in a while. Only ever socially though. Never drank when alone. Would rather smoke a j and listen to some music.When I got into university in London (QMC), things changed a bit. Started drinking more and smoking less, probably due to the circle of friends I had developed. Mostly straightblaced drinking chaps only.still I wouldn't say I was addicted to anything really. I could quite happily go out without any recreational drug/alcohol, I used to get a buzz frm social environments which did the trick.
My problems started when in changed course and started at wawrick uni.
Guess I got into a bad group of friends. Well bad for me anyway.
It started with very heavy use of weed, skunk type.it ended up such that the first thing id do upon waking was to do a spliff or a bong or chilum. I started to abuse the stuff almost every day, god knows how I managed to scrape the money together to do this but i remember having to go to the student welfare officer and beg for money claiming extreme poverty.
X
Very soon after experiments with other drugs started, well all affordable stuff anyway. Back in those days ecstacy was very new on the scene and pretty expensive per tablet, plus you never knew what was in themThe rave scene hadn't yet started so for us it was a special occasion like new years that we'd do it.
But we did way too much LSD, and i mean shed load. I've had my share of bad trips and wouldn't ever touch one of those again, im sure it can make you go insane. But then too much weed long term can screw you up mentally too, I know I've seen it multiple times.
Anyway I somehow graduated with an honours degree and got myself into a good career ladder. Got married, had kids, and this stopped the abuse but my problems only just were buried for a while.
I next got addicted to pain killers. They were called tylex. 500/30 apap/codiene.
Just one or two tablets used to give me a lovely buzz. But as u aol know tolerances of this increases and soon I was popping 10 at a time. I found the paracetamol ones gave me severe nausea so i switched to buying nurofen plus. At one stage I was taking almost 100 of those a day.
Anyway I now have a fucked up renal system, ie my kidneys don't work properly. I need to take supplimentsand I lose 30g of protein in mys urine daily, well some days anyway. But thankfully I don't need dialysis.
But im so addicted to opiates, I still buy a 32 Box of N+, almost daily
I need help here basically to get off them or I'll kill myself.
I already d a near fatal case o peritonitis due to the ibuprofen od's I was doing, basically my intestines burst, got infected and almost killed me.
Second biggest problem is im a bi insomnia which really does me over so I take zopiclone to sleep and once again my tolerance to it has grown and im taking too many.
What I really need is a safer method to achieve sleep, and a nicer, safer high to keep me satisfied.
So i hope u guys here will at least put me in the right direction. And noi can't any longer go to my doc and explain aol this or my career I finished. Even though right now im still recovering from peritonitis related correctional surgery and im claiming ESA, basically cos I've paid over 1 million in tac and NI in my career,theylok after me whilst im sick.
But I need to get better and for a start that means getting off the nurofen plus.....
Sorry, this has been along winded. Intro but I hope it serves its purpose.
So hello everyone.
All comments/questions most welcome.
Ant
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