Hello all!

[Zulualphakilo]

Hi to everyone reading, i'm fairly new to all this and wasn't aware there was such an online community with so much help - I take my hat off to you all!
I am 21 years old and live just outside of London, England.
I have worked in sales for a number of years but am currently undergoing a complete overhaul and focusing on my true loves; music & fashion. Looking forward to seeing how chasing these two important outlets in my life progress.

There are a few things that bring me onto here that i'm hoping some of you might be able to point me in the direction of over the time I spend on here.
1. I am trying to stop my cocaine habit, it's not wildly out of control but am having some problems with mental illness and finding the comedown periods almost completely unbearable. I have previously had access to very affluent supply of it and it in turn has lead me to fall behind on rental agreements, lose two jobs, my driving licence and my happiness in general - all of which i'm coming to terms with. My problem is that I find it very very hard to deal with the cravings impossible once I've had a few drinks. I tried my first venture with diazepam on friday and passed out after doing some ketamine shortly after (I posted about this experience in the relevant thread) in hope that would help but I need something to truly help with the cravings, a go to. I want to be able to live my normal honest life without having the burden of craving looming over me.

2. I love ket, I think its great - so does my girlfriend and we both always have a great time on it together. I read a lot about going into 'k-holes' and don't think i've ever really been in one and I've always been a little scared of the idea of not having complete control over my conscious self, its also held me back from wanting to try the majority of psychedelics but I really must say I love the idea of them and want to try to experience them.

3. I can be a little shy to start off with - I promise i'm not always this boring!

 

[Zulualphakilo]

p.s also forgot to add that I had a beta blocker prescription from the docs a few days ago, (propanolol I think its called if my memory serves me well) this has to be by far the worst substance that I have ever put in my system & I was so angry at my doc for giving me them I haven't been to the follow up appointment and am anxious to call again to get another appointment. Any ideas what I should go back and request from him to fight anxiety?

 

[Papaverium]

Greetings, welcome to Bluelight!

For help keeping your cocaine use under control, we have a sub forum for Recovery Support with lots of folks who like to talk and help one another with quitting and cutting down.

As far as the beta blocker goes, those drugs are more used for blood pressure and heart issues as far as my knowledge goes. If the reason you are taking them is for anxiety I would suggest against that and possibly requesting a benzodiazepine if anxiety is the problem you are trying to fix, and benzos do help with lowering blood pressure and heart rate as well, so if that was an issue for you along with the anxiety, they may come in handy, but definitely talk to your doctor about the beta blockers and how they make you feel first before jumping to conclusions because your doctor may have another, more professional suggestion.