Just needed to go to the toilet, but not to the actual toilet toilet; no, that would have been way too boring. Ended up having a most enjoyable leak en plein air, squatting under an enormous rose bush, illuminated only by a string of purple LED solar-powered fairy lights and smoking a joint.
Did I mention that I'm off my tits?
Or that I have got to bake a pie?
EDIT: Decided I was feeling thirsty ans shouldd put back in one en what just came out the other end. But I wanted to do that outdoors, too, so I got out the "for when Jess gets a driving licence and a car and she can drive me to places ..... or just for cooking outdoors in the garden, special pyromaniac edition" monster of a Coleman Unleaded Camping Stove and the whistling kettle. Lit the stove OK, put the kettle on, went inside to get my cup, a teabag and a clicky sweetener ..... and then absent-mindedly clicked on the electric kettle, which boiled almost instantaneously as it is a three-kilowatter and plastic-bodied so it keeps its heat in, and finished the job of brewing up indoors. While the kettle outdoors was barely getting up any steam. Ho hum. Not going to waste a good cup of tea though, and it seems a shame to let the burner go cold. So just going to stick on some more clothes, and then I Have A Cunning Plan .....
FURTHER EDIT: First panload of steak is now browned (diced casserôle steak, it said on the package, but I haven't seen dice that size in a casino for the visually impaired. That meat was cut up by a man) on the Coleman stove. I'm now going to have another spliff, and another cup of tea this time from the outside kettle. Then I might have to revisit the rose bush, before the neighbours start getting active .....