Shambles
Bluelight Crew
That does sound terrifying. I know what you mean when you say how clear it was. Auditory hallucinations, including voices, are the norm for me during stim psychosis but the voices were always in a different room...
To be clear, I've had those kinda "voices" for years and, whilst acutely disconcerting, they are not what I am talking about at all. This was voices inside my head. They blocked out my own thoughts and internal monologue completely. This is what the big difference was. Whilst "voices" in the bogstandard stim psychosis sense are freaky and can get a person into some bad places this was of an entirely different order. Until you've had your ability to think completely obliterated by "voices" that "know" what you are saying before you can even try to think of - and response and actively prevent you from thinking ful stop - you really cannot know just how debilitating and downright terrifying it is. I'd never understood how or why anybody would ever feel they had to go along with whatever voices were telling them until I experienced it and discovered there really is no alternative. Anything to make it end. It's the ultimate form of rape in my opinion. Not even your own mind is your own private space anymore. You really don't want to find out for yourself I can promise you
