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  • EADD Moderators: Pissed_and_messed | Shinji Ikari

Gibberings CLXXIX - No not Mormons... morons...

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Cheers <3

Had a rough day yesterday, not only did i have a hangover, i found out that most of the blokes (all more than likely) know about my problems... Not an ideal label when you're self employed and its a fairly small circuit you're on. Those worries spilled over into today and was used as the justification..

Its probably being fairly clear ive taken drugs at work for them as ive turned up in some states when i split with my partner but they had it confirmed and what substance by a gossip from outside... just hope it doesnt effect my finding work.. even cleaning up, mud sticks an all that..

Ffs I need to get a diary and start writing in there and not on here..

Awh that must be so humiliating for you. I'm sorry to hear that. Do you know who has told them????

Evey
 
Cheers King.. it does help letting it out as i havent many places to vent. Just don't like sounding like a whiney bitch.

think of the good things in life :) when are you seeing your kids? you always seem happiest with them

This ^^ made me cry..! Tomorrow afternoon, and yes it is :)
 
Tomorrow afternoon, and yes it is :)

then concentrate on that and work to making that full time.
if you are happy and content, truly so, not with a hood of addiction over your eyes, you ll feel better and free. and all the shit about your past or drug problems will not matter as much and this will be visible to others too. just my 2c.

im off to bed to try to sleep.
hope you guys are having a fun nght for me ;)
 
You don't sound like a whiney bitch, it's not as if you are moaning about dropping your last chocolate hobnob on the floor is it?

You've identified your short comings and that means you are a fair way to overcoming your problems already. Keep going, you will get there eventually.
 
Night Kingme :)

Cheers Ponch :)

Evey, yes i do know who told them, it really doesn't matter though.

Ahhhhh FUCK... dropped my last fuckin hobnob on the cunting floor... my life FUCKIN SUCKS....!!! Shit cunt bollocks take pity on me ;)
 
Night Kingme :)

Cheers Ponch :)

Evey, yes i do know who told them, it really doesn't matter though.

Ahhhhh FUCK... dropped my last fuckin hobnob on the cunting floor... my life FUCKIN SUCKS....!!! Shit cunt bollocks take pity on me ;)

Whoever did that to you is a backstabbing c***. Life's full of them, I'm afraid. DTA - don't trust anyone!

LOL Ponch!

Evey
 
They've done me no favours, no.. nowt i can do about it now.

Trust nobody, where would that leave me..?? You have to have trust and faith in people..

Some will let you down, others wont, thats life. You just try to be one of the faithful ones.
 
Its 22:36 not 3 am lol

Night, Scotchy <3

I may come and visit you in a dream sometime. Would you like that? Apparently you can stalk people in their dreams :D hehehe

Edit: Bluelight is addictive. So as soon as I open my eyes i automatically pick my phone n start posting. Doesn't everyone? ;)

Evey
 
Feeling proper down Bluelight crew... This might not be the best place to talk about it I dunno, I know there's people on here who go through stuff daily though so will at least understand. Been unemployed for time now, not too unusual really but means that current income = £0 and living where I do atm (just outside several towns and cities but not close enough that they're accessible without a lot of money) is fuckall to do with those kind of financial statistics. Most of my mates have been smart enough to move to London proper when they got the opportunity, genuinely happy for them but means can barely see them nowadays and get so lonely. Girlfriend's in London as well, can usually scrape together the money to get to see her but as much as I love seeing her that means that I don't get to see my friends either if I spend my money on her, ideal world would be able to see both on my trips to the city but due to lifestyle differences the reality is a bit different...

Obvious solution is just get a fucking job but even the lowest level ones round here don't seem too bothered about taking more staff on atm and the high ones absolutely forget it. Need to keep at it, but am shitting myself about my debt - when I was studying my bank did a "student overdraft" where you could go into the overdraft without being charged during your study, which my stupidly naive younger self thought was fantastic, not giving a thought to the fact that now that I'm no longer a student I need to pay the shit back ASAP without wounding overdraft charges fucking me over and over... If I don't find an income source soon am absolutely fucked manz....

Soz just read this back and it sounds well moany, obv I have plenty of things to be grateful for in my life and my goals aren't unattainable, just feeling very hopeless and down atm... Cheap booze and jumping right back on the benzo wagon helping temporarily but not gonna be happy with myself tomoz... Blehh. Am probs gonna regret posting this tomoz but don't think I've admitted these worries to anyone in my life atm and does feel good to get them out, albeit in rambling and self pitying form lol. Hope everyone's well on here, haven't posted on this bit of Bluelight for a while and I know there's bare people on here with issues just as bad or worse, hope everyone's doing well fighting their personal battles. Positivity found lots of wicked music recently so should keep me occupied for a while :) love from south east UK x

EDIT: Little while to reflect and sack the fuck up and am feeling a bit better so apologies for bringing down the thread mood, did feel good to get it out though. Hope people are good :)
 
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StreetHalo: Am typing this on phone so can't give the full reply I'd like to but just wanted to say Ive been there and I know how shit it feels.

It all worked out for me though, just persevere mate get your foot in the door anywhere and jobs will lead on from one another. If I was back in the situation I was ten yearsxago I would be taking on that fucking pest controller job I saw in the job centre rather.than be unemployed know what I mean?

Also in the mean time have you thought about starting a business using any skill or knowledge you might have? I wish aI had done back then.

All the best anyway. Writing this half asleep so hope it makes sense. :)
 
Wicked night.. lift home from a friend who was passing through, not long got home, stomach is feeling a bit dodgy.. feeling a bit munted probably shoulda gone to bed instead of doing a lil bomb of phet. ahh well fuck it haha
 
streethalo man hang in there. try and try agin is the name of the game for the unemployed saldy... but please dont resort to drugs too often to handle the frustratiins or it will come back to bite yo ass.
cosmic give some solid avice there..

dan are you panning to go on till tomorrow? nothing like amps to jump start the weekend
 
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