Friends drifting away to be with girls... What would you do?

[Firth]

I'm a quiet person, what few close friends I do have I seen frequently and enjoyed being with, known them for years, had some ups and downs but friendship always tended to stay strong, I'm not an extremely outgoing person so I sometimes find it hard to meet new people, but it seems that people are interested in going into relationships and all of a sudden they don't seem interested in talking to you or being with you, try to make conversation only to get short half-arsed replies, as if they are trying to kill off the conversation. Right now I'm just lonely and have nothing to do. If their relationships were to go to shit and I was no longer there for them, it would destroy them.

What would you do? Stay quiet? Wait for them to talk? Say something? I find it hard to without sounding angry. Do something?

 

[Bearlove]

With the ones who are not starting relationships try and get out and about and meet new people. If your quiet then this is probably an easier way for you to meet new people and sow the seeds for future friendships. There's really nothing you can say to people who are moving into a relationship without it sounding a bit clingy or even mean (I've known you longer, what about me etc). You could always just speak to them ask them if they fancy doing x at the weekend if they are busy ask them to suggest another time, include their new partner (Do you and x fancy going for a meal, going to a movie, going for a walk etc). Depending on how good a friend they are they may really like the idea that they can be your friend and still have a relationship.

Why not ask your friends who are with their new partners to maybe try and hook you up with a person so the four of you can go out? May sound a bit desperate but would you rather sit alone or be a bit uncomfortable around new people? What hobbies or interests do you have? Can you not see if there is a club or meeting in your area where you could mingle with people, even if you take along one of your friends for support?

 

[thujone]

ime friends like that will drift away sooner or later anyway. maybe this is a good time to focus on your own goals in life and find some friends who have the same pursuits. they can help you grow as a person, unlike friends of convenience who are just an alternative to abject boredom