kicsicsillag
Greenlighter
so I`m pretty new to here, and couldn`t find a topic around this theme, so I will start a thread and I hope we will have some good conversation 
I started writing this a couple of days ago, but the whole thing went missing when I was about to post... so I try again (copy+paste rulz..%))
so I`m in this situation and even though I have some experience.. I`m having bit of a hard time to understand this guy... so guys... or girls knowing guys like this one.. please help me
ok here is the story.. so I started to go to this yoga class a year ago, and there is a group of friends and now we hang out a lot. there is a guy who is really hot and I instantly had a crush on him (as many other girls at the class - I see it...). he is pretty withdrawn and not really chatting with anyone before class, however when we hang out as a group, he is pretty friendly with everyone, but not the center of the whole thing.
1) in Sept, some of us went out for a drink (including a girl called J - a note for later), and I think I started it.. our legs touched by accident under the table.. I slightly touched his arm... you know the drill... as we walked out from the place, he walked next to me and our shoulders (or so.. he is taller than me..) touched and we started to push against the other.. looked at each other and he whispered `wanna come up`?.. of course I really wanted, so we ended up at his place. it was good, as I didn`t want any (emotional) involvement, but actually didn`t mind to have a friend with benefits so we were totally cool after (however I noticed that we are always next to each other although it is a huge class, like 50-60 peops)..
2) a few weeks later in Oct I invited him for drinks (this pattern will come up often between us.. having drinks usually has a second meaning now), and he told me that he doesn`t want to make it a thing.. and that we totally shouldn`t do it. at the end we landed horizontal..
a few months passed by between Oct and Feb.. I thought he was actually having something going on with J (girl noted before). she threw a Xmas party and the two exchanged looks and hang out, he helped her etc.. I gathered that they spend some time together... once the four of us (this guy, the girl: J, another guy and me) even grabbed dinner together.. it was a bit strange first, but I didn`t mind overall (other than losing some fun time..).
3) fastforward to Feb (4 months later).. he`s been travelling (we texted here and there) and he texted me after yoga (he know the schedule) if I want to grab a drink with him, he would meet me at the entrance.. I was curious, so I said OK. so I asked about J casually and he said they never dated. she hoped that every meetup is a date and he kept telling her he doesn`t want to date her, but want to meet as a friend, but she didn`t listen. she was pretty much all over him (as I saw previously). he was trying every trick and even told him she thinks he secretly likes her a lot.. too funny.
anyway.. we had a drink and as he sat next to me at the bar, and we laughed and chatted, I started losing my cool and I wanted to kiss him really bad... and he kissed back. and even though I did try to resist (when I got the text at least), we had a mindblowing time that evening (yes, we went to his place).. as I said goodbye, he said to keep it casual because he doesn`t want anyone to get hurt and it is more fun not to know if /when we have a fling again..
4) In March I texted him to celebrate something with me. he couldn`t do that day, but followed up next day, inviting me happy hour with his friends. I joined them, but after a while some people left and three of us ended up having dinner somewhere. after that we just went to the same direction and when the friend didn`t see us, we held hands, and walked toward to his house... stopped several times to kiss passionately and we couldn`t wait to get home.. I remember that night he was super gentle and I thought it was much different than the other occasions.. he was cuddling me after and caressed my skin as we were resting..
he mentioned every time I went over that I can stay overnight, but I didn`t want to..
I told him I would like to hang out with him as friends too sometimes, do stuff.. and so we were hanging out a couple of days later (nothing happened, not even a kiss)
in the meantimes between all these meetings.. he always stayed next to me at the yoga..
5) 3 weeks later (it is becoming more frequent...) on a Friday he texted me after he was back from travel and we went to a bar near my house. we were just chatting, no kissing or anything and when we were about to leave.. when he said he would like me to come over.. so I told him to come with me to my place. he came and he stayed through the night.. he caressed me for a really long time before we fell asleep and he was spooning me, hugging me and put his face in my hair when we fell asleep... in the morning he woke me up again caressing and he left (we met again in an hour at the class.. he was next to me and all glowing)..
that Saturday we wanted to see a concert but at the end it didn`t happen and we were texting so next day I asked him if he wanted to grab Easter dinner with me. I was planning to go to my fav restaurant. first he said he needs to get up super early (works very early hours), however when I wrote back `OK` and didn`t try to convince him further... he replied 2 minutes later that he is coming. so far we were pretty cool when others were around, they didn`t suspect anything between us.. but that night something was off. as he sat there in front of me, he seemed to be so happy and glowing and just.. just you could tell... I tried to be pretty cool because I know the whole restaurant and didn`t want people to have second thoughts but I think he gave us away. and we didn`t even touch or kiss.
when we said goodbye, he hugged me tight and he said maybe we could meet before he leaves again for a trip that week (lotsa trips). I was like better be now.. but OK. I could have used some cuddling and mooooore, but I thought it is better to pull the brakes, so we went home (separately).
next day, he came next to me at yoga. in fact, there was no space next to me and he waited until I moved a bit over so that he can come near.
a day later we had our yoga class with our friends.. again, came next to me (again there are 50-60 yogis there so lotsa space!!) anyway. he was chatty and glowing and after the class we stayed (he is really good so he wanted to help with some things) so we sat there until everyone walked out (J walked by, stopped and commented something on my top and left - all with a smile, but I know she knows now). a friend texted me later that `what`s going on?! this guy was all over you..!!!` haha. yeah I thought we were cool. as we walked out, he asked me if I wanted to join him to a concert/gbye party the next day. I was like why not (mistake!).
comes next day, we text and I realize the party is like 30 min away by car (no public transportation and I just sold my car as not needed in the city..) so he tried to find a spot for me with his friends. the concert was abt to start at 7pm, and at 5 I was nervous (I didn`t care abt the concert, more like I wanted to see him really bad) but I kept my cool and didn`t text him yet. at 5pm he wrote he couldn`t fix a seat for me but if I can get there somehow, he would like me to join. I was like `naah, I skip this one. have a higher bid for tonight` (=yoga). he wrote OK.
we haven`t talked yet since.. he is travelling so I want to have some things sorted out by the time he is back...
any thoughts? xx
ps. what do you consider a friend with benefits - what rules do you keep?
I started writing this a couple of days ago, but the whole thing went missing when I was about to post... so I try again (copy+paste rulz..%))
so I`m in this situation and even though I have some experience.. I`m having bit of a hard time to understand this guy... so guys... or girls knowing guys like this one.. please help me
ok here is the story.. so I started to go to this yoga class a year ago, and there is a group of friends and now we hang out a lot. there is a guy who is really hot and I instantly had a crush on him (as many other girls at the class - I see it...). he is pretty withdrawn and not really chatting with anyone before class, however when we hang out as a group, he is pretty friendly with everyone, but not the center of the whole thing.
1) in Sept, some of us went out for a drink (including a girl called J - a note for later), and I think I started it.. our legs touched by accident under the table.. I slightly touched his arm... you know the drill... as we walked out from the place, he walked next to me and our shoulders (or so.. he is taller than me..) touched and we started to push against the other.. looked at each other and he whispered `wanna come up`?.. of course I really wanted, so we ended up at his place. it was good, as I didn`t want any (emotional) involvement, but actually didn`t mind to have a friend with benefits
so we were totally cool after (however I noticed that we are always next to each other although it is a huge class, like 50-60 peops).. 2) a few weeks later in Oct I invited him for drinks (this pattern will come up often between us.. having drinks usually has a second meaning now), and he told me that he doesn`t want to make it a thing.. and that we totally shouldn`t do it. at the end we landed horizontal..
a few months passed by between Oct and Feb.. I thought he was actually having something going on with J (girl noted before). she threw a Xmas party and the two exchanged looks and hang out, he helped her etc.. I gathered that they spend some time together... once the four of us (this guy, the girl: J, another guy and me) even grabbed dinner together.. it was a bit strange first, but I didn`t mind overall (other than losing some fun time..).
3) fastforward to Feb (4 months later).. he`s been travelling (we texted here and there) and he texted me after yoga (he know the schedule) if I want to grab a drink with him, he would meet me at the entrance.. I was curious, so I said OK. so I asked about J casually and he said they never dated. she hoped that every meetup is a date and he kept telling her he doesn`t want to date her, but want to meet as a friend, but she didn`t listen. she was pretty much all over him (as I saw previously). he was trying every trick and even told him she thinks he secretly likes her a lot.. too funny.
anyway.. we had a drink and as he sat next to me at the bar, and we laughed and chatted, I started losing my cool and I wanted to kiss him really bad... and he kissed back. and even though I did try to resist (when I got the text at least), we had a mindblowing time that evening (yes, we went to his place).. as I said goodbye, he said to keep it casual because he doesn`t want anyone to get hurt and it is more fun not to know if /when we have a fling again..
4) In March I texted him to celebrate something with me. he couldn`t do that day, but followed up next day, inviting me happy hour with his friends. I joined them, but after a while some people left and three of us ended up having dinner somewhere. after that we just went to the same direction and when the friend didn`t see us, we held hands, and walked toward to his house... stopped several times to kiss passionately and we couldn`t wait to get home.. I remember that night he was super gentle and I thought it was much different than the other occasions.. he was cuddling me after and caressed my skin as we were resting..
he mentioned every time I went over that I can stay overnight, but I didn`t want to..
I told him I would like to hang out with him as friends too sometimes, do stuff.. and so we were hanging out a couple of days later (nothing happened, not even a kiss)
in the meantimes between all these meetings.. he always stayed next to me at the yoga..
5) 3 weeks later (it is becoming more frequent...) on a Friday he texted me after he was back from travel and we went to a bar near my house. we were just chatting, no kissing or anything and when we were about to leave.. when he said he would like me to come over.. so I told him to come with me to my place. he came and he stayed through the night.. he caressed me for a really long time before we fell asleep and he was spooning me, hugging me and put his face in my hair when we fell asleep... in the morning he woke me up again caressing and he left (we met again in an hour at the class.. he was next to me and all glowing)..
that Saturday we wanted to see a concert but at the end it didn`t happen and we were texting so next day I asked him if he wanted to grab Easter dinner with me. I was planning to go to my fav restaurant. first he said he needs to get up super early (works very early hours), however when I wrote back `OK` and didn`t try to convince him further... he replied 2 minutes later that he is coming. so far we were pretty cool when others were around, they didn`t suspect anything between us.. but that night something was off. as he sat there in front of me, he seemed to be so happy and glowing and just.. just you could tell... I tried to be pretty cool because I know the whole restaurant and didn`t want people to have second thoughts but I think he gave us away. and we didn`t even touch or kiss.
when we said goodbye, he hugged me tight and he said maybe we could meet before he leaves again for a trip that week (lotsa trips). I was like better be now.. but OK. I could have used some cuddling and mooooore, but I thought it is better to pull the brakes, so we went home (separately).
next day, he came next to me at yoga. in fact, there was no space next to me and he waited until I moved a bit over so that he can come near.
a day later we had our yoga class with our friends.. again, came next to me (again there are 50-60 yogis there so lotsa space!!) anyway. he was chatty and glowing and after the class we stayed (he is really good so he wanted to help with some things) so we sat there until everyone walked out (J walked by, stopped and commented something on my top and left - all with a smile, but I know she knows now). a friend texted me later that `what`s going on?! this guy was all over you..!!!` haha. yeah I thought we were cool. as we walked out, he asked me if I wanted to join him to a concert/gbye party the next day. I was like why not (mistake!).
comes next day, we text and I realize the party is like 30 min away by car (no public transportation and I just sold my car as not needed in the city..) so he tried to find a spot for me with his friends. the concert was abt to start at 7pm, and at 5 I was nervous (I didn`t care abt the concert, more like I wanted to see him really bad) but I kept my cool and didn`t text him yet. at 5pm he wrote he couldn`t fix a seat for me but if I can get there somehow, he would like me to join. I was like `naah, I skip this one. have a higher bid for tonight` (=yoga). he wrote OK.
we haven`t talked yet since.. he is travelling so I want to have some things sorted out by the time he is back...
any thoughts? xx
ps. what do you consider a friend with benefits - what rules do you keep?
