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Four months and my ex- girlfriend wants to meet with me.

I would give her another chance Mr. OP, but I wouldn't get emotionally caught up or attached to her yet. If she can prove something to you over time, then maybe so.

I have a rare ability not to get oneitis with a woman, and you know what's funny. Ever since I aquired the mindset, women are even more attracted to me because I display a coolness of not being needy and allowing them to have a lot of space & freedom. They since a lot of confidence in me.

I could have talked about this more in my "Pick-Up Artist" thread, but way too many people get offended by Pick-Up Artist philosophy here. I had to disband the forum of PUA. I don't think the bluelight is ready for it just yet. It's way ahead of it's time. I do think women & men could learn a lot from it.
 
I wouldn't give her a second chance. I always said no turning back when things like this happens in a relationship. See I was fine when we broke up until she contacted me twice over 4 months time. Now I'm writing these damn post, this is BS hahha. I'm just not sure if I'm going to gain anything by meeting her. I don't want her anymore. She clearly is in love with me. I this she should respect that. But then guilt comes into play, how do I go about the gifts.

Teabag Johnny said:
I would give her another chance Mr. OP, but I wouldn't get emotionally caught up or attached to her yet. If she can prove something to you over time, then maybe so.

I have a rare ability not to get oneitis with a woman, and you know what's funny. Ever since I aquired the mindset, women are even more attracted to me because I display a coolness of not being needy and allowing them to have a lot of space & freedom. They since a lot of confidence in me.

I could have talked about this more in my "Pick-Up Artist" thread, but way too many people get offended by Pick-Up Artist philosophy here. I had to disband the forum of PUA. I don't think the bluelight is ready for it just yet. It's way ahead of it's time. I do think women & men could learn a lot from it.
Click to expand...
 
Just tell her how you feel, but be sure to acknowledge & thank her for the gifts. Tell her all the good things you like about her.

BUT, tell her your situation & your just ready to move on (be nice about it).

Be a gentleman & go out on top :)
 
^ agreed.

it sounds as though you have healed and gotten closure since breaking up with her. why open old wounds unnecessarily if you truly believe there is nothing to be gained/of benefit to you emotionally from the experience?

as for the gifts, its entirely up to you if you choose to politely say thankyou, and return them; or if you choose to keep them and move on. personally i wouldnt want to keep them, as moving forward includes removing material objects and things that remind you of your ex from your life and may potentially stunt that if left lingering around.

good luck op <3

...kytnism...:|
 
I should mentioned that I had met a girl directly after I broke up with my ex and before I left for my trip. We met on Easter Sunday and went out three times. I slept with her the 2nd date and everything was great. The day I slept with the girl I met was the day I officially broke up with my ex in person. This was all happening after I called it off with my ex. After my trip I tried to contact the girl back a couple of times but received no response. I guess this is my guilt, however I still feel I've done nothing wrong if we broke up.

P.S. Email pending to ex-girlfriend about meeting up.
 
So I haven't sent the email yet cause I've been in and out of the office. But it's funny because my sister asked if she contacted me today. She thinks I should meet with her after the card she send, letter and gift card. I personally think some of those material things wouldn't make my decision for going out. However, she said I should be considerate and I she knows I'm not a cold person to just cut someone off that harsh. I had to remind my sister of what happened a bit. She still thought I should meet. Yeah I'm still a bit undecided.
 
Ok so I decided to email her and tell her I wasn't going to meet. Here was the email...

Ex,


Thank you for the birthday wishes and gift, I really appreciate it. I received the letters you wrote as well. I can be honest and say that some of the things written I can relate with. But to speak of them will just bring poignant moments. I really think it’s best that we don’t meet. I don’t want you to unconsciously or consciously hold on any longer. I hope your well and wish you the best.

Sincerely,

-Me

I think I handled this well without being a jerk. Sighhhh!!! relief.
 
Received an lengthy email from her back this morning. She said she understands and respects my decision and that rejection is just a protection and redirection. She wanted to tell me about how she's been working to change herself. She spoke about her therapy sessions and how beneficial they are. I think she wanted to appeal her case and try reconciliation. She mentioned that she kept reliving the experience when I broke up with her in May. It was a bad time and she said she felt so little, hopeless and fearful. She also went on to say that she's not trying to blame her circumstances, and that she takes full responsibility for the choices she made. I hope I made the right decision by not meeting.
 
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What's done is done - you've made the decision, seem relieved by it - now you can let go.
(ie don't let this series of events manipulate you emotionally - you seemed to be quite aware of this being a possibility in your initial posts - you've made your decision, so it's best to just go with that IMO).
 
Thanks for everyone chiming in and helping out. One last thing... She got me a gift card that I could use to buy a couple tires for my bike. Should I use this card or chuck it. She said not to return the card. Not sure what to do about this. Initially I wasn't going to use it but I blue a tire yesterday lol.
 
Just use it.
No need to get hung up about it - it was given to you; it's yours. Don't worry about where it came from - to do that would be carrying guilt about what happened. I think it's generally petty to return gifts.
Consider it the final act of this drama.
 
Lol, this is exactly the confirmation I needed haha. Thanks dude.

spacejunk said:
Just use it.
No need to get hung up about it - it was given to you; it's yours. Don't worry about where it came from - to do that would be carrying guilt about what happened. I think it's generally petty to return gifts.
Consider it the final act of this drama.
Click to expand...
 
Decided not to use it. I'm not sure if this is normal or not but because she came back into my life after breaking up I've been thinking about her ever since. I told her I don't want to meet with her but feeling like I should reach out and reconsider. Idk maybe I'm a bit emotional right now... Help! Would like to hear different perspectives on this from male and female.
 
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