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For those who have cheated - Why did you?

I never said it was ok that I did it. Those were just my reasons.

Maybe it was that I was never with the right person, but I've always craved more than I was getting from my SO. If it was lust, I wanted love (and vice-versa), if it was vanilla, I wanted kinky (and also vice-versa). I went other places to find these things because few of my partners have been communicative when it comes to sex, and trying to explain what I wanted usually ended up with someone feeling like they were doing something wrong.

Cheating became the easiest solution.
 
My bf didn't see eye to eye on what was cheating because we never talked about it. He saw it as cheating and I didn't understand. It was emotional cheating. I understand now. If you feel bad about it, you likely shouldn't be doing it. He had just left to go overseas I was confused and it was a guy that I had dated. Thats the most recent incident, as for the rest...immaturity and desire for attention plain and simple.
 
Pillthrill said:
My bf didn't see eye to eye on what was cheating because we never talked about it. He saw it as cheating and I didn't understand. It was emotional cheating. I understand now. If you feel bad about it, you likely shouldn't be doing it. He had just left to go overseas I was confused and it was a guy that I had dated. Thats the most recent incident, as for the rest...immaturity and desire for attention plain and simple.
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sounds like you and your bf had a very long talk and he made you understand lol
 
trancegirle said:
It kinda of worries me out how many people have cheated:\

I dont mean to sound judgmental tho! :) im well aware cheating happens under many different circumstances.. Each to their own..

But i just know i could never cheat.. Everyone say's given the opportunity you would & i actually have had a few opportunities, the thought made me sick..
Its just if i like someone, yet alone love them i honestly do not become attracted to anyone else.. im also a terrible lier so id have to blurt it out IF i ever did..

I hate knowing that i could one day be cheated on. And even worse never know about it.. I dont think there would be a worse feeling in the world:(

*slowly backs away from thread im not meant to be in*:o
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haha :) same with me.
i havent cheated but i suspect i have been cheated on.
im only verrrrry young, but my current relationship (1.5yrs) is probably that of a 30yr, married couple.
i cant imagine what it would feel like.. and wouldnt really want to.
if i found out tomorrow that he has ever cheated on me i would break up with him there and then..
just because of all the effort ive put (as well as him) into the relationship. i couldnt go on knowing that he betrayed me
 
maybe a little off topic but it might be useful..
me and my boyfriend have a policy that.. it is cheating if you wouldnt want the other half to know about it.
that might even mean a naughty txt..
 
saveyour said:
sounds like you and your bf had a very long talk and he made you understand lol
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Actually it was a talk that was needed long before all this happened. I'm glad we talked, and without an arguement, almost a miracle somedays.
 
In my first relationship, with a guy, I cheated on him because he was completely neglectful emotionally and physically. He wanted to spend all his time hunting virtual bugs and goblins in everquest and chatting on yahoo. After about 6 months I hooked up with a girl for just a casual sexual encounter. He never found out.

A few months later he got a super cheesy love letter from some girl in some state that was pretty much obviously a teenager based on the things she said and her writing style, I also found child porn (like infants and toddlers being molested by what i can only assume to be uncles and fathers) on his computer.

I didn't really care that he "cheated" on me because the "relationship" wasn't really a relationship anymore, it was just a shitty roommate situation.

I decided to pack up and move on after wasting about a year of time anmd spending a lot of my money supporting his jobless ass (feeling obligated because he had supported me for a few months when I first moved in with him)

That was when I was like 20-21

Then I was happily single for a while

In my current relationship (with another woman), which I've been in since i was about 23. I kinda sorta cheated on her, we're both bisexual and enjoy sex with guys so we sort of have an arrangement where if one of us wants to hook up with a guy for some fun it's OK. We also will occasionally invite a guy over and have three way fun so it's a fairly open relationship.

Anyways, last year we had both started fooling around with one of our mutual guy friends from time to time (seperately) and rather then go with the flow and enjoy the occasional extra-curricular benefits of the friendship he decided that he wanted to be in a relationship with me and started trying to wedge me and my girlfriend apart.

I love my girlfriend and our relationship was very strong but for whatever reason I started to get very into this guy after we had fooled around a lot, he wanted to take me on dates and buy me stuff and I enjoyed the attention. I don't think I was falling in love with him per-se but I was having a lot of fun and think I had a little crush, but he seemed to be on his way to falling in love with me.

The more he tried to come between me and my girlfriend the more pissed she got at him and at me for not nipping it in the bud and the more drama it caused between me and her and the more it made me consider that maybe I'd rather be with him.

Eventually I just stopped seeing him after a big blow up between her and him and her giving me a big talking to and me realizing that it was stupid of me to consider leaving fantastic long term relationship to pursue something that in the back of my head I knew was just an infatuation.
 
^ being bi is tough sometimes. In the past the urge to cheat came from just wanting to kiss a girl for a change. Now, yeah it would be nice but I don't need that sort of thing. I know that I don't want relationships with women, they are evil and scare me, no offense and I love my bf.

I think the mistake before, maybe also I just wasn't ready for a relationship, especially with someone that would be gone all the time and he forced the issue...who knows
Can your ever really repair a relationship damaged from cheating? I feel like I'm trying to make up for a mistake that I can't live down that happened just days into the relationship, since then my ever move and motivation has been in question.
 
young...curious about other people...didn't truly love my bf

I guess I thought that it would hurt him if he found out...but he never did. It's kinda crappy...but a lot of crappy things happen in unsuccessful relationships.

I'm mad about my current man. The thought never even crosses my mind to be with someone else. I doubt anyone could even fill his shoes
 
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