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✍️ WORDS ✍️
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Words Moderators: Shambles
For Richard
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jameslovesyou
Bluelighter
nice... me gusta
onetwothreefour
Bluelight Crew
more? haikus are sweet, but i always want a bit more. raw turbulence is good though. and so's "dream-project of our eyes".
dunno about the rhyming.
dunno about the rhyming.
exoiced
Bluelighter
I find it to be sharp and neat and I like that, the word use within the few lines is tasty.
This ending:
so clear and the 'everyone rise' just slides in like a knife.
This ending:
so clear and the 'everyone rise' just slides in like a knife.
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hahaha I love it. I really do. it's like a rouch pencil sketch of a beautiful painting, which I consider to be almost better than the painting itself. I really like the choice of words. Maybe it came to you quick but those couple sentences seem like they may have taken a while to write.
Thanks guys. 
I wouldn't call this a haiku as such, although I guess that depends on your definition. The last line / rhyme is a homage to Clark Coolidge and his poem Noon Point.
This is how it came to me, although I later tried to fiddle around with the first line, which I'm still not 100% happy with. I'm aiming to use "filthy" in the sense of "filthy rich", although I'm not sure it comes across that way?
onetwothreefour said:
I wouldn't call this a haiku as such, although I guess that depends on your definition. The last line / rhyme is a homage to Clark Coolidge and his poem Noon Point.
emesaeler said:
This is how it came to me, although I later tried to fiddle around with the first line, which I'm still not 100% happy with. I'm aiming to use "filthy" in the sense of "filthy rich", although I'm not sure it comes across that way?
EntrenchdMentalist
Bluelighter
- Joined
- Jun 3, 2006
- Messages
- 106
:D
Thank you!!
Oh man, I feel love, which I'm in need of (aren't we all) and damned if not some inspiration as well. Words are like ghosts to me at the moment, all wispy and half-seen. I have written maybe two pieces since I started my latest job and neither of them up to scratch. My visits here have dwindled, too. I came tonight out of desperation and found this! Joy! I did have an idea just the other day but had no pen and now it's gone
Though my music has been taking up some time a bit lately so maybe I have to get used to life on a creative pendulum.
I need to move the fuck out of suburbia post-haste. It's my only hope. I need the acid rain conciousness of the city in my face if I'm to survive.
Thanks, Stu. Big love xoxox
Thank you!!
Oh man, I feel love, which I'm in need of (aren't we all) and damned if not some inspiration as well. Words are like ghosts to me at the moment, all wispy and half-seen. I have written maybe two pieces since I started my latest job and neither of them up to scratch. My visits here have dwindled, too. I came tonight out of desperation and found this! Joy! I did have an idea just the other day but had no pen and now it's gone
Though my music has been taking up some time a bit lately so maybe I have to get used to life on a creative pendulum.
I need to move the fuck out of suburbia post-haste. It's my only hope. I need the acid rain conciousness of the city in my face if I'm to survive.
Thanks, Stu. Big love xoxox
There's plenty of love going around in Words atm...
Come to think of it, I don't think I wrote anything of note when I was living in Glen Waverley.
Is any of your latest music online? I'd be keen to have a listen.
Come to think of it, I don't think I wrote anything of note when I was living in Glen Waverley.
Is any of your latest music online? I'd be keen to have a listen.
EntrenchdMentalist
Bluelighter
- Joined
- Jun 3, 2006
- Messages
- 106
Not yet. I've just bought a TB-303 (!!!) and am waiting to pick it up and then I will start on a new slew of electro acid stuff which will hopefully be online soon after. Gimme a few months