sadmachine
Bluelighter
Many years ago a friend would often offer me a few puffs on the pipe (meth) then a couple hours later I'd go and get on properly. I'd get nowhere near the same euphoria/pleasure from that bag as I would if I didn't have those few tiny puffs.
Same with coke, if the first few lines aren't big enough I will never reach it, even if I redose super high or frequent, just more side effects. And that's with 0 tolerance, less than 5-6 total experiences with it.
Noticing the same now with dexamphetamine, 20mg+15mg+10mg spread out is delightful, fulfilling and satisfying. 10mg+20mg+25mg is disappointing, unsatisfying and moody despite being a higher total intake.
It seems with me that it doesn't matter the stim or the quality, if that first dose isn't large enough then the experience is doomed to be unfulfilling every time. It's a really, really dramatic difference to me, like two completely different experiences. One is at least satisfying and fulfilling, the other is intensely unfulfilling and disappointing.
Does everyone else experience this too? To such extremes? Perhaps just my own brain chemistry?
Same with coke, if the first few lines aren't big enough I will never reach it, even if I redose super high or frequent, just more side effects. And that's with 0 tolerance, less than 5-6 total experiences with it.
Noticing the same now with dexamphetamine, 20mg+15mg+10mg spread out is delightful, fulfilling and satisfying. 10mg+20mg+25mg is disappointing, unsatisfying and moody despite being a higher total intake.
It seems with me that it doesn't matter the stim or the quality, if that first dose isn't large enough then the experience is doomed to be unfulfilling every time. It's a really, really dramatic difference to me, like two completely different experiences. One is at least satisfying and fulfilling, the other is intensely unfulfilling and disappointing.
Does everyone else experience this too? To such extremes? Perhaps just my own brain chemistry?
