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Detox Finally stopped the methadone clinic

You are more then entitled to whine a little or a alot. I'll tell you my methadone withdrawal story. I was on 150mg for 2 years. My life started to fall apart again and my family pretty much forced me off. So i tapered from 150 to 50mg over the course of like 45 days. Then shit really hit the fan and I went to rehab. They cut me off straight away no more taper. So the first 72 hours are fine slept ate all good. So like the fourth day starts and all hell begins. By 8pm I'm in worse withdrawal then I thought was possible. It wasn't my first kick you know? But this panic just came over me like I had never felt in my life. I couldn't sit still I was raging with energy but i couldn't contain it. My arms felt like jello in the worst way imaginable I couldn't stop trying to stretch. It was bad.

So I go down to the nurse and im like I'm fucking dying I'm ready to start Suboxone. They offered everyone a quick sub taper but methadone has such a long half-life I had to wait for full withdrawal. So I thought I was there like "it so couldn't get worse then this!. About five minutes after I put that shit under my tongue I felt this shiver I can't describe it like every muscle in my body contorted at the same time. My eyes started watering like a fountain. I was shaking. I go back to the nurse flipping out making a scene. They are all pissed off and telling me they can't do shit for me. I couldn't even sit still long enough for them to get my blood pressure. Like I had to be in constant motion. I can't even properly describe it now it just seems impossible to feel like that. So anyway me and the staff argue I'm coming apart at the fucking seams. Finally I'm like your going to help or I'm jumping off the goddamn roof.

So they called me an ambulance. Long story short after the longest ride of my life we get to the ER. They give me IV Ativan. Nothing no relief. Give me another dose 10 minutes later no relief. All this time I'm making a scene I can't fucking stay still so I'm trying to get up and pace but I'm supposed to be like in bed being observed because I threatened suicide. Just a shit show for everyone. So finally nurse comes back again she's like "your going to sleep". They knocked me out with IV versed. I wake up in the phych ward. They put me on Suboxone because the precipitated withdrawal had cleared the methadone and I felt better. Still on sub to this day. That was April of last year.

So yeah your doing pretty good I would say. Definitely handling it better then I did.

Lope will knock down the body symptoms which might help you sleep. A benzo would be great if available. Otherwise maybe have a drink? Unfortunately there is no sure fire solution.


Just figure out a way to get through the next 5 days. The acute withdrawal will start gradually easing up after that. Then you can worry about the rest of your life. It's important to manage your expectations too. Your brain isn't going to get back in balance for quite awhile. Read up on post acute withdrawal syndrome.

I hope your asleep right now. I'll check this again in the morning.
 
Debbie: Hang in there--like CJ said, you are on the downward side of this and it will start getting better soon. The good days will start to out number the bad ones.

Again, not sure if you are into natural remedies, but I mentioned a couple of options in a previous post in this thread. Honestly, I have never been a big believer in homeopathic meds, but the GABA + 5-HTP did help me sleep. Dr. Google says that scientifically they don't cross the blood/brain barrier and therefore don't do anything, but they did help me. Also, many people swear by Melatonin + Valerian root. My only advice would be to read up on the possible side effects because they can still cause weird symptoms and interactions, even if they are natural. My sleep doctor also suggested that I take a hot bath about an hour before bedtime, make sure the bedroom is cool and dark, and eliminate all computer/phone/tablet screens about 5 hours before bedtime. Apparently they emit a "blue light" wavelength that messes with natural sleep patterns.

I was at the same place you are during my last WD--the insomnia was absolutely maddening. Could not concentrate, reflexes were shot, balance seemed off, foggy thinking, etc. I would have killed for 5 hours of uninterrupted sleep.

You've shown incredible strength and will power. Just compare where you are now to where you were 10 days ago. The light at the end of the tunnel will continue to keep getting brighter. You have got this--try to focus and stay positive.
 
Also, regarding your employer--I would contact the National Labor Relations Board (NLRB) and either file a complaint or ask to talk to someone about the issue. Your state may also have its own Labor Board as well which may get you quicker answers. Normally, the Labor Board deals with union rights/issues but also gets involved in worker's rights and unfair employment practices. Technically, if your time-off was approved and you have PTO time earned, then you don't have to tell them shit about why you were off. I am not an employment attorney, but I have owned my own business for a long time and have dealt with a few employee issues over the years.
 
CJ. I can identify with that electric charge of energy. Yours sounded much more intensified like x10 but I had something similar. I really felt jacked up on something the other night. Could not be still, it was like that for a good 36 hrs. I have thought about a drink, unfortunately it makes me hyper. Maybe the sugar in alcohol, IDK, I always think of taking a shot of bourbon as inspiration. Ecspecially in the evening to do some kind of physical work. energy left yesterday and was replaced by a very tired, achy feel.
I ended up taking 8mg of Imodium to get through my shift. It did help and..............I SLEPT LAST NIGHT!!!!!!!! Probably a mixture of lope and a Xanax. I took .25 benzo plus melatonin at 12am and woke at 3am and repeated the dose. I slept until 8:30. 8 hrs!!!!!
 
Gollum, how are YOU?
i usually take 5mg of melatonin, the one I picked up also has chamomile and lavender. I will read up on the GABA. I have concerns on all the medications I’m taking for withdrawls. I realize the worst is over, so I’m wanting to get rid of all the pills. Last night I kept swallowing pills. My Dr put me on trazadone, clonidine, I take before bedtime. On top of that I took ibuprofen, Tylenol, for aches, then I took a Xanax so I could sleep with a back up of melatonin. Before I fell asleep I swear I think I could feel each chemical hit my body. I had very vivid dreams. Short clips.
 
Day 16
im on the mend. It’s better. Still ache, but maybe that’s just how I am.
Sleep is important, I hate having to take things to sleep.
Hate taking something for ache.
guess I COULD quit all that too........ I’d be a miserable soul though.
 
Day 17
slept well with lope and a Xanax. Felt good earlier. Worked. Left early, felt exhausted. Hoping energy level will increase. Hard going back to both jobs. 7 days a week.
Pain between shoulder blades in back pretty intense. Hoping it’s still lingering methadone withdrawl. I did not take clonidine this morning. I think it gives me a headache.
emotions are still pretty topsy turvy. Where is all that energy from the other day?
is this normal?
 
Day 18
im getting anxious ....... want all this to go away. Again I went to work and left early. Just totally exhausted. WTH? It’s like wading in deep water.
 
I know. It wears you down over time. But what choice is there but to continue on? Going back on methadone would make all this suffering be for nothing.

You've got probably another week of feeling really bad. If you have anymore Xanax knock yourself out tonight and try to recharge. You can also take a largish dose of loperamide 10-15mg to tone down the body symptoms.
 
Thank you CJ, I was beginning to think this was the way I am without anything, which would absolutely suck. Can’t tell you how much your advice means. I feel like going to that clinic and telling all about this site.
I would’ve never thought methadone would be this hard to come off. It’s crazy. They never mentioned this at the clinic. Even gave us a fact sheet on the myths of methadone. One I remember is that methadone doesn’t get in your bones. No, I’m sure it doesn’t actually, but damn if it doesn’t feel like it. Another was weight gain. Said you want to eat more now that you are healthier. True but, the lack of motivation makes you pretty freakin lazy. I can not believe I made such an inept decision, taking methadone.
I still have really bad back pain. The ache in knees is uncomfortable but manageable. Headache comes and goes. It’s not my usual headache, it’s a very weird headache. I’m sure brain chemistry is trying to stabilize from the lack of. But I wonder, why the fatigue? Has the body been shocked? I’ve tried internet and find nothing on it. ATM it’s my biggest gripe.
i take clonidine and trazadone at night, ibuprofen through the day. The Xanax has me worried cause I think on it a lot. I take sparingly, strategically so I can get 3 hrs sleep. .25, but most of the evening has me watching clock till midnight when I take it. I have very few left, can get some through a source but do not want to go that route.
Im not as foggy, I can think pretty clearly. Stomach seems much better. I can laugh.
I look forward to maybe an ache free day, maybe one with 6 hrs of solid sleep.
 
One last question CJ before the site goes down, does the lope make you groggy? Cause yep, I’ll be taking some tonight iF it doesn’t. I have taken so many comfort meds, body been changing so, I do not know what’s what.
Pill follow ur advice. Dose up on Lope, maybe take whole Xanax or two. Sleep the night. Damn that sounds pretty wonderful.
 
Feeling comfy is not a prerequisite for recovery...........read up on PAWS. Discouraging but at least I now know, this is going to take awhile.
 
Day 19
the never ending story, the aches, the runny nose, the headaches and fatigue.
working makes things normal, I have income, but it’s hard to work when you feel crappy. Days are long. Sleep,still hit and miss, 3 hrs at a time. Time drags. I feel almost defeated. I do not know how to make myself feel better. There WAS always something that could perk me up. something. Sobriety will be a new thing. Not that I ever went all out, but still in my own way I’ve relied on chemicals to alter my mood for a long, long time. I do miss the pick me up. I wish I did not. I do not know if I will feel good again. It’s better than 2 weeks ago, but it’s really frustrating.
Pros? I’m not going to a clinic. I do feel more present. I’m able to feel pain (is that a pro) I have laughed. It’s hard to enjoy people when you just wan to sleep, be a vegetable. I so hope that in another week, things will look just a bit better
 
Day 20
going to put my mind into eating better, try to get back into some kind of exercise routine. It goes against what my body feels. I’ve been on a low carb diet for two years (Mostly protein and veggies) and felt great eating the right foods. I would use carbs if I needed energy. Lack of appetite caused me to eat things that aren’t so good. I could not force an egg down, but a cookie.........
Its time. Time to put my head into my health.
i did get some much needed sleep last night. 6 whole hours. I used a heating pad on my legs to fall asleep. I also took a whole Xanax which I said I would not do. BUT, right now I just have what seems a really bad cold. Even with sleep lack of motivation makes me feel extremely lazy. I’ve got to get up and DO. Three weeks tomorrow.
 
Sorry it took a day to reply. I got busy in real life.

You should start feeling better in the next 4-5 days. By 30 days after your last dose things should be significantly better. Unfortunately post acute withdrawal syndrome is a very real thing. Read up on it's effects. Basically it's severe depression and a low level continuation of acute withdrawal.

As far as the Xanax. Take it if you need it. There will never be a time you need it more.

Your kicking ass! I am honestly really impressed with how you have handled this. I don't think I could have worked while withdrawing.
 
Thank you CJ, I work cause I got to live. I can honestly say I should not have been at work last week at all. My mind was all over the place. Kinda embarrassing how hard I laughed or how easy it was to get ticked off, flippin like a light switch. Hurting bad in joints, ache, but they would hurt at home too. The worst is the exhaustion, really pushing to DO anything. Luckily I work a govt job. Lol The other is a family business, hard physically, I have not done what I needed there.
i had to take loperamide today. I hate when ache makes you catch your breath.
It made things feel like normal. I took 8mg and 3 hrs later had no pain! Still good, I took it 12 hrs ago. Only thing is headache. I’m beginning to think it’s the clonidine, I didn’t take it for a night plus another day and headache was minimum.
Days 5 and 6........were probably the sickest I’ve ever been in my entire life. Waking on day 6 felt feverish, stomach was cramping, all over ache. The pain at night was horrible. I rode an exercise bike. I could sit, lay my head on handlebars pedal away. Ride for 10 min try to sleep, wake up 30 mins later go back to bike.
Guess im trying to remember where I was and where I am now.
Today was the best day I’ve has since I started all this. Rough morning but better evening.
Thank you for reading if you got this far, any comments or suggestions are always welcomed. Heck, if you have experienced anything I would like to know. Need to read more on PAWS.
 
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