CaptainBlue
Greenlighter
- Joined
- Jan 27, 2017
- Messages
- 4
Hello, I'm new and not sure where to post this. I'm sorry for posting in wrong section if this is the case and I originally put it in new members which I think was wrong. Well, with that said..lets get to it.
Let me begin with a little of my history. In regards to opiates; 4 years total with peak dosage of 330mg roxicodone daily. I have brought myself down over the last year to about 100mg and even further down to 30mg in recent months. I am on a taper program but had a "fuck it" moment which causes me to shoot back to 5x 30mg roxi (150mg) a day. This is the case up until last week in which I ran out and have none left. I turned to 30mg morphine er in which I used a scalpel to scrape the purple coating off before crushing and finally railing it(snorting). I have only ever snorted since first starting. I thought I was lucky and picked up some a 215 yesterday. Unfortunately I'm almost positive they are fake from my experience in taste, color recognition, brittleness when breaking, smell, and of course the feeling. The back of this pill protrudes double the ammount as the top half with the writing. Based on what I can see on the internet it most likely contains fentynyl if it's fake. Because I am withdrawing and also out of the morphine 30s, will very very small peices of the fake roxi help? I can usually snort 60mg at a time and be normal but a third of this fake a215 (10mg) causes a high. I'm really depressed and down. I'm lost in my own world with no friends anymore, torn relationship, no job, 8 years in college and still didn't graduate. What I'm asking here is a mixture of venting and help seeking all in one. I know my message isn't clear yet it feels like some sort of relief to be able to type to people that I'm sure have experienced similar issues. Suboxone makes me sick. The taste, just everything about it is terrible not to mention I don't want to have my name in any database. Though people claim it's confidential, having Physicians for cousins, uncles, etc. I know it's possible for records to be seen and that I cannot ever have. This suboxone clinic is out of the question. Withdrawing and tapering guides are around everywhere, I know. No where gives me info on using fentanyl to help with oxy withdrawl from what I see. I don't know what to do at all. I had a stomach issue last week where a biopsy was done. I can't take Percocet (I have 6x 5/325) and cwe wastes too much of the precious oxy. I heard Kratom helps with withdrawl. Sorry I'm not sure where to post this message as it is the first 5 minutes of being registered to this forum. I need a friend or someone to help me through this. Someone who can call me on my phone to see how I'm doing and give me moral support. Even to hang out with me physically would be wonderful down the line. Apart from being needy for company I do want to prevent the withdrawl from getting worst. It's at bay right now. Up to a week ago I was taking 5-6x 30mg oxy ir daily this week till today I had 5-6 30mg morphine which I felt a little withdrawl still from the oxy. Since running out today I had 7.5mg roxicodone at 530am then my last 30mg morphine er at 10:45am and lastly half of a fake oxy at 7pm. Withdrawals are much less than I remember them to be from last year though. Another question I want to ask is this....
since switching to morphine 30s for the last week, isn't that in itself a huge cut in how much I take? So I'm really just withdrawing on like 3 oxy instead of 5 a day after converting? Further since I snort it and morphine is absorbed half the percentage as oxy when snorting and being 2/3 as potent did I further taper a lot without realizing it and that's why I'm surviving sort of normal on the small amounts I had today? Hope this message wasn't too hazy. Thank you in advance for all the help.
Let me begin with a little of my history. In regards to opiates; 4 years total with peak dosage of 330mg roxicodone daily. I have brought myself down over the last year to about 100mg and even further down to 30mg in recent months. I am on a taper program but had a "fuck it" moment which causes me to shoot back to 5x 30mg roxi (150mg) a day. This is the case up until last week in which I ran out and have none left. I turned to 30mg morphine er in which I used a scalpel to scrape the purple coating off before crushing and finally railing it(snorting). I have only ever snorted since first starting. I thought I was lucky and picked up some a 215 yesterday. Unfortunately I'm almost positive they are fake from my experience in taste, color recognition, brittleness when breaking, smell, and of course the feeling. The back of this pill protrudes double the ammount as the top half with the writing. Based on what I can see on the internet it most likely contains fentynyl if it's fake. Because I am withdrawing and also out of the morphine 30s, will very very small peices of the fake roxi help? I can usually snort 60mg at a time and be normal but a third of this fake a215 (10mg) causes a high. I'm really depressed and down. I'm lost in my own world with no friends anymore, torn relationship, no job, 8 years in college and still didn't graduate. What I'm asking here is a mixture of venting and help seeking all in one. I know my message isn't clear yet it feels like some sort of relief to be able to type to people that I'm sure have experienced similar issues. Suboxone makes me sick. The taste, just everything about it is terrible not to mention I don't want to have my name in any database. Though people claim it's confidential, having Physicians for cousins, uncles, etc. I know it's possible for records to be seen and that I cannot ever have. This suboxone clinic is out of the question. Withdrawing and tapering guides are around everywhere, I know. No where gives me info on using fentanyl to help with oxy withdrawl from what I see. I don't know what to do at all. I had a stomach issue last week where a biopsy was done. I can't take Percocet (I have 6x 5/325) and cwe wastes too much of the precious oxy. I heard Kratom helps with withdrawl. Sorry I'm not sure where to post this message as it is the first 5 minutes of being registered to this forum. I need a friend or someone to help me through this. Someone who can call me on my phone to see how I'm doing and give me moral support. Even to hang out with me physically would be wonderful down the line. Apart from being needy for company I do want to prevent the withdrawl from getting worst. It's at bay right now. Up to a week ago I was taking 5-6x 30mg oxy ir daily this week till today I had 5-6 30mg morphine which I felt a little withdrawl still from the oxy. Since running out today I had 7.5mg roxicodone at 530am then my last 30mg morphine er at 10:45am and lastly half of a fake oxy at 7pm. Withdrawals are much less than I remember them to be from last year though. Another question I want to ask is this....
since switching to morphine 30s for the last week, isn't that in itself a huge cut in how much I take? So I'm really just withdrawing on like 3 oxy instead of 5 a day after converting? Further since I snort it and morphine is absorbed half the percentage as oxy when snorting and being 2/3 as potent did I further taper a lot without realizing it and that's why I'm surviving sort of normal on the small amounts I had today? Hope this message wasn't too hazy. Thank you in advance for all the help.
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