feeling alone lately

[leaving&nogoodbye]

my ex isn't a bad person, i don't hate him but when my life hit hard times he was nowhere to be found, and now that things are better he wants to come back, i was on my own for over a year while my life was a living hell. We were together for over 5 years.
I've worked hard to get to where I'm at now! I have a good job and things are really looking up.......is it out of line for me to turn him down? I guess i just hoped for someone who would stand by me through the hard times too. I feel like maybe he's just interested now because of what i can do for him.......i just wish for someone to love me always, not just when I'm easy to.love.......still I'm so tired of waiting for the "right one" i guess I'm just wondering if forgiveness is always the most important thing......

 

[Tude]

Listen to your brain. Don't take that piece of shit back!

 

[Beachcat]

No way are you out of line for not necessarily wanting to give him a second chance. Forgiveness is good...only good things come from forgiveness. But just because you forgive him does not mean that you have to forget that he treated you so poorly.

As a matter of fact, truly and totally give him your forgiveness with all of your being. If you can, this will free you up to go out and find someone who will be a true partner to you.

Trust your senses if they tell you that his motive for wanting to get back with you may not be pure.

I can sympathize with the feeling alone part....but sometimes you can feel more alone in a sucky relationship than you do when truly alone, you know?

 

[Montaka]

how do i start a thread. i know this is off topic but im desperate and need answers! please help!

 

[Pagey]

Montaka, you start a thread by clicking 'New Thread' at the top of whichever forum suits it.
In the future, please don't spam the forum/ these kinds of questions can be asked in the support forum. Thanks

To the OP - definitely don't take him back! It's normal for you to find excuses for his behavior and justify what he did, but the fact is he was everything but there for you and you deserve to have someone better in your life. If you're stuck with him you won't be able to find that person who will look after you.

 

[Stevenski]

The OP needs to elaborate a bit here. What were these hard times you had? All instinct tells me the guy is garbage but without knowing the background of his leaving I can offer no advice.

 

[pofacedhoe]

its like a boyfriend version of fair weather friends

i would say find someone who can support you- something you say he failed to do

who out of the two of you has been the breadwinner in this relationship? if it was the op then kick him to the kerb...

 

[leaving&nogoodbye]

I guess to make a long story short,i was hospitalized 3 times for major surgeries in the past year, i found out i couldn't concieve children and my best friend passed away all in the span of that year, he never showed up at the hospital, i gained alot of inner strength through all of it but it still broke my heart that he wasnt there........ Looking at it from all of your feedback makes it easier to put it into perspective, thank you all for your responses, i definitely appreciate it!