Thanks 10years, Somni! I'm glad I have somewhere to come whine an not be judged. Everyone here (including my dr) seems to think in just weak. Which I know I'm not because I've survived so much physically and emotionally in my 30+ years of life. But it's so easy to let these people in my head.
I don't know how much methadone I have left but the bottle gets smaller everyday. I measured it after spilling an entire bottle and it's somewhere on here. I'll go back and find it and post. Also my roxis are 20mg not 30. I was in a lot of pain yesterday so I took 2 since 1 did nothing and it helped some but not like I thought. I took another 10 mg today. But I seem to remember when talking to TPD that I wouldn't have enough to do 30,20,15,10,987654321. I would have to go 20,15,10,5 then 4321. Seems like it was around 400mg measuring wih a teaspoon. But they may be wrong. Im not thinking straight today. So the drop from 10-5 is going to suck since that's half a dose. And dr dick seemed not to care. Well I know he doesn't since he yelled at me for 20 minutes and called me weak. This is my last chance and I'm afraid I will run out of roxi if I'm already having to take them now at 10mg.
This depression sucks! Stuff that I had buried deep down from years and years ago came to surface and I'm not good at dealing with feelings in general especially not those kind. I'm not someone who cries ever. I've always been able to hold it in and take care of everyone else. Now I'm a mess. I cry over nothing. Is that normal or am I literally losing my shit?
Somni I'm so glad to see you posting. I tried to pm you a couple days ago I see how you were doing but aome weird message popped up on the screen. Hope you are feeling better.
?Barb