Fuck.
I can't say I didn't know this would happen. I sort of did.
But I forgot.
So now that I have gotten rid of my addictions and my pharmaceuticals, I have the urge to pull my eyelashes out.
It was a compulsion I had since I was a little girl. I don't understand how or why I ever started. My eyelids bothered me; they itched and sometimes one or the other would twitch. I know it sounds disgusting. Here's the worst:
I pinched my eyelashes between my thumb and index finger and I pulled. My eyelashes came out one or two at a time. Sometimes I continued until I had no eyelashes on one eye.
I did this fairly regularly until I started Prozac and Xanax, years ago. I don't even remember when I started taking Prozac and Xanax. It's been well over one decade and probably two. In all these years I have not pulled my eyelashes out.
Tonight, if I were not typing, I would be tugging over my right eye. My eyelid feels hot. I started to pull at my eyelashes earlier tonight while I was watching a movie. I became fully aware that I was tugging at my lashes and I forced myself to stop before I had pulled a single one.
If I am to overcome this really embarrassing tic, I'm going to have to think of a plan.
to be continued.
I can't say I didn't know this would happen. I sort of did.
But I forgot.
So now that I have gotten rid of my addictions and my pharmaceuticals, I have the urge to pull my eyelashes out.
It was a compulsion I had since I was a little girl. I don't understand how or why I ever started. My eyelids bothered me; they itched and sometimes one or the other would twitch. I know it sounds disgusting. Here's the worst:
I pinched my eyelashes between my thumb and index finger and I pulled. My eyelashes came out one or two at a time. Sometimes I continued until I had no eyelashes on one eye.
I did this fairly regularly until I started Prozac and Xanax, years ago. I don't even remember when I started taking Prozac and Xanax. It's been well over one decade and probably two. In all these years I have not pulled my eyelashes out.
Tonight, if I were not typing, I would be tugging over my right eye. My eyelid feels hot. I started to pull at my eyelashes earlier tonight while I was watching a movie. I became fully aware that I was tugging at my lashes and I forced myself to stop before I had pulled a single one.
If I am to overcome this really embarrassing tic, I'm going to have to think of a plan.
to be continued.
